Carbon is not braindead. If anything It’s one of the harder weapons in the game.

”Carbon keeps deleting me out of nowhere!!!!!1111!1!1!”

Dude.

The WHOLE POINT of rollers is that they hide and delete you out of nowhere. Shut the fuck up and actually play the game correctly instead of whining about it you fucks.

It pisses me off so much when a sploosh or enperry whips out their special and cap a zone and get a wipeout in one move

Like genuinely how like sometimes a damn .52 is easier to deal with (only sometimes)

(i lost a series to this so thats why)

What the literal fuck is wrong with players on this current junction rota!?

Seriously, is easy as shit. We have shooter, dually shooter, boom gun, and floppy floppy fun range laser.

Only at 580 and it has been an absolute slog with you 400peggers, bitch ass fucking useless where am I players, how does grillers work lazy little twats!

What in the absolute fuck are you all doing?!?!

Ffs.

This is why kills don't matter, cause while they are focusing on two people not even near the rainmaker, our other two teammates are pushing the objective. Kills don't win you the game people.

I'm fuming. At the very least, the hit box should be decided by the ATTACKERS screen and not the RECEIVER. look me dead in the eyes and tell me that burst bomb only did 25

crazy how when im the one with the shooter/dualies everything gets cleaned up and goes fine

then suddenly in the round where im the one who gets the sniper everything goes to shit, like do we forget that mobile weapons can ink the map ? like pls i need support. and if you have a shooter please get the fishsticks swarming the basket like hello ?? uhhuhfbhdhshggggggdgsgg

I’m starting to think it’s my internet even though speed test says 600mb down and 30mb upload 😭

DONT YOU DARE GIVE ME ANY SHIT LIKE “oh you’re just using a weapon that isn’t ideal for clam blitz use this instead!☺️” FUCK YOU CLAM BLITZ ITS WAY TOO PUNISHING AND POINTS ARE SCORED WAY TOO FUCKING QUICKLY ITS LIKE TURF WAR BUT YOU ACTUALLY GET PUNISHED FOR CARRYING YOUR TEAM FUCK YOU CLAM BLITZ I HATE YOU I HATE YOU FUCK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

”just don’t play the mode then…” FUCK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU AGGGGGGGHHHHH

Edit:I played some death stranding to calm down, but damn, this game honestly feels like a toxic relationship sometimes. I feel like every day im chasing the one perfect wipeout just for the day to end with AT MOST a 24-20 Win loss ratio

Y'all are genuinely abysmal to play against like holy shit 🫩 Dropping ranks just cause you're bored of X rank is so corny. Spamming bombs, somehow having ink armor despite having zero resistance chunks equipped. Like I'm convinced I'm playing against hackers, or y'all are just genuinely unemployed as fuck and play nothing but Splatoon 😭

PLEASE OH PLEASE DO YO HAVE NO EYES OR WHY DO YOU ONLY EVER PAINT ONE ZONE WHEN THERE ARE TWO ZONES.

I will be fighting for my life with my inkbrush dodging, painting, dodging, maybe I can even take down 2 enemies and I'll be like "surely my team can handle the rest" and maybe they can but what apparently PAINTING THE SECOND ZONE IS OPTIONAL.

Example Lemuria Hub, not the worst two zones map, not the best either, I tried to push, meanwhile all the other three people were stacked on top of each other in the furthest corner of our base.

PLEASE STOP BEING SCARED OF THE OBJECTIVE,

GET ON THE TOWER, PAINT THE ZONES, GRAB THE RAINMAKER BUT PLEEEASE PUSH FOR THE OBJECTIVE PLEAAAAAAAAASE

I boot up Splatoon 3 after a long day, yeah? I then begin to lose EVERY MATCH I ENTERED, EVEN SALMON RUN! THERE WAS THIS BLASTER IN MANTA MARIA, ALWAYS PISSING ME OFF. YES HE IS EASY TO KILL, BUT THE AEROSPRAY IS EVEN WORSE. ONE INVADES THE BASE, AND ALL OF A SUDDEN, EVERYONE WALKS IN LIKE A RESTAURANT CLOSING IN 2 MINUTES!!! I EXITED THE LOBBY WANTING TO MAKE THEM EAT THEIR OWN ORGANS!

THE MODE I'M MOST SKILLED AT IS SALMON RUN, RIGHT? SO TELL ME WHY THIS FAILED TOO! EVERY TIME, I GET TO WAVE 3, AND I FINALLY THINK: "this is it, this is gonna be cleared! imma get me my money!" EVERYONE DIES AND NOT EVEN MY SPECIAL CAN SAVE THEM!

AND YES, I KNOW I "CAN'T WIN THEM ALL," BUT I WANT TO WIN AT LEAST ONE!

It never fails.

I'm a couple matches fresh off of a Blaster/Brella/String/E-Liter team. Sweat Fest! I then get a match where, I, the Wellstring V Custom, finally gets paired with a legitimate frontline.

I have a Dualie and an N-Zap frontline to compliment our backline. Sounds great, right?!

Wrong!

We begin the Tower match. The Squiffer and I head to the Tower. I'm painting to create angles for our frontline to get busy.

Twenty seconds in, I notice that our frontline is behind us. I think nothing of it, but then I notice little things that give away the skill level of my teammates. The bunching up in one spot. Prioritizing specials over slaying and pushing the objective.

Did I mention that this is X-Rank?!

In conclusion, I've noticed a steep dropoff in teammate competency since Raiders dropped. I'm going to need some of the real ones to jump back into S3. I don't know how long I can deal with little Timmy and users with names like "Cupcake" and "BoyKisser". 😅

not trimmed, just for your enjoyment

Tