r/GirlDinnerDiaries • u/immaterialgrl Dip Diva • 13h ago
FML walked out of a date after 5 minutes
matched with this guy and he asked me out on a date so we agreed on a location which is a very popular food area after work but not the exact place we were gonna go.
when we got there he suggested this takeout bento place, i don’t like getting takeout for a first date so i said i always love going to this other restaurant (not too expensive like around $30) and he said more reason to try something new. i was like well i have tried the place he suggested before (and i genuinely wouldn’t go again, the food was not very good) but he didn’t get the hint and i didn’t want to push it so i was like ok fine whatever.
at the bento place it is a like pick your food, pay, and sit at the sitting area kinda situation. because i don’t really like the food there i was taking a few minutes to choose what i wanted to get. after a bit i was like oh let me ask my date what he’s getting. then i look around and he’s nowhere to be found, until i saw that he was already at the counter paying for his food? and without telling me at all he went to find a table to sit down.
okay so first of all i do think the man should pay for dates. i don’t do 50/50, and for context this guy works in finance so he’s not broke and the bentos were like $10. that being said, i wouldn’t walk out on a date just because of this because i know it’s really rude (it just means no 2nd date).
however, even with a platonic friend where we are splitting, i would not go pay and sit down without waiting for my friend to finish picking their food or at least i would inform them first so they are not confused as to where i am.
i was really baffled by the lack of basic manners of this guy. so i weighed my options: i could spend my money on this mid bento box that i wouldn’t enjoy with this guy what doesn’t have any courtesy OR i could go eat the food i wanted to eat in the first place and have a better time.
tbh i feel like i should’ve just left without telling him like he went to pay without telling me but i do have manners so i told him i don’t think that we are a good match and left to go get barbecue. it was a lot better than the bento! i also felt very empowered to know that if a date isn’t going well i can just leave as i have definitely stayed on dates for too long as i felt pressured to be nice and polite.
bbq i had instead of the bento!
69
u/Big-History-8457 APPROVED✨ 12h ago
You need to change your attitude about a man paying for a date, at least the first few. Many men think you are then under obligation to them because they paid. He was, indeed, rude for not waiting for you. But it's never a good idea to have the man pay for a meal on a first date. You were right to leave because he would not listen to you and wait for you or let me know he was going to sit down. But you need to change your attitude and reasoning about paying.