My hair has been slowly turning gray for years. In the meantime, the non-gray areas are turning dark and lacking color.

I was looking at pictures of myself from less than 4 yrs ago and I looked so nice compared to now. I booked an appointment tomorrow to get my hair colored to what it was four years ago. It is not a huge change, but definitely nicer.

However, my lifestyle these days is pretty much not dressy at all. In fact, my hair is usually in a pony tail. I work from home so I do not even see anyone much. When I do see others, I am out exercising or shopping or something, meaning, I generally just pull my hair back.

I am back pedaling on getting my hair colored now. Maybe I need to embrace my color and just stick to a hair cut. Any advice or experience? Part of me thinks it could be fun because my hair used to be reddish brown and might be fun to do that one last time before I go completely gray, but another part of me thinks it is a huge waste and I would not go back to do the roots. It would be a one time thing. I just am not dressing up to go out anymore.

I've gotten into a real funk. I was sort of forced into retiring and after the 1st year or so, I'm struggling a lot. Everything seems so monotonous, and at the end of the day I can't even tell you what I did. I piddle around, work on some school work (finishing my degree online). I don't have children so no grandchildren to hang with and I have just a few close friends who still work. My husband still works and honestly, he's a quiet homebody and doesn't want to go out or do much on weekends. I need some ideas on how to get some excitement back into my life --- something to do to make me feel alive again. I volunteer 1 or 2 days a week, so that's covered. Any ideas?

I am 55 y/o.  My husband and I own our own business that is successful enough to put food on our table and keep a roof over our head, plus a little more.

I don't like travel.  I don't like hobbies.  I like books but the print is getting awfully small, even with reading glasses.  I don't "game".

At work, I have almost nothing to do.  My husband says I could think of marketing ideas but I literally have none.

I am on antidepressant medication and have been for 30 years.

I am not "in a bad mood" all the time.  Not at all.  I'm easy enough to get along with. I just feel dead and pointless inside.  When I was younger I thought all the effort - all of "it" - was FOR something.  But I realize it's not.  It's for nothing.

I have one friend but I have a hard time keeping friends because they are mostly boring, and so am I.

I am lucky, right?  Boredom is a luxury many people in the world may never enjoy.  I write in a gratitude journal every day to remind myself how fortunate I am.

I expect to be alive another couple decades at least and, once we have to retire, I fear for my sanity.

Has anybody ever overcome what I am describing?  If so, how?  (Volunteer opportunities where I live are only during my own working hours, so that's out for now.)

EDIT: Thank you so much, everyone, for your practical suggestions. I have a few good ideas to get me moving. xo

Further edit: I live rurally. Our libraries close at dinner time. I'm under license suspension due to seizures. Our small community has a volunteer bulletin board and ALL opportunities posted (humane society, food banks, etc.) are for weekdays (when I'm at work) only.

Let me begin by saying I have a DR appt scheduled this week on Friday.

For the past 6 weeks I have noticed that sometimes I get shortness of breath walking from my main floor to my upstairs. And sometimes it happens carrying groceries from the car into the house. And sometimes it happens when I'm working out at the gym. It's accompanied by a racing heart beat. Then after 30-60 seconds I recover and I'm fine.

I'm 59F and otherwise healthy. I'm not overweight, I'm active during the day - I love walks, gym 2-3 times a week, my apple watch tells me I'm averaging 8,600 steps per day in 2026.

Anyway, ever since I called my DR office an hour ago and they told me to come in this week, I've been really scared. Maybe it's something dumb, but I just don't know why this is happening to me. I'm WFH today and now I can't work at all.....

My oldest is 35. She got an opportunity for a job in Europe and enthusiastically took the job; she's been there now for about 6 or 7 weeks seeing it as an opportunity to travel, and experience something different. It's a one year contract with possibility for renewal. She is single, no children.

It's apparent that beyond the initial excitement of the first couple of weeks, she's struggling. Today was the second time she called me talking about being lonely and unable to meet people or make friends. She's in a fairly large city so it's not surprising; big cities can be harder that way. Many of her co-workers are older or in relationships. And if they are struggling too, they aren't talking to her about it.

I've suggested things like taking yoga classes, joining a gym, various activities to meet people. She just says that she's too tired when she's not working to even put in the effort. I suspect just the whole process of moving, all her paperwork and getting used to thing is overwhelming her.

I honestly don't know how to support her through this. All I'm doing so far is listening and if she asks for ideas I may give some but she's too far away and there's really not much I can do to help her out. I feel helpless. I've tried to be encouraging and make myself available for phone calls. I worry because she's on her own and she seems to be hesitant to make the first move with people.

Has anyone experienced this with adult children? How do you support them?

