r/AskReddit • u/cuddly_trex • 1d ago
What's the fastest you've seen someone go from first day to fired?
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u/LTxBackside 1d ago
Saw a girl get fired because she wouldn't stfu in orientation. Like 35 mins in.
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u/Mirewen15 22h ago
I work with a woman who was recently told she was no longer allowed to attend meetings for her LOB (line of business). Apparently she would monopolize everyone's time with inane questions that did not need to be asked.
I know it is true because whenever we have combined meetings (across all LOB) she will inevitably make the meeting 30 minutes longer. I've started just leaving when the meeting time is up.
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u/HesSoZazzy 17h ago
Oh god there's something I don't miss about corporate life. Everyone just wants to move the fuck on yet there's one person in the room or on the call who either loves the sound of their own voice or is dumb as a box of rocks and can't get it. So 20 people need to sit while they blather on while everyone wants to strangle them because we got the gist 15 minutes ago. AND IT'S ALMOST LUNCH. bah!
Now I sleep in and my biggest worry is what to have for lunch. Me <3 retirement.
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u/Duce-de-Zoop 1d ago
Lol what was she saying?
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u/LTxBackside 1d ago
Explaining how they did things better at the last place she got fired from lol.
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u/PeterLemonjellow 1d ago
My employer is one of the kindest people I've ever met in my life, but it does lead to some... less than optimal new hires.
Years back I was leaving as manager of one location, so they hired someone to take over. This woman lived very close by, and our business was very community oriented, and my boss really thought it would be a good fit. I recommended someone else because something just seemed... off. Alas, she was hired... and fired on day two.
She did live very close, and she was also a completely insane trust fund baby (this was in Los Gatos, CA - super rich area). On day two she just... disappeared. She was the only person that was supposed to be on site (my boss' husband just happened to stop in while she was gone), so she left the place unlocked, unsupervised and with no indication of where she'd gone or when she'd be back. She ended up being gone for about an hour, and then got back at like 11AM because this was right at the start of the day.
Where had she gone? Well, she didn't like the shoes she'd picked out for her outfit so she walked home to change, then walked back. They weren't broken, uncomfortable, etc. - she just didn't feel pretty enough in them and wanted to be giving people the best possible impression. Her words.
It was at that point my boss finally stopped being kind. Unbelievable. This woman was like 40+ years old, too, not just some teen or something.
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u/CaptApplestrawberry 23h ago
This is the most los gatos/palo Alto story I've heard in a while.
I went to grad schools nearby and the amount of Lucille Bluth rich women I dealt with on a daily basis was astounding.
My favorite was I was standing outside a restaurant waiting for my girlfriend at the time and some lady comes hands me keys to her car and was like don't scratch the Cadillac. Y'all this was outside a pizza my heart restaurant, a chain that definitely does not have valet parking. I remember laughing at her and just handing her back her keys, she was incredulous.
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u/soyel_cerdo 22h ago
I would love to know how being that rich feels lke
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u/CaptApplestrawberry 20h ago
I used work with the ultra wealthy as a psychologist. Best way I can describe it is many of them live in the world as the main character of a story and they have exceptional plot armor.
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u/axxxaxxxaxxx 20h ago
Seems to me a lot of people like that are deeply unhappy and can never figure out why
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u/CaptApplestrawberry 19h ago
Oh we know why. They grow up in abusive households where human connection is considered secondary to making money.
If youre grow up around a bunch of psychopaths who only care about wealth and power, you have have internalized your emotional needs do not matter as long as you are bathed in luxury.
Its really sad honestly. They are rich but they’ll never truly be wealthy.
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u/Iggins01 21h ago
Bro, yoy were supposed to park it 10 miles away and lock the keys in it
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u/PeterLemonjellow 19h ago
If it was the Pizza My Heart in Los Gatos, that's about a block from where my story took place!
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u/Wosota 22h ago
You guys left a new hire completely alone on location on their second day of work?
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u/PeterLemonjellow 19h ago
Oh, yeah. I'm right there with you. Seriously, when I say my boss is "Kind", it's kind to a fault. She just... trusts people. It's frankly very inspiring... but sometimes also extremely inconvenient.
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u/FLOHTX 1d ago
I was a sales director and got one of the old salespeople from my old job hired on. He was good and I thought he would be a good fit. Apparently HR had him start before all his background stuff got completed. They fired him day 2 for failing his drug test for cocaine. HR then immediately drug tested me, thinking I was also on the blow. Negative.
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u/GoodOlSpence 1d ago
Failing a drug screen for cocaine is wild because that shit is out of your system really quickly. He must have been partying the night before.
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u/GregLoire 1d ago
Well yeah, new job celebration.
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u/act1v1s1nl0v3r 21h ago
I used to work in construction, and we once had a guy who called after his piss test to ask if we screen for alcohol, and ask if he could retake it because he and his friends were partying right beforehand to celebrate him getting a job.
He ended up calling so much HR told us to forward him to legal if he calls again, and he had been told we were instructed to do so.
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u/Revolvyerom 18h ago
The only time I saw a manager re-test an employee was after he got a negative result on the rapid, and before the employee saw the blank results, they asked if THC would show up on the strip. (It would but if the test hit, it was too faint to clearly see).
Immediate re-test. No idea what would have happened if she stood her ground on the one test. (Even after the test was mailed to the lab she tested negative and kept her job but the manager was always on her after that)
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u/WebPollution 16h ago
I got a reverse of the retake story: It all started when my brother came back to town from Arizona. My brother was a chef, and he had gotten into candy making. He came home with a tin of candy and my friend Mikey ate most of the tin. Was a dick move, because I didn't get any, but the end result made it worth it. Mikey had a drug test the next day and failed it... for Opium... because he ate half a large tin of poppy seed candy. They let him retake it after a week or two, because this was before Oxy was the well known menace it is today, but it was still pretty fuckin hilarious.
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u/nope-nik-tesla 23h ago
The most amazing part of this story to me is that a sales job is testing people for coke
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u/Peewee223 23h ago
if you can't stop doing coke long enough to pass a drug test, which they almost certainly announced in advance, you have a worse problem than most sales folks.
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u/PineappleOnPizzaWins 23h ago
Exactly this.
The only person I know who got fired over a failed drug test was a contractor who got assigned to a client that required drug testing. They told the firm beforehand. The firm told everyone they wanted to assign “will you pass this test on day xyz?” and a couple people said nope so got assigned elsewhere. Everyone else was either clean or stopped before said test.
But one guy kept smoking right until the day of and failed. Immediately fired for embarrassing the firm, nobody actually gave a fuck that he smoked weed.
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u/CanaDoug420 1d ago
My company asked me to train the new guy. First day he told the boss to “take it down a notch” when giving direction. that was the last I saw him
Added: second one was we hired a maintenance guy and he was wearing a hoodie during the interview. He showed up first day in uniform and it was revealed he had an SS tattoo on the back of his neck. He was let go immediately.
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u/Rob_Zander 21h ago
Just overheard an ex con yesterday talking about how stupid it it when people fire him over his swastika. That they're dumb for not even asking what it means to him. It's sentimental for a time when he was with a group of like minded guys! Like minded Nazis. Which is the entire problem!
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u/WardenWolf 1d ago
Should have become an electrician; then at least he'd have an excuse. j/k
I will never understand people who get offensive tattoos and put them places they can't be easily hidden. But people dumb enough to do the former usually aren't that smart anyway.
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u/PalladiuM7 1d ago
I will never understand people who get offensive tattoos
Could've just stopped there; even ones that aren't racist as shit. I can't imagine that anime alien chick with her three tits and an ejaculating double dick fully depicted that I saw some guy had on his calf is going to look great when he's 70.
