it was for the best, they understood, but i still hate myself for it

There was not one person willing to help me- not doctors, not teachers, not any family members. I am alone.

The only person that would be bothered by my suicide would be my mother(even tho when I OD, she only brought me juice and left me there).

I recently read a post about someone trying to kill themselves and his father beat him up. I know it's abusive and I shouldn't be jealous over this, but I can't control this- I am. There is no one for me and there won't be.

One time my favorite teacher gave me a zero on an assignment because she thought I was cheating. I never did the rest of her assignments after that

the self awareness is there at least