After a recent small cold/runny nose, sore throat; I noticed I can no longer sing in my upper ranges. I was never going to be considered a great singer, but I miss the loss of range!

Is this normal with aging? No more karaoke or belting out silly songs for my dog?

I'm looking for an indoor bike that I can use with a couple of age and injury-related limitations in my neck and knees. I loved my elliptical but it's too big to move anymore. I'd love to hear what bike you use and why you love it. I'm interested in muscle strength and a little cardio. Budget isn't my main consideration and I see a lot of them of FB marketplace, so I'm open to new or used. Thanks ladies!

I’ve recently developed a new pain. Sigh. If I sit for too long on a soft surface, my hip and thigh get so painful when I try to stand or walk. Just my right leg, oddly. But it’s so painful, I can hardly walk across the room. I don’t have the problem sitting in a dining room chair, just a comfy couch or armchair. Any suggestions? I tried a firm support pillow, but that doesn’t help. I’ve been doing hip stretches and leg exercises. They don’t make a difference either. I’m not sure what I can do besides set recurring reminders to stand up.

Update: thank you everyone – a card it is! I also love the idea of donating to a charity and/or vintage pictures. Thanks again 🙂

My husband and I are attending a fairly casual 50th anniversary party. The children of the couple are paying for meals and drinks. The invitation says no gifts. Do people really not take a gift to something like this? I might normally take a bottle of wine or something like that but the couple does not really drink very much. I will be seeing the wife next Monday, two weeks before the party. Would it be appropriate to take something to her instead of to the party? I’m really stumped here ladies!

I realize there's a few subs I could post to, however I'm hoping this subreddit is the most appropriate for receiving genuine answers.

Last night I went out and told my mother that I was going out (we live in different cities). She never asks if I have weekend plans, where I'm going, how it was, etc. but I tell her I'm going out so she doesn't assume I'm at home, depressed & rearranging my living room for the nth time. I swear to god that ever since she retired, her behavior has become something else entirely and I wasn't prepared for it.

If I mention going out, she expects a text when I've arrived back home. I try to comply as best I can but I'm only human. Especially because every time I've forgotten, I've woken up to a few texts asking if I'm OK and even a phone call/voice mail, if I don't respond to those texts. We're Hispanic and that behavior is somewhat of a cultural thing, unfortunately.

Well, last night I inadvertently forgot to send an "I'm home" text. Life happens. This morning I sent her a text and in her reply, she mentioned that she was worried because I hadn't sent her a text when I got home last night. She's never awake when I get home. She also would have seen that I read her last text to me at 0330 on Sunday morning, indicating I was alive. My response was that maybe I was getting laid or doing something that I didn't want her knowing about, and I was getting tired of her panicking as if I was wild child who was known to go on benders and disappear.

Her response was one line: "Sorry, I won't ask again" and that irritated me.

Part of my anger is because of her intense interest in when I've arrived back home and having stuff all interest in my personal life. A few weeks ago, I went to a speed dating event and she never said good luck or asked how it went - just wanted to know when I got home.

My whole life has been spent having to hear about relatives and her friend's children graduating, reproducing, getting married, etc. and meanwhile I'm the virginal monster creature of a daughter collecting dust on the shelf? She's never asked if I've had a boyfriend, asked to see my degrees, what my job interviews are like, wanted to be married, have children, what I do at my job, what possible hopes & dreams I might have in my autism-addled brain? I've begged her to ask and she won't - you'd think it was beneath her to show interest in her own daughter's life. Meanwhile her perfect grandkids are perfect, and I have to hear allll about their amazing (!) accomplishments.

I've tried talking to her, however it's frustrating and usually ends in tears. She unfortunately is the sort of person who thinks they're being degraded when confronted by their own behavior & words. Zero accountability and quick to start with the tears and counter-accusations.

I am attending my 40th high school reunion next week. The theme is Old Skool 80s and it is a bbq at a classmate’s home.

What should my hubby and I wear?

EDIT to add: I'm in Canada

I'm an active 61-year-old who's been struggling with metatarsal foot pain. I finally found plush, cushiony pain relief in my Hoka Bondi 9 sneakers (although I still need to use the occasional metatarsal pad too).

I have been living in my Bondis and love how soft they are! But I'd also like to wear something besides sneakers. Is that possible? Any suggestions for shoe brands that offer comfortable, wide toe-box fall booties? I also used to love wearing low-heeled riding boots in the fall--not sure that there's a cushiony, wide toe-box option out there? I use a custom orthotic for my high arches, too. This weekend I picked up a pair of Skechers Cozy Weather 2 booties--they're fairly comfy, but they still can't approach the feel of the Bondis. Thanks for any suggestions!