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u/big_ice_bear 23h ago
I used to work at a waterpark. Best bad tattoo I ever saw were vagina planes bombing penis tanks. Yes, plural. Yes, of both. It was a whole sleeve.
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u/HailSatanWorshipD00M 21h ago
There's an infamous tattoo done by a Texas artist named Dave Lum (iirc) that's a necklace of severed penises. Full chest, neck, and back piece.
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u/WiccanWilliam 22h ago
My boss hired a new gal, scheduled orientation for the following week. The gal showed up to her first day with a new tattoo over her eyebrow that read “that bitch” in fancy script. Sent home within the hour.
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u/FormerStuff 1d ago
Dude showed up to a manual labor job in Jordans and whatever those shark bite designer jeans are. I said whatever maybe he needs a paycheck or two to get proper work attire. He couldn’t speak much of English, again not a problem I speak enough Spanish to explain what to do.
One of my guys came to me and was like “hey boss somethings wrong with this guy, he’s like fucked up or something.” I go over there and sure as shit this man was obliterated drunk by 9 am. I guess he said he needed to grab something out of his car and that’s when he drank. Looked in the car and there was an empty fifth of vodka on the passenger seat. Fired him immediately.
I called his emergency contact, explained that he was drunk and to come get him because he’s been fired. His wife showed up, slapped the shit out of him and took him home.
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u/HuckleberryEither665 18h ago
This is an unsurprising large problem in the manual labor world in the US. My career revolves around manual labor/contracting and I'd guess that 1 in 5 of us are heavy drinkers and 1 and 10 are like your employee in Jordans. It's an incredibly hard life and even more difficult with social media pounding our heads in that this work is 'beneath' us when it absolutely isn't. The folks that do this work are heroes in my book. I'm ecstatic reading reddit feeds that talk about the alcohol industry tanking with post-covid adults. It makes me feel like maybe there is an end in site to this problem with alcoholism.
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u/GuiltyCaptain3 18h ago
That’s really interesting to me - in Australia we have a lot of respect for skilled tradies (sparky, plumber etc ), they earn a boatload of money and are kind of considered more “real” jobs than desk jobs.
I think it’s probably different for straight labourers, but most of them are young and either earning money to set themselves up, or learning about the whole of the industry.
My friend’s 18yo did 3 months after leaving school as a manual labourer and earned enough for a 6 month Europe backpacking trip. It’s good money here, and hard work.
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u/license_to_thrill 17h ago
Honestly it’s good work in the US as well and it’s respected, every dude in the trades I know makes 100k plus easily.
But the hours are long, the work is hard and it’s a lot of time away from family which can lead to drugs and alcohol abuse.
What I see on social media isn’t anything like the guy you responded to, it’s all a bunch of dorks who act like they survived the battle of the Somme after a 12 hr shift. Like cmon bro it’s a job that you chose to do and your wallets fat stfu lol
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u/RLCGooner 1d ago edited 18h ago
Saw someone who got let go the first day.
I was working as a government contractor and a new hire came aboard. While he was waiting on his work laptop to be configured, he pulled out another laptop from his bag to jump on a Microsoft Teams meeting.
Considering he didn’t have an account or email with our organization yet, we asked what meeting he was on after his call was done.
Turns out he was working another job. Guy had some brass balls to try work another job right in front of our clients.
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u/PineappleOnPizzaWins 22h ago
Hah best one I know of a guy got hired twice.
He was working for two contracting firms, one of which I have mates at. He was well known for doing good work but very slowly… basically you’d need to double the timeframe if he was involved. Of course this was because he literally had a second contracting job and so he was doing the same thing there and picking up two salaries for being a half arsed employee at both places.
Well unfortunately for him he gets assigned to a really big project and the client ends up needing more resources than they can provide. This isn’t uncommon and it just means the contractors hire subcontractors, which they did.
It’s a big firm and he had a common enough name so he actually managed to slip through being hired by his own employer, but when the subs got onboarded to the client their HR team flagged it and wanted to know why they were being billed twice for the same person.
Dude lost both jobs real fucking quick and his reputation got torched.
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u/loki1337 21h ago
Seems like this could've easily been maintained by wearing different outfits and deadpan
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u/PineappleOnPizzaWins 20h ago
Hah well it was all remote work which is how he got away with it for so long. Thing is though tons of clients here require a police check... the way those work here is you sign a consent form for whomever you want to work for and they get the check done via whatever accredited agency they use.
Unfortunately for this guy those checks do two things.. the first is obviously verify that you didn't just get out of prison for fraud or whatever other issue, but the second is quite literally to verify your identity to your employer and make sure you are who you say you are before they hire you.
Likely the guy never even thought about it, if you're contracting you fill in those consent forms basically every time you get hired out. Or he was dumb enough to think nobody would notice I guess.
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u/seantrell68 1d ago
I had to fire a forklift operator 15 minutes before his shift started. He showed up, was told not touch anything until his trainer arrived, proceeded to hop on a pallet jack he deemed “in the way” and drove it directly into our packaging machine.
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u/GonzoRouge 17h ago
Oh I got something like that. When I was down on my luck, my dad pulled some strings to have me work in a warehouse for a friend. A gig's a gig and I just needed a job. I go to the interview, they explicitly ask me if I have a driver's license and I tell them I don't. Why does it matter if I'm on time and pack boxes, right ? Anyways, I crush the interview and get the job. My dad buys me steel toed boots on account of me working in a warehouse and that being a requirement, told him I'd pay him back on my first paycheck.
Show up to work and they immediately drop me on a forklift. My experience driving vehicles amounts to bumper carts and I tell them even before I do anything that I'm definitely not qualified for this, I thought I was packing boxes. Trainer tells me no big deal, just do a few laps around the place to get a feel for it.
For the next 3 hours, I painstakingly learn how to operate a forklift by crashing into virtually every goddamn thing in the warehouse. At some point, a manager or something comes up to me and asks if I have forklift certification and I, again, say I never even drove a car before. I don't even know how to ride a bike, I don't understand why you guys put me here when I was clear I had no experience remotely relevant to this. They fire me on the spot, obviously.
I call my dad and tell him I got fired. He says "Already ? What the hell did you do ?" so I tell him: "They put me on a forklift and told me to figure it out".
To this day, I remember vividly that exchange. After a long pause, he says "What the fuck ? I told them you specifically couldn't do that when they asked, let me call them".
I don't know what he told them but, knowing how my dad gets when he's pissed, I'm fairly certain he used more curses than actual words. Turns out the only job they could offer me was forklift operator, something that was never mentioned at any point, even after I crashed into the entire warehouse. They also refunded him for the boots and I guess that's the story of how I was the worst forklift operator on Earth for 3 hours and got a free pair of steel toed boots.
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u/andreasbeer1981 12h ago
whoever let you drive a forklift without any qualification needs to get fired immediately. that's how people get killed.
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u/GonzoRouge 12h ago
I was terrified honestly, but I really needed the money so I figured it was just growing pains or whatever and to suck it up.
I got marginally better at it by the end though, I think I managed to do one whole lap without crashing into something.
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u/thelastholdout 20h ago
I think being fired at negative fifteen minutes might be the record here.
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u/65variant 19h ago
Warehouse staff are a real random assortment of 'will they last more than a few months?' or 'how long will this one stay healthy?'
Not 30 minutes after a hands on demonstration of 'safe use of a walkie rider' as a refresher safety course, I had a temp run that exact riding pallet jack (walkie rider) into a wall with a one ton load - she had steel toed shoes on but her foot was positioned in such a way that when she hit the concrete wall her foot was crushed between the pallet jack and the wall. She left in an ambulance. Four hours later, I got a call that she'd lost 4 of her 5 toes (the cap on the steel toes essentially crushed her toes). She was drug tested and failed. Her agency had some sort of language that if they tested positive, they wouldn't cover related medical expenses. I never saw her again but I did have to deal with OSHA for a few months after that because it was a recordable incident.
