Little did I know there was a horrifying twist in the bottom text.

Thesaurus-Man entered. "Actually..."

Thats when i realized my insides was uncomfortable from the meat and it was moving vigorously through my intestines and it was not gonna end pretty

(Based on a true story)

Big sandwich 🫪

'hey it's me it's verity ask me anything' I heard from a small cardboard box

To my horror, when I did, in blood on the toilet paper was my home address.

its too bad it flooded instead of tornadoing...

upon further inspection, i realized he said "i was watching you two poop" and his fingerprints are on my bathroom window

Cause you'll start dreaming about the meat twink .

The issue I'm having now is that I sleep naked, and my sleep paralysis demon had sewn my ass crack shut.

help me

I DON'T! Said knowing man

I said to the black, faceless smoke hovering over the magic lamp.

And he did, to 26 April 1986 in Pripyat.

It was very good in fact, except for the part where it made my penis explode at the speed of light.

they were actually fartcore & they took turns farting on my balls & smashed my whole penis with a guitar

As the boy laughed at the pregnant lady, he remembered his dad shaved the head of his sister for laughing at a bald woman.

Penile degloving.

It is because ghosts play with our wieners while we sleep.

Then I was killed by Night Night Murder Guy

Revealed implication of grave consequences through reference to in-group knowledge.

"Well I don't" says the knowing man