I’ve noticed over the last few years that people aren’t sending thank-you notes anymore.

I would say the last 5-6 weddings where I’ve given a gift and a least a few funerals I provided cash for a memorial, there’s not been an acknowledgement, let alone a note of a appreciation. I was taught differently. Have times changed that much?

I just clicked over from the dark side of 60 to the land of 70 year olds but I need to reach people who still drive just fine. I drive out of town on a monthly basis and I return at night most often. I'm 5'4" tall and I love to drive my Honda Civic but they're such low-slung cars which make it hard to see over the dashboard and hood.

At night when I'm driving, especially in areas with no street lights, I'm having difficulty seeing medians and other low objects. I keep my headlights polished up to be as clear as possible but I think it's time for a seat cushion to boost me up just a few inches higher in the seat.

Has anyone found what is basically an adult booster pillow that might help me to sit taller in my car's leather seat? I've seen some that are particularly for alleviating pain when sitting down but I don't think they're what I need.

Thanks in advance for your suggestions.

UPDATE: Sorry that I didn't include that I get my vision checked every year and I specifically ask if I have cataracts. So far I don't have cataracts.

Also, my 2018 Honda Civic has seats that move every which way except UP. People who suggest getting a different car, I have one answer: have any of you looked at prices for cars, new or used, in 2026?? In this economy??

"Many young parents are raising children in households where both parents work, childcare is enormously expensive, and they’re exhausted," Sayan told Newsweek. "They naturally look to their parents for help. Meanwhile, their parents may have a completely different vision of what this stage of life should look like." Sayan described a push-and-pull relationship between boomer parents and their children: One generation is saying, "We need you." The other is saying, "We’ve already done our part."

As a biological parent of 2 grown adults who will not be having children, i am perplexed by the automatic expectations of the younger generations for their parents to help with their kids. Are we not our own individuals with our own schedules, plans, agendas?

Greetings All! I wanted to ask if any of you have or had any problems with yeast infections on your external skin? If so, do you have any recommendations for helping prevent it?

I'm 64 and a doctor prescribed me some anti-yeast cream and told me to put tissues in the areas (like under my belly fold) in order to keep it dry.

I just wondered if anyone had a much neater trick. Thanks in advance!

62 F with female twin. At this age we have once again had a falling out and not spoken in months. This is our history.
I have a wonderful relationship with her daughters and it seems when she and I fall out they disappear from my life.
I recently stopped doing social media after this last time due to constant posts from them and their life. It makes me sad to see when I’m not part of anything they do.
I have tried to give life support to this very trying relationship my whole life. She is not extremely bothered either way. How do you really accept when enough is enough and you no longer have the energy to support a very unhealthy dialogue with your twin.
I feel sad but I’m so tired of beating my head against the wall.

I get my roots done and my hair cut every 5 weeks. Lately I’m noticing lots of grey areas at the crown and toward the back of my head at the 2-3 weeks mark. I touch up with the Clairol root powder, but does anyone have any other ideas? I definitely am not ready to let it grow totally grey.

My total testosterone just tested at 71. According to the chart that is high. What is everyone else's? I take bioidentical hormones and compound testosterone.

Hi guys! I [35F] am looking for a red light mask for myself but then I thought I also want to get one for my mom. I just started looking into them so still doing research but I wanted to ask if you guys have recommendations for anything specific. My mom always used to be really into skincare growing up but recently she stopped. I want to help her get back into a self care regiment and looking for ways to do that. She also has arthritis.

Would love to hear your recommendations on red light masks or anything else that would help her take care of herself more.

Hello there. I hope this is not an insensitive question. I could do with any pearls of wisdom and I'd be ever so grateful for insights, experience, perspective.

My husband and I got married last year because he was diagnosed in 2024 with advanced cancer. We had only been together for 2 years before his diagnosis and had only just moved in together. I'm 41, he's 45. He's the love of my life and I never really knew one person could become everything to me.

Found out today his 3rd line chemo never worked so they're moving him onto last ditch chemo that barely ever works. Neither of us have any hope and we knew this day would come, but it's a heavy surreal heartbreaking time. We never had children, we discussed fostering at some point but when he dies I will be alone in a rental, unemployed and I don't know how to face it.

If any of you have any experience of spousal loss and widowhood when you were younger, I'd so appreciate hearing how you got through it intact, how you faced the loss, how you are now, how you coped with the illness and passing. I'm sorry if it is too personal a question. I'm desperate for any words that will make life feel possible after loss. Thank you

Happy Friday you great bunch of women over 60 who spread kindness, knowledge and empathy in this group so much positivity is exactly what I need and I come here and find it every time!!