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u/Arbiter_89 1d ago edited 1d ago
A guy at my work was fired after only 2 weeks.
During those 2 weeks he did a lot of things to annoy people, repeatedly resulting in him being called into our boss's office to be told "don't do that." It was annoying/stressing our boss to constantly have to tell this guy not to do very obvious things.
One day my boss calls him into his office for another chat. My boss isn't sure if he's going to fire him yet, but is going to see how the chat goes.
The guy starts off the conversation with "[Boss], you really need to relax." My boss said "You know, you're right. You're fired."
The dude had unknowingly recommended his own termination.
2 weeks later he came back to the office to try to convince our boss that our boss had made a mistake firing him. That did not go well.
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One example of something he did:
It was 2011 and we worked at a video game studio on an MMO that had been live for about 7 (EDIT: 5) years at that point. The graphics and in-house engine were clearly dated.
This guy was hired into QA largely because he played the MMO a lot and was very familiar with it, although he definitely wasn't familiar with game development... at all.
So on his first week there, he sends an email to the lead engineer and CCs a lot of people basically saying "You don't know what you're doing. I know how we can get our game to have better graphics and be less buggy. We just need to start using the Unreal Engine."
People who have any game dev experience are having their minds blown right now, but in case you don't understand what I'm writing... This guy was basically suggesting we completely rewire the entire game, using an engine that wasn't optimized for our genre, made it sound like it would be no-big-deal and publically called the lead engineer an idiot for not doing it. He had no idea what he was talking about, and spoke to others as if he knew everything the project should be doing.
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u/Eastwoodnorris 23h ago
For anyone who still doesn’t really understand why changing to Unreal Engine is a ridiculous thing to suggest: imagine you want to remodel your home. You ask a designer and they suggests that to start the remodel, you should re-do the foundation and re-frame your entire house. It’s like saying “to fix this, just do the whole thing over, but different.” It is not a fix or a change, it is a restart.
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u/Arbiter_89 20h ago
This is absolutely right. If I can add a little more context to this, you also need to appreciate that at the time Unreal wasn't built for MMOs. There were a few games that made it work but they were purpose built from the start.
It's kinda like having a car that's a little slow because it's a few years old so a mechanic recommends a entirely new engine, except that engine doesn't fit in your car, so you'll need several extensive modifications to that new engine to even make it fit... and the car runs just fine with its current engine, just a little slower than a brand new car.
Come to think of it, the best analogy would be the shop's new janitor telling the mechanic that they're an idiot for not using a new engine in the car that still runs.
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u/Hashtronaut_Mode 18h ago
"My cars gas mileage sucks"
"Just make it into an electric"
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u/im_thatoneguy 20h ago
Or like saying your engine is burning oil so you should drive your 3 kids around on a motorcycle. “It’s like way faster than your minivan.”
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u/Bullfrog_Paradox 22h ago
Yeah, it's literally building a new game from scratch that replicates the game you already have. That guy was a goddamn moron lol
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u/genericmediocrename 1d ago
MMO released in 2004
Was this man trying to sabotage WoW?
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u/Arbiter_89 1d ago
You're definitely not the first to ask, but it was not WoW. You have to remember, this was the age where EVERY company was releasing their own MMO. MMOs were the "it" genre for a while, then it was MOBAS, then it was battlegrounds games.
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u/asapfinch 1d ago
Hello Kitty Island Adventure?
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u/Arbiter_89 1d ago
Ok, I value my privacy so I don't want to be too specific, but I can say no. (Also pretty sure that HKIA didn't come out until later, even though South Park writers envisioned it around that time)
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u/djseifer 1d ago
Your boss was quite lenient. Pulling something like emailing development like that for something that stupid would have gotten you booted from the labs I've worked in.
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u/whiskeytown79 22h ago
I don't think I'd fire someone on the spot for doing something dumb like this, but I'd probably throw a "Quick chat" on their calendar at the first opportunity and be like "yeah, don't do that again. You haven't given anyone here a reason to trust your opinion yet, and this sort of thing is going to put you deeply in the negative, credibility-wise. You need to demonstrate that you know what you're talking about, and even then, an open letter calling out the lead developer is not the right avenue for constructive feedback."
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u/Syhkane 1d ago
Girl hired on Halloween, drunk before first shift.
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u/ancillaryacct 21h ago
i fired somebody literally the day before their first shift, during training, because he was obviously intoxicated.
the kid was desperate for work and it broke my heart to fire him..buuuut yeaaah, if you come into work AFTER drinking...when your shift started at 3pm...yeeeeahh
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u/Z_T_O 1d ago
Not Halloween, but similar experience. It was night shift, so there was no management on overnight duty. Start of the shift she was on her best behaviour until the last manager left, then as the night progressed the other team members and I started to notice some weird behaviour. Not long after break it became painfully obvious she had been drunk the whole time, and was continuing to drink throughout her shift. She was gone the next morning. I heard she came by a couple weeks later, very drunk, and looking for her paycheque
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u/OnTheEveOfWar 21h ago
I worked a corporate job and this new weird guy started. His second day he said he was going to the bar next door that served food for lunch and invited us. We all said no. He started going there every day for “lunch” and was obviously drinking. He got fired like two weeks later after he got blacked out at a company happy hour, tried to kiss one of his bosses, and lit up a cig inside a restaurant. Someone also sent his Twitter to HR because it was full of racist posts.
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u/NotFlameRetardant 19h ago
An old roommate of mine was a fresh college grad and got his first job out in marketing at a tech-ish company with an onsite bar. He started spending money like crazy as soon as he got his offer letter - all new furniture, top of the line new PC, GoPro, electronics, etc. I recommended he wait on big purchases until the first couple of paychecks came in.
Well, he never made it through the first full pay period. Halfway into his second week, he came home from work with a black trashbag and said "GUESS WHO GOT FIRED?". I thought he was joking at first but they bagged up his desk and had security walk him out. Turns out he was having a couple white russians with lunch every day, thinking that "having a bar at work" equaled "day drinking at work is a perk"
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u/abz_eng 1d ago
New IT hire, server manager - 20 years ago
Gets email with attachment, attachment is blocked by antivirus, so what does he do?
Into server room uses administrator on server to bypass antivirus & yes it was a virus.
Arrived 0900 walked out by 1200
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u/Charming-Ebb-1981 23h ago
Reminds me of a previous job where one of the Board of Directors fell for a scammer who sent an email impersonating our CEO and asked him for thousands of dollars of iTunes gift cards “for a client”
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u/punkterminator 22h ago
One of my coworkers fell for one of those scams on her very first day at work but she got to stay on because she hadn't started onboarding training yet. Ever since then, new employees don't get full email privileges until they've completed their online safety course.
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u/romprod 23h ago
A new hire was given the admin password within their first day? Oh how times have changed
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u/Sonikclaw2 1d ago
I work in a chemistry lab as the lead on one of our projects. One day I was in the office talking to my boss at around 9:45 in the morning, and this new guy walks in. He walks up and says “Sup, lardo.” Now, I’ll admit I’m something of a rotundship, but my boss and I were both shocked. He wasn’t even there for 15 minutes before he was fired.
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u/Tamachan_87 21h ago
Shelf stacker at a supermarket. First day orientation he picked up a 2L bottle of Cola off the shelf, opened it, too a drink, then put it back.
"Don't tell the boss" he said.
He was talking to his boss.
