"Records are made to be broken." - Anthony Scaramucci, on Katie Zacharia's firing.
Workin' Nine To Bye
Donald Trump fired White House Press Secretary Katie Zacharia just five days after she started, setting a new speed record for failing out of his administration.
Success isn’t the only way to make a name for yourself. A “Scaramucci” still means “11 days” to everyone in D.C. politics, as a reference to the time it took for Anthony Scaramucci to spectacularly flame out from his job as President Donald Trump’s White House communications director in 2017. Today, a new term was coined: a “Zacharia.” It’s even shorter, barely a workweek long.
The White House booted Press Secretary Katie Zacharia only five days after she replaced Karoline Leavitt — less than half a Scaramucci. Or, technically, 5/11ths, meaning 0.4545 x Scaramucci. (Questions are now being raised on social media over whether the last day should count as only one half, given that she was out by lunchtime. If so, that would make her tenure 4.5/11ths. Also, Monday was a federal holiday. We may need an instant replay! Call in a robo-ump!)
Whatever the exact number, this revolving door turned at warp speed for good reason: It shows just how much the White House is sweating the midterms. This administration has endured a lot of mediocrity. But with less than three weeks to go, and control of Congress on the line, Trumpworld can’t afford to let this press secretary debacle dominate the headlines any longer than it has to.
Zacharia was doomed from the beginning. A former Trump Media adviser with minimal public speaking experience, Zacharia appeared visibly rattled during her first (and only) press conference on Tuesday morning. She took only three questions, prioritizing conservative outlets, and ended the briefing within minutes.
Zacharia blamed her bungled performance on staffers who didn’t prepare her well-enough, as well as first day jitters. She offered that bizarre defense last night to Fox News’ Sean Hannity, whose tone implied that he believed this lady shouldn’t be within 100 miles of the White House podium. “I feel like I did my very best,” Zacharia told Hannity.
Then there was the whole “lawyer” thing. Zacharia spent years claiming to be a lawyer, only to admit sheepishly this week that she never passed the bar exam. On her first day, she claimed to have done legal work in China, and went on to insist, bizarrely, that while she couldn’t call herself an “attorney,” she had been advised that “lawyer” was accurate. (Note: This is not a thing!)
She only made matters worse in another Fox & Friends interview this morning. When a Fox host asked if she wished she’d disclosed the failed exam to Trump before being hired, Zacharia responded: “Those questions weren’t asked. I’m being hired as White House press secretary, and not White House counsel.”
Even Trump admitted that he messed up by choosing Zacharia.
Zacharia’s demise seemed imminent from the moment she stepped down from the podium this week. The question was always how fast she’d be kicked to the curb. The call came shortly after Trump told reporters this morning that he had asked Zacharia if she actually wants the job.
“Honestly, if I were you, I’d reconsider,” Trump recalled telling her. “Katie, do you need this? I don’t think you need this.” (Translation: You’re fired!)
It takes a lot for someone to be fired in Trumpworld. Hell, Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth still has a job even after Trump nixed his ludicrous plan to livestream the firing-squad execution of a man in a wheelchair.
But this week has been jam-packed with scandals even by Trump’s standards. With midterms right around the corner, Zacharia chose a bad time to make a fool of herself — and the president seems to have an easier time firing women, anyways.
“Records are made to be broken. But I take no pleasure in other people’s pain,” Scaramucci tweeted today.
Meanwhile On The Pod...
Billionaires Are Flooding Republican Campaigns With Secret Money (10/15/26)
Look No Further Than Crooked Media
Is it possible some of the South will flip blue? No matter what happens in the midterms, we'll have a lot to make sense off. So, we've asked our Southern experts, Errin Haines and Jennifer Palmieri to join us at Crooked Con, just days after the midterms!
They will be hosting their very first LIVE episode of Long Play in Washington D.C. on Saturday, November 7!
The Long Play live show is included in your all-day Crooked Con ticket! Check out the line-up and get your tickets now at https://crookedcon.com.
