I started a lengthy and overly-wordy description of my problem, but I realized you don't need my entire relationship history.

In short - not only has my (65F N DX) "likely ADHD" husband (78F N DX) stopped contributing to the household (in terms of chores/repairs, as he has NEVER contributed financially so this was supposed to be how he was an equal partner) - but, when I try to non-confrontationally request that specific maintenance tasks be completed (via a "task board") - he ignores it. Even when he performs that task, he doesn't tell me that he has completed it, so I often have no way to know that it has been done.

How do you ask that an ADHD partner do their part without pissing them off, but hold them accountable for actually doing their part, and then get them to communicate that they have done their part?

P.S. I also am "likely ADHD," but I try my damndest to do those things that I'm responsible for doing.

The end of a relationship with an ADHD loved one can be tumultuous, confusing and leave a lasting impact. Use this thread to temporarily process a recent breakup with an ADHD individual, discuss co-parenting issues, share encouragement for life after the relationship etc. With the goal of ultimately decentering an ADHD ex 

(Note: Asking about leaving a partner and requests to speculate on behavior or symptoms are still prohibited.)

An ADHD impacted relationship often requires a lot of hard work, endurance and trial and error. Maybe you have agreed on a new "to-do list" and it works, a new medication or therapy is working as intended, or the laundry has been done in a timely manner etc. Here is where we celebrate the victories, no matter how small.