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u/fluffyfistoffury 1d ago
Interviewed a girl and immediately knew she was going to be a problem but the other 2 supervisors with me out voted me and hired her anyway. They said she reminded them of themselfs. The first day she couldn't pass licensing for her job and blamed the trainer for being racist even though the trainer had only told them how to access the same self learning modules as everyone else and had nothing to do with the grading. Then she left early without telling anyone. When she came back she brought the police and told them I had sexually harassed her even though I had only met her during the remote interview which was recorded. I'm not sure what her plan was because security footage shows everything as soon as you walk in the door. Police arrested her instead and she was not welcome back.
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u/NeedsToState 1d ago
UGGGGG my ex wife would do stuff like this. She didn't take it that far like showing up with the police, but she would make up fake 'creeper man" stories as to why she had to quit jobs - she just couldn't handle working in general.
It was always some shit story like "The new CFO kept me late and put his hand on my arm and said we need to work closer"
She got a few people fired over the years, she would go into complete witch hunt mode.
She got a job as assistant to the treasurer in 2006 at a wealthy city here in Southern California, I mean she could have been set for life with a forever job..............Quit three weeks in because she couldn't get along with the office ladies. Turned that info a fake "they were out to get me' story also.
Looking back I mean, I lost track of how many jobs she quit after working just a few days.
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u/FR_0S_TY 1d ago
My ex wife was a bumper sticker enthusiast. Every one was basically about how if you weren’t in some group she fell into you were less than.
Almost every day she would walk in and announce that some big-truck assholes had tried to “run her off the road and kill her.” It quickly turned into the story of the girl who cried big truck assholes.
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u/Complete-Kick2990 1d ago
I’ve learned my lessons with a woman like you described (or close enough). I’ll never ignore a messy work history or a woman that can’t get along with other women as a sign to run. ⛳️⛳️⛳️
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u/duiprincess 1d ago
istg people need to stop hiring people just because they “remind them” of someone/themselves. i’ve worked alongside so many personality hires and they are all AWFUL and just a detriment to other employees and the job itself. they all end up being fired within weeks/months
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u/anitabelle 1d ago
Had a guy last a couple weeks. A lot more than most of these stories but the reason was crazy. We thought he was a bit odd when he brought in 2 dozen donuts to celebrate his daughter’s birthday. Weird in retrospect but we didn’t care because it was free donuts. He even wrote “happy birthday” and his daughter’s name on the box.
We had 2 offices with 1 being in another state. We didn’t work very closely with the other team but they were part of our group and were on an introductory call with him. He had no reason to work with them. He pretended to be from a local fire department from that state and called one of the ladies in the other office (again, in another state) to tell her that her house was on fire. She recognized his voice and he hadn’t bothered to dial anonymously. But she was hysterical at first before common sense kicked in. He was escorted out shortly after she called the General Counsel. Yes, this was a legal department.
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u/gbs5009 1d ago
Very strange. The donut thing seems fine... I wouldn't have batted an eye if he just brought donuts as a random act of kindness. Can't imagine why he would make a crank call about somebody's house like that.
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u/isysopi201 16h ago
I thought he bought the donuts for his daughter but the Mother of the child does not want this man anywhere near them.
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u/jeffderek 19h ago
I'd have assumed he stole the donuts from someone else and after he stole them found out it said "Happy Birthday Natalie" or whatever on them and made up a story to justify it.
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u/Newcs91 1d ago
New agency guy at the warehouse. First day with a standard dress code. Man in a suit stops him on the way in and tells him his workwear isn’t appropriate…. Replies “ who the fuck do you think you are telling me what I can wear!?” … “ I’m the site manager”
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u/wetwater 20h ago
I had an employee pretty much corner me, incensed that the security guard asked her to display her work ID as per company policy. She wanted to know "who the fuck gave him that authority". I replied his supervisor, me. Long pause while she considered this information before she stalked off. Sent that interaction to her manager and she was spoken to about it. I wish I could say that was the last time she butted heads with security, but at least she wore her badge as she was supposed to.
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u/broadwayandellsworth 1d ago
I was working a job in bumfuck nowhere alaska. Apparently they brought this poor guy up because they said he was good but when he finally got up there for the job, apparently there was something wrong with the background check and it kept going back and forth for about a week so we were trying to train him but we weren't sure how much we should train him but he eventually he was let go which was really shitty for him coming all that way. Fortunately the company did pay for him to get back home
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u/Venusto002 1d ago
How's the salmon in Bumfuck Nowhere?
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u/broadwayandellsworth 1d ago
There be 5 types of salmon! Oh gawd, tour guides got me! Almost any tour you go on, it's the same thing. Three types of bears, the five types of salmon. don't go to Starbucks without your bear spray or you might get mauled!
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u/imasneakybeaver 1d ago
I was working at a computer repair shop when we hired a new guy. I trained him to check customers in, so he worked the front counter while I handled repairs in the back.
On his second day, the phone rang. A woman on the other end was furious. She asked if he worked there. I asked what had happened, and she told me she’d come in the day before. He had asked her out, and which she declined. Later that night, he started messaging her inappropriate things; first by text, then on Facebook. Her facebook profile clearly stated that she was in a relationship and her profile pic reflected that as well.
I called the owner, explained everything, and gave him her number. Fifteen minutes later, the owner called the new guy and told him he was fired. Dude was actually confused about what he did wrong.
He was hired, and fired in two days.
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u/repwin1 1d ago
Had an HR manager last about a week because they hired him before the background check came back. He had a conviction for identity theft.
Different job they hired a metallurgist who made it about 2 weeks before someone found her Facebook page where she posted how she put a curse on the plant. It made management uneasy so they fired her. About 3 years later the place did close down but I think it was due to the incompetency of the managers.
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u/Draken09 1d ago
If someone is going to place a curse, I'm worried about them engaging in actual sabotage. Or negligence thinking their curse is working.
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u/Phil8show 1d ago
Few hours.
On the walkthrough of our loading dock he was on his phone not paying attention and when my boss brought this up he put up his index finger to her in a "shush, a moment" fashion and continued texting.
Damn dumbass kids.
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u/cad908 1d ago
omg. i wonder if the kid even learned not to do that, or if they genuinely didn't understand why they were being let go.
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u/mronion82 1d ago
Physically fighting in the smoking area during her first break in training.
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u/Salmonhunter 1d ago
I worked in a warehouse as a team lead right out of college. The company was an athleisure apparel company so dress codes were relatively lax and many women wore yoga pants. A new temp employee on his first day who I was training said to me, his boss, “I’m gonna show up in yoga pants tomorrow so these bitches know how hard it is not to look.” Walked him out immediately
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u/Tooth31 20h ago
I struggle so hard to comprehend the idea that not only would someone have the smugness, audacity, and whatever else is needed to think that, but also somehow say it to another person, and not only just another person, but a person whom you've presumably just met and is your boss. On one hand I'm infuriated that he exists, on the other I'm almost jealous that they have that level of confidence and stupidity, as they must be living their best life based on the phrase "ignorance is bliss".
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u/DeadMoneyDrew 19h ago
I'm a white dude and I occasionally experience the phenomenon of someone assuming that they can freely say misogynistic or bigoted horseshit to me about someone else, just because we share the same gender and ethnicity. It's maddening but it serves as a periodic reminder of what women and minorities have to put up with.
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u/Sensitive_Crow_8882 22h ago
He founded the Megging company and is now a billionaire.
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u/RosieByAnotherName 1d ago
the new press secretary :)
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u/Zambonisaurus 1d ago
She lasted half a mooch.
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u/raynear 18h ago
She didn't say she passed the bar.
She said she passed out in a bar.