What Else?
Dozens of Israeli settlers attacked a Washington Post photojournalist and Palestinians in the West Bank, setting olive groves on fire during locals’ autumn harvest. The journalist, who was wearing a vest with “PRESS” on the front and back, was “knocked to the ground, kicked repeatedly and stripped of her cameras and phone,” the Post writes. She was later taken to a local hospital. The video is chilling.
Broligarch Elon Musk sent $158 million last month to a super PAC backing Ken Paxton’s Senate bid against Democrat James Talarico in Texas, according to fresh federal filings. His donations have allowed Paxton to remain competitive, despite Talarico raising way more money. Ah, democracy. When a trillionaire can slap down that credit card and bid for a senator!
Speaking of Elon’s Big Supervillain Energy, someone inside the White House ordered the Pentagon to limit Ukraine’s access to Starshield, the military division of Musk’s Starlink satellite service, Reuters reports. Trump has grown frustrated with Ukraine, after the country continued striking Russia this week. “Zelenskyy is not a good guy for us to deal with,” Trump told Newsmax. “I’m not a big fan of Zelenskyy. They’ve destroyed that country.” Excuse me? Ukraine destroyed Russia?
Trump aides Stephen Miller, Bill Pulte, and Lee Zeldin are jostling to become the next White House chief of staff, amid rumors that Susie Wiles might resign or be replaced after the midterms, the Post reports. One funny piece of this drama: After Politico reported that Trump was thinking about replacing Wiles, Natalie Harp reportedly printed out the story for Trump, which triggered a “freakout.”
Trump allies are openly discussing the possibility that Trump could declare martial law during the midterms. During a video call on right-wing platform Rumble in September, Peter Ticktin, a lawyer for election denier Tina Peters, told MAGA activists that “there would have to be martial law in the event... [of] another rigged election.” Great! Martial law! Just in time for Thanksgiving!
Trump officials reportedly investigated Rep. Ilhan Omar (D-MN) for fraud during his first term, but didn’t find any evidence of wrongdoing. “I think her citizenship is solid and there wasn’t any fraud there,” a former official familiar with Trump’s first investigation told the Post.
A Great Depression-era mini-golf course in Washington, D.C. might be collateral damage as Trump tries to reshape the city’s public (full-size) golf course to his liking. This is a great article about the history of the mini-golf course, which I had no idea existed. You know where to find me this weekend!
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Light At The End...
A New Zealand museum published dozens of photos of Nikumaroro, the Pacific atoll where aviator Amelia Earhart is believed to have crash-landed, from 1938. One Earhart investigator described the batch of photos as a “goldmine” that could help provide clues about her disappearance.
Somehow I missed news of the annual Damariscotta Pumpkinfest and Regatta this week. If you’re unfamiliar, locals carve out massive pumpkins, sit inside them, and use kayak paddles to race each other down a river. The race featured people dressed as wizards, a man in a Barnacle Boy costume, and a Dolly Parton-themed vessel, among other incredible works of pumpkin art.
A 4-year-old poodle-husky mix named LouLou was rescued from the side of an icy mountain in Alaska this week after surviving an avalanche. Two hikers, who were with LouLou were swept 500 feet off a mountain ridge, survived with serious injuries. LouLou was tracked down using an AirTag. “She’s amazing,” one of the hiker’s girlfriends said. “She appears to have broken a toe and a canine tooth. She’s enjoying the couch and naps. Otherwise back to normal.” The video of her rescue is heartwarming.
A bear broke into a library in California and helped itself to snacks, including peanut butter, peach cups, cookies and a jar of honey, according to the library, which posted a video of the thief on Facebook. “Satiated, the bear then took a full tour of the library, perusing the new releases and inspecting the reference desk before, evidently content with its visit, letting itself out and departing for the day,” the post reads. “No shelves were toppled and no books were harmed, though the honey jar has not been returned at time of publication.”
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