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u/Curleysound 1d ago
2nd day. We were working at a Gold Mine in deep alaska, making a reality show (not goldrush) and we were embedded in a Mormon run family owned mining operation. We were having trouble with production assistant positions, either being incompetent or unable to commit. The DP of the show (not the on site camera) sent his daughter up to us. On day one, she was great, just what we wanted. That night, one of the equipment operators coerced her into stealing our production truck (chevy suburban), driving 45 miles to the nearest bar, getting hammered, then breaking into that guy’s cousin’s house to smash on his couch. Cousin came home and didn’t recognize the guy so he beat the shit out of him and was going to have him arrested but they left and were rolling back into the mine camp just as we were getting up and realizing our truck was gone. They were both still drunk and she was driving. He was an ex con and the mine was totally sober. The boss was told that she’s gone immediately or we were all gone immediately, so the producer had to drive her 180 miles back to Fairbanks and explain to her dad what happened.
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u/Squeezitgirdle 1d ago
I got hired at a credit card company. On my first day, the girl I was shadowing asked me if I thought the trainer was hot.
I said: I guess? I didn't really think about it, I have a girlfriend.
I was fired an hour later and told I wasn't a good fit. I'm still not sure what the correct answer was there.
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u/Birdhawk 1d ago
The correct answer is "That's not an appropriate question and goes against the company code of conduct."
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u/VikingRodeo9 1d ago
I didn’t actually hear this, but one of our brand new marketing associates made a comment that someone’s food smelled “like Emmett Till’s rotting corpse.” Two black colleagues were present.
Security walked her out 30 minutes later.
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u/Germanium235 22h ago
For those who are unaware, Emmett Till was a fourteen year old Black boy who was abducted and lynched in the summer of 1955 in Mississippi.
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u/Serious-Manager2361 22h ago
Not just lynched, but horribly tortured and mutilated.
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u/Darmug 21h ago
And his mother held an open casket funeral for everyone to see, so that everyone attending had to look at the corpse of Emmett and could not ignore his mutilated body.
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u/letsgomets5 20h ago
And it was proven the "crime" that got him lynched (whistling at a white woman) was something he didn't even do. Accuser eventually admitted it was made up. Disgusting all around.
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u/Malcolm_Morin 20h ago
AND the accuser got to live a full life and died a few years ago of old age.
AND her grave remains untouched.
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u/positivelypt 21h ago
You are leaving out important context to how awful this was. Why did they do this? Because a white woman accused him of whistling at her. Decades later this same woman admitted she lied. Prosecutor decided not to bring charges. His mom had an open casket at his funeral so the public could see what they did to her son. Brave woman.
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u/Germanium235 19h ago
And, to add more context (awful, awful context), they tortured him before they hung him. That was a big part of the reason for the open casket.
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u/DeadMoneyDrew 20h ago
She was smart enough to understand that the funeral would get world media coverage, and she wanted the world to see the ugly results of bigotry.
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u/ElCiclope1 17h ago
I'm not saying you shouldn't share the details, but I want to make sure people realize there was nothing unique or special about what happened to Emmett Till. It happened hundreds, if not thousands, of times for decades. No sitting president would even acknowledge it was happening because it wasn't happening to anyone they cared about.
The only thing that made this different is the picture. Otherwise it was just as vicious and disgusting as the many other lynchings.
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u/Jihelu 21h ago
I was driving a new guy around when working part time at a park
We drove by a black biker hangout, like I think the sign mentioned it.
He goes ‘harr harr what if I identified as black do you think they’d let me in?’ And I kinda just looked at him and went ‘no probably not’ and he got extremely defensive
He also randomly started with a ‘I don’t get why people identify as -random shit here-‘ rants completely unprompted
I told my boss he was a weirdo and I think he got fired for something unrelated a week later
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u/gbs5009 23h ago
That's very weird.
Like, is that an expression that people actually say anywhere?
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u/Germanium235 22h ago
The fact that she's referring to a 14 year old Black boy that was lynched means, no, PEOPLE DO NOT SAY THIS UNLESS THEY ARE RACIST AS FUCK.
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u/Tooth31 20h ago
I would go so far as to say, even the top percent of the top percent of the most racist people in the world would not say this, particularly in front of black people. This person had to have been exceptionally messed up to an incomprehensible degree.
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u/Anothernamelesacount 21h ago
As someone not familiar with said person, with that context, yes, that's some high tier racism
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u/Adarie-Glitterwings 21h ago
'Smells like a rotting corpse' yeah rude but sounds normal.
'Smells like (specific lynching victim)'s rotting corpse' racist as fuck and trying to cause problems.
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u/Hot_Cheesecake_905 18h ago edited 17h ago
Emmett Till’s rotting corpse
That's a pretty specific reference, to a pretty old event, I wonder what prompted the person to use it.
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u/bp24416 23h ago
I had been at a company for maybe 2 months working in IT and sitting in on employee orientation. New hourly employees watch some training videos and then went through some training on computers depending on their job. They were sat at computers during the video portion but were not supposed to use them.
I was new and our security was not great, turns out the computers didn't have content filtering of really any kind.
One guy spent the entire video training time looking up dog fighting videos and showing them to anyone nearby. He was very enthusiastic about it and talked about how he wanted to get into dog fighting. He then got some pop-ups of porn images and left it on screen turning the monitor off, I assume so the next person could see it too. He actually tried to say he didn't do it even though I was in the room. HR contacted me after I reported it and asked for browser history on the computer, already had it pulled and sent. Altogether he made it maybe an hour at the job.
Security was put in place that day so it couldn't happen again. He might not have even got fired for the porn given that they were popups but I was fucking furious about the dog fighting thing and made sure they actually fired him.
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u/extrasprinklesplease 17h ago
I worked in a tech department and about 20 years ago I had a high school student intern. It was part of an educational program, so he was just with us in the morning. I gave him a few tasks to do, but thought he spent a lot of time just staring at the computer. I checked his browser history after he left and he'd been visiting different Aryan Brotherhood websites. I told my director, and he was pulled off the program the same day.
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u/BumblebeeComplex2792 23h ago
Intern used their corporate credit card to BUY a Honda civic “because you told us to ensure we had reliable means of transportation.”
We had many trainings after this. And there was a new policy re: spend limits for intern cards.
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u/ShortOneSausage 1d ago
This guy didn’t get fired, but he showed up first day and we were working off of ladders about 20’ in the air. He climbed about 2/3rds of the way up the ladder, stopped, and climbed back down just saying “nahhh this isn’t for me” and left.
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u/Crafty-Message4564 18h ago
That's a little different than most of the others.
That's someone who realized the job was more than he could handle, and then decided to do what was best for everyone involved.
Very respectable.
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u/Parking_Chance_1905 1d ago
New associate in training on his first day when I worked retail, was supposed to learn how to stock, check skus etc. He decided to show initiative by asking to install a tv for display in an empty spot from when we had sold the last display model.
He was told to wait for someone to assist as the space was 4 shelves up and required a ladder. He decided to move the TV to the floor and waited until everyone else was occupied to attempt the install himself.
The TVs were set up so they all ran HDMI from the same switch so we only needed one display running that was then copied to all the others. So this guy gets the TV up there, manages to hook an HDMI cord in, good so far. Except that he then turned apparently it to far while trying to plug in the power, and one side of the stand slipped off the shelf, he falls, TV falls, bringing the entire display with it due to then all being connected by cable.
Ended up destroying 20-25 or so larger 50+ inch sets, this was back in 2014 so they were bigger for the time. I found out when they called me in on my day off to go in and help clear out the mess, check what still worked and set up an entire new display. I got there as management was walking him out.
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u/grayscale_rashamon 1d ago
Liz Truss, UK PM. She served office for 49 days, even a lettuce head outlasted her tenure.
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u/ThePowerfulPaet 1d ago
I mean right now the new US press secretary didn't even last 5 days.
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u/Always_Relevant_Name 1d ago
Yeah but how much damage did she do?
Cause Liz Truss killed the economy and the monarch in those 49 days...
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u/sweepernosweeping 1d ago
And because Queen Liz passed, all of our politics were put on recess to observe her passing - so that 49 day tenure wasn't even really 49 days.
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u/JacobRAllen 20h ago edited 20h ago
I am in the interview process, I think he would be good, he eventually gets selected, and would work directly under my supervision. His first day was a Monday, and was told he could come in late cause the first day is just orientation stuff and getting his accounts setup (software developer).
He shows up around 10am, which is perfect for me, I just finish a meeting and start briefing him. We get his computer set up and all his credentials in order by around 3pm, and he’s ready to start working. I told him he could stay and piddle around and read up on our documentation, or he could bail out early and just read up on it at home. He did end up staying because unbeknownst to me, he didn’t have a ride, and his mom dropped him off. No big deal, he’s in his early 20s, not that uncommon. He was weirdly quiet though, like almost catatonic. I just assumed it was information overload and he was taking it in. I give him some standard paperwork to fill out, and just asked him to have it filled out by the end of the week, it was just basic stuff, the important of which in this case was emergency contact information.
Next morning, Tuesday, he’s there early, 7:30am, and he drove himself there, and I’m like great, a go-getter, trying to make a good impression. I sit in his cubical for about 10 min chatting, explaining what I kind of expected him to start doing to get familiar with stuff, and then leave him be. I didn’t think too much about it because I had my other stuff going on, but a coworker walks in and says ‘what’s wrong with [newguy]?’ I’m confused and asked him what he was doing, and my coworker says ‘nothing, like literally nothing, I walked past his cube and he’s staring at monitors that are turned off’. I walk out there to check on him, his computer had gone to hibernation mode, and he was still staring directly at the monitor.
At this point I don’t know if this guy is fucking with me, or if he’s got some sort of narcolepsy where he sleeps with his eyes open, or is having a medical emergency or what. I try to get his attention ‘hey [newguy]’… nothing, I turn him around in his chair, and his eyes are still deadlocked straight forward, they didn’t move at all while he was rotating. ‘Hey man are you okay??’ as I grab his shoulder and gently rock him back and forth. Finally his gaze shifts and he looks at me directly in the eye, and doesn’t say a word. I ask again, ‘are you okay??’, no response, no movement, no nothing. I immediately call my boss’s office phone, have him come down to check out the situation. During the next 5-8 min, I have walked out of this guy’s gaze, but his eyes didn’t move, he was still staring at where I used to be, and not blinking, it was very creepy. During that time, we called 911 and requested an ambulance.
Response time was great, firefighter EMTs were there in about 3 min, and an ambulance showed up another 3 min after that. They spent the next ~90 min trying to get this guy to become responsive. He would sometimes follow basic commands, we could get him to walk to the break room and sit at a table, but he wouldn’t answer questions. He finally pointed at the wall, an empty spot on the wall, and said ‘look’. It was haunting, nobody knew what the hell he was pointing at. They ask if he’s got any medical history and we are telling them we don’t even know him, he hasn’t even filled out his emergency contact information. I went back to his cube and he had a backpack and his phone on his desk. I open his backpack and see some medical looking paperwork, and I didn’t want to invade privacy so it took the whole backpack to the EMTs. They flipped through a couple pages and said he had checked himself into the hospital the night before for ‘confusion’ but was discharged without any explanation. During that time, they took some saliva and did a field drug test to see if he was on anything, and it showed negative for everything that they test for.
At this point we are trying to do anything to find contact info, cause the EMTs said they can’t take him without his permission. This was before Face ID on iPhones, so he only had a number password, and I couldn’t get into his phone, but I am a software developer and knew some things Siri would do even if the phone was locked. I asked Siri to call the last number that had called ‘me’, and the phone started calling his mom. I felt like I hit the lottery. His mom said she didn’t know he was at the hospital the previous night, and that they had permission to take him to the hospital.
This is the craziest part, they wanted to put him on a stretcher to take him to the ambulance, and at that moment he started getting hostile. He didn’t want to be moved, any attempt to move him he would aggressively defend against and sit back down. One of the EMTs had to get a syringe of ketamine, and walked up next to him and stuck him in the arm, with no flinching or fighting at all. We waited about 3 min, then tried to move him again, except this time he was almost like a robot. When they would move him, he would stay in the position they left him. He got lifted into the stretcher but his arms were sticking straight out in front of him, and they put them down like they were putting away a toy. They haul him off and leave my entire office stunned and confused.
A few days go by, nobody has heard from this guy, but his car is still in the parking lot. He finally sends an update in the form of an email to my boss, but not just one email. His first email comes in and explains the situation without too much medical information, but that he would still like to come in and continue working. About 20 min after that, he sends another email with the same explanation paragraph, but the second paragraph was about how he didn’t know if he would be able to work here anymore. It came across as though he had drafted two emails and was deciding which one to send, and ended up sending both.
Days go by, and we were waiting to see what developed, but we eventually sent him a termination notice. Still, his car was there. Weeks went by, we started to assume this guy died, cause who leaves a car for 3 weeks? Then one day, in the middle of the week, the car just disappeared. We speculated for a long time, but never ended up getting closure. The dude spent a grand total of maybe 6 hours as an employee, and eventually ended up being fired because of no-call no-show. We tried to cut him some slack if it was a medical thing, but he didn’t attempt to come in or explain anything past what we already knew.
Idk what happened to you [newguy], but if you’re still out there, you got like 12 people who still to this day wonder what happened to you.
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u/Caviar_Tacos 1d ago
I manage restaurants and had a busser get fired within his first two hours.
His first day was supposed to be shadowing a trainer and he did fine the first hour and we couldn't find him after he went to the restroom.
We found him in the break room where he was drinking a beer that he brought in(he had a few with him). I told him he couldn't drink on the clock and his response was,"well, no one told me I couldn't"
He was gone by hour two when I was able to get his check to him.
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u/06EXTN 1d ago
Hired a helpdesk IT guy. Freshly married, young, and in the process of buying a house. Graduate of a Christian college, churchgoer and all that.
Beginning of his second or third week he was late one day. Like two hours late. No explanation other than he slept in or car trouble or some BS. Well…an hour later he left. Saw him pulling out of the parking lot. Bit later boss tells us he had to be let go.
Turns out he was a former porn addict and had installed web filtering and stuff at his house so he wasn’t tempted. Well he was using the company Citrix to access it that morning and lost track of time wanking. Also, he kept getting web filtering prompts that he was trying to get to a porn site and just kept clicking right thru the warnings and it flagged the network guys attention.
I feel bad cause his life literally fell apart after that. His wife kicked him out of the house and divorced him, they had to cancel buying the house which I thankfully don’t think they’d closed on yet, etc. last I heard he was a project manager or team lead for a roofing company and was remarried with a young kid but this was a decade ago.
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u/Silocon 14h ago
A law firm I used to work for had a filter for adult content... until we got a major porn producer (think Playboy, Hustler etc) as a client. Due to the nature of our work, the attorneys working for that client needed to be able to check other porn sites as well, not just the client's site, so eventually IT just told us "ok. We've turned off the adult content filter and we're gonna trust you guys to use it appropriately."
I suspect they still had monitoring of what we searched, for obvious reasons, but the sites weren't actually blocked and we didn't need to keep emailing IT saying "hey, I need to access Pornhub on my company computer for....uh....reasons."
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u/pollut3r 21h ago
Assistant managed a grocery store deli for about a year or so.
High school girl came in, interviewed, got an offer, accepted, did all the onboarding stuff and then was told she'd get her schedule soon. They scheduled her to start the next Monday... during school hours... specifically when she said she couldn't work. On top of that, they sent the schedule to the wrong email address and she never received it (they confirmed this afterwards).
They called her that Monday when she obviously didn't show up and told her that her offer was no longer on the table. She came in (left school early) just absolutely bawling about it, told them she never received an email and that she said she couldn't work this shift, etc. etc. Store manager didn't give a shit.
My deli manager and I both left not long after that, fuck that place lol
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u/eroticanonimous 18h ago
This is the first one I've seen where the employee in question was entirely in the right!
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u/Midas_Ag 1d ago
Temp's first day there was a group townhall lunch event. He decided to sniff the hair of the lady in front of him and tell her she smelled good. Like straight up stuck his nose in the back of her head,, unprompted. He didn't make it to the end of the day.
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u/chewedgummiebears 1d ago
Worked security, was assigned to train a guy who passed a drug test and background check without issues. On his first break we caught him hitting a THC pen so hard, he got light headed. lost his balance and hurt himself. Fired on the spot then he tried suing for workmans comp.
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u/Absolutedisgrace 1d ago
Our team was still fairly new to the organisation, experienced Power BI people but team itself was only couple of years old. This organisation is a GOC (Government owned corporation). Essentially runs like a private company but doesn't have the full profit 'race to the bottom' culture. Was a pretty good mix of private company culture mixed with government employee culture. Sometimes you did get the worst of both, but mostly good.
We had to interview for a Power BI position but HR did not allow us to ask technical questions because of HR imposed time constraints. The lady we interviewed said all the right things, used all the right words and had all the right things on her CV.
Day 1 i'm taking her through Power BI and its very clear she knows next to nothing. So I pivot into SQL, hoping that its just a "knows the stuff, can learn the tool" problem. Nope, doesn't know SQL. SQL was something she explicitly talked about in the interview as being good at.
Day 3 i'm on the phone to my boss, telling him this isn't going to work. She knows nothing. I've tried every adjacent skill and there is nothing she is capable of doing. His response "No way. I was in that interview. I'll spend tomorrow with her".
Day 4 Boss spends the day with her and confirms that yep, this girl is useless. Contacts HR to start termination. Australia has special rules that lets you terminate people in the first week differently than the first 3 months. HR's response was "Oh.. wow... how'd you work that out so fast... We don't have a procedure for that.... umm maybe you're stuck with her until the end of the probation period?"
Boss gets a very clever idea. We had a job for HR yet to be started. New girl is given that task. She walks down to the head of HR to ask questions about the project. He says "I don't have time, i'm on the phone". She then stands there and waits, in front of him, for his call to end.
Guess who was gone shortly after?
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u/Anon44356 15h ago
I recently switched to a new company, mid sized business, only one other analyst in the organisation - they’ve been there for 6 years. I’ve been hired into essentially an analytics engineer position with a different title.
Thought I could shortcut some access by talking to them directly. Asked them what database they use.
“Oh it’s a bit embarrassing but I don’t use databases and I can’t write SQL”
You fucking WHAT?
Then spoke to the analyst at the customer business. Same thing, no SQL. Asked them for some example data for an upcoming project where they want me to do the analysis for a survey they are sending out. They sent me a fucking pdf print out of the (blank) form they are using for the survey.
On the bright side, I look like an absolute rock star.
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u/1369ic 1d ago
I saw a federal employee get fired while still in processing. They filed the equivalent of an expense account receipt that was clearly fraudulent. They were still in the hotel and he just claimed to have spent the maximum allowable amount on each person for each meal. They had one conversation and he was booking a flight out. He's been there several days, but hadn't actually started what you'd normally consider work.
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u/PurplePickleEater1 1d ago
Guy was hired to operate a forklift. His first day, he walks into the HR's office to start his paperwork reeking of weed. He never got to fill out the paperwork.
The guy he was hired to replace? Fired for being high while driving the forklift. He ran into the side of the warehouse and knocked down the awning above where everyone takes their smoke breaks. Luckily no one was under there.
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u/GlobalizeReconquista 21h ago
Hello, forklift driver here. I don't smoke weed, fairly certain I am the only one in the whole world who doesn't.
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u/According_Stranger43 22h ago
Worked with a pharm tech at a hospital who verbally refused to deliver narcotics to the NICu because he didnt want to "contribute to poisoning babies". He stated he would throw the drugs in the trash if he was forced to. This was among many other quirks. He didnt make it a full week
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u/l_w_88 16h ago
Considers medication for babies in intensive care poisoning, instead of applying that logic to the inverse?
Can't imagine why he didn't last.
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u/Hezzaku 1d ago
I showed the new girl what to do at a grocery store. She was stealing stuff and didnt even make it to the end of her 1st shift.
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u/shidderbean 1d ago
We hired a girl with previous experience doing the thing we needed her to do. She seems like a great candidate, smart, friendly, interviewed well.
Her first day, she gets - I am dead serious - 30 calls from home.
End of the day, we have a talk with her and she assures us that the calls will stop.
The next day she's got 10 calls before lunch. The CEO says to patch in the next call for her to him.
It was her fucking freak-show methhead boyfriend.
CEO tells him the calls have to stop if new girl's going to keep her job, shit gets ugly.
15 minutes later methhead boyfriend shows up with a fucking gun at our building screaming for CEO. Methhead boyfriend didn't know CEO was an ex marine and packed heat in his desk. He'd been waiting for his moment.
Thankfully the cops get there before our CEO decides to handle this guy himself. (Turns out the cops respond quickly when you're working in a rich neighborhood and say a dude with a gun is at your doors)
Girl was fired same day. Don't track shit into your workplace, kids.
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u/soyel_cerdo 22h ago
That’s more sad for the poor girl
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u/OnTheEveOfWar 21h ago
That was my first thought. Probably an abusive boyfriend and she didn’t really have a choice to answer the calls because she knew he would do some crazy shit if she didn’t.
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u/Mean_Parsnip 1d ago
I worked at restaurant that had servers sit down with potential server canidates. I really liked this interview process as it gave someone who works there a chance to see if they will vibe with the rest of the staff.
We had a guy that had a great interview with the manager, they alluded to the fact that they wanted to hire him. The first server sent over to chat sits down and dude says, Hey what is the scam situation here? The server sent over, stood up and walked into the manager's office and vetoed him for being a scammer.
He went from an almost job to blacklisted in 10 seconds.
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u/jacobr1020 1d ago
Brand new coworker did good on her first day but then right as she clocked out at the end of her shift, her ex-boyfriend came in.
The two started loudly screaming and yelling at each other and creating a scene.
Our manager went up to them to get them to stop and co-worker shoved her and yelled at her to STFU and mind her own business.
Instant firing.
Then the next day, she had the nerve to beg and plead for her job back. Manager pretty much told her to go to hell.
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u/Ant10102 1d ago
Not day one but one guy got fired for trying to get with a client. I work in social services, he lasted a month. Another guy not cut out for the work because the kids couldnt listen to songs with the n word in it but said the word and hes white saying it in front of a bunch of black teens. He wasnt all there
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u/RilohKeen 21h ago
I was giving a new hire a tour of the store. I showed him the cardboard baler, which is a hydraulic press that flattens cardboard boxes into a cube for recycling. On the front of the baler is a huge sticker that has an image of a hand with the fingers getting chopped off and blood spraying out and it says DO NOT PUT HANDS THROUGH GRATING. I told him, “the baler is one of the few things in this building that could easily kill you, so use it carefully and never take any shortcuts. Never put your hands anywhere near the grating, and never reach inside unless the gate is up and it’s powered off. If anything at all doesn’t seem right with it, call a Lead.”
He smiled and said, “oh, so it’s a bad idea to do this?” and stuck his fingers through the grating on the front. I hit the emergency stop on the baler and said, “ok, I don’t think this job is going to be a good fit for you,” and that was his first and last day.
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u/ThePowerfulPaet 1d ago
Me working at Amazon, though technically I quit by auto-termination. I lasted 3 days.
It was 11 hour straight shifts standing in one place packing boxes. I was extremely sedentary back then and my feet felt like they were slammed into wheat thresher.
I couldn't even get past the physical pain to get to the soul crushing mental part of it. No idea how someone could ever do something so mind-numbing unless they quite literally had no other choice, which I do realize is often the case.
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u/WardenWolf 1d ago
I have issues with my feet. Even with custom orthotics, I really either need to be moving or sitting; standing in one place is killer.
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u/Equivalent-Battle973 23h ago
It has always blown my mind that sitting down to work was viewed as being lazy. I used to work at jewel, and standing for horus without being able to sit till my break was absolutely stupid. Like who the fuck cares if the work gets done...
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u/gigashadow89 1d ago
I worked as a forklift operator for a while during covid. We had been trying to find drivers for the holiday season and got one in for training. On his very first day everything seemed to be going well, he showed aptitude, he was good and smooth with the controls. It seemed like he would be a good fit.... up until he crashed into an overhead belt taking half the belt system out forcing us to shut down two lines for a week while they repaired it.
He never came back after that first day.
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u/phil33mc 1d ago
I worked as a telemarketer to help pay my way through college. We would try to guess who wouldn’t come back after lunch their first day on the phones. People are mean to telemarketers and you had to give 3 attempts (hear no 3 times) or were reprimanded. I bet it was 25% the first day and 50% the first month. But it paid well for a college job and had lots of cool perks like bonus for meeting quotas and free meals when the team did well.
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u/slit-wrist-syndrome 1d ago
I did a lot of years in call centers and those stats are pretty spot on. Once you make it past the first paycheck, then it's the count to 90 days. Once you're past 3 months, you're a "lifer". Glad that phase of my life is over, for now at least.
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u/brother_bart 1d ago
I wouldn’t last in that job five minutes. I am too fully invested in the idea that “no” means “no”— in any and every aspect of life. Forcing people to hound others for pay when someone has already said “no” is just fucking unethical.
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u/OkMushroom364 1d ago
In Finland its illegal for telemarketers to continue once they hear no, if they try to continue you can report them and the company could get fined or sued for it and lose their license
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u/shidderbean 1d ago edited 1d ago
My brief time in telemarketing (6 weeks back in 2001 - i was basically a grizzled veteran by the time I left) the metrics they tried to hold people to were the most absurdly unrealistic standards I think could've existed for a job with like a 0.01% actual conversion rate. They wanted 60-something percent of calls to end in a fully closed sale. EVERYONE there relied on trickery and doublespeak to close and I think about 95% of calls that 'converted' were dropped in the commit phase when they forwarded over to the person entering the actual subscriptions.
Easily the most toxic workplace I've ever worked in as well. I don't know what the hell possesses people to do that other than raw desperation (the only reason I was there, before I decided being homeless was better than suffering another shift of that)
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u/Substantial_Army_639 1d ago
Double wammy on this one, worked at a Daycare for a few years, got a new director, about a week later she hired a girl and immediately stuck her in a room with me, girl proceeded to sexually assault me in front of some kids with in 30 to 40 minutes of the shift, I go to the director and file a complaint, the director asks me if I would have complained if the girl wasn't fat. Contacted HR immediately.
HR sees that this girl was hired immediately and put in a room with kids, so obviosly no one waited for the background check to get back. Girl was currently facing charges that required the state to take her kids. So I saw a girl get fired about 2 or 3 hours into her shift, and the director was fired at the end of the day.
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u/WardenWolf 1d ago
Holy cow, that director should have known better. He went from on top to losing his whole career in one line.
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u/marinerNA 1d ago
I had to fire a kid from a summer camp on day 2. He was fine during his first day then we got calls from the other on site staff that he was sexually harassing 2 of the others staffers. We decided to just cut our losses and kicked him out the next morning.
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u/OhEyeSeaWorkerBee 1d ago
Me when I was 18 and got a job at a gas station over the summer. First day barely any training, but someone comes in wanting cigarettes. I recognized him from school he was a year or so younger than me, and active in JROTC and police explorers. I refused to sell him cigarettes as he had no ID and I knew he was under 18. Boss yells at me to sell to him, I still say no. Boss then sells him cigarettes. Busted, it was something the police explorers did. I wasn’t in trouble with the law, but fired for some reason. Went back to being a waitress.
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u/haushinkadaz 1d ago
First day of training in a fully remote job, disappeared during several training calls. Turned out they’d answered the door and were sat talking to visitors all whilst supposed to be learning the job. Lasted half a day.
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u/ImprovementFar5054 23h ago
We had a guy show up drunk on day 1. Said he drank to calm the first day jitters. Covered the last day jitters too.
Two birds, one stone.
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u/kayleigh_emo 1d ago
When I worked in the nightclub a new barman on his first day was told to “take one for yourself” generally this means you add £2 to the bill and pop it in your tips, this boy genuinely poured himself a vodka and coke and drank it 😂😂😂 didn’t last the shift. If I was supervisor/manager I’d have sent him home but told him he can’t do that. Personally the one training him failed him
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u/iSoReddit 1d ago
was told to “take one for yourself” generally this means you add £2 to the bill and pop it in your tips,
If no one had told me that I’d have assumed was being told to have a drink
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u/kayleigh_emo 1d ago
Yeah, the person training him should’ve explained that. I’d have given him another shot as it was a simple misunderstanding that should’ve been outlined. His trainer failed him
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u/Ocarina-of-lies 1d ago
Well....some bars let the bartender drink too. But, thats definitely something that can't just be assumed
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u/shinygoldhelmet 1d ago
Yeah I had this in a pub in England. 'And one yersel' (in lieu of cash tip) meant keep a tally of drinks bought for you and at the end of the night you could drink them during clean up.
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u/nun_gut 1d ago
I definitely did not wait until the end of the night for mine back in the day :)
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u/thedeclineirl 1d ago
I was the IT guy, gave a new field sales rep his laptop and trained him up on Monday. On Friday his manager gave the laptop back to me. He'd been caught speeding in the his new company car, giving him enough points to lose his licence. No license, no Job. New policy on fully clean driving licences for new hires.
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u/Lucky_Foam 1d ago
Few hours.
New guy showed up. After a few hours he was called down to security to get his badge.
The new guy asked the two black people working security "why do black people have weird sounding names?"
He was fired on the spot and escorted out.
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u/ChaoticGoodMrdrHobo 1d ago
Guy got fired before he even got to clock in on day 1. He showed up for the interview 15 minutes late, apologized and said things were chaotic that morning. “It won’t happen again.” I let it slide, stuff happens.
Day one he’s 35 minutes. “Traffic was horrible.”
He lived less than a mile away. Told him not to bother to clock in, we didn’t need him.
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u/terrendos 1d ago
My first "real" job out of college was at a place that required a background check and drug testing, which I knew going in (they were very up front about it during the interview process). I started the same day as two other new hires; we all filled out the start paperwork together, etc. One guy went to a different group, and I started chatting with the other guy. He said he'd moved from several states away to take this job and was looking forward to it.
Anyway, he wasn't there on my second day. And at the staff meeting the day after, my new boss gave the whole group a "reminder" that the company had a zero tolerance policy for drugs and conducted regular random and for-cause drug testing.
So yeah, one day.
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u/Sad_Listen6607 1d ago
About 15 minutes. Guy showed up drunk, was being shown how to use a machine, alcohol was on his breath, and he was punted.
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u/nomadnomor 1d ago
they were hired, went into the saw room and stuck their finger in a saw to see if it was running ... it was
total time ..... about 10 minutes from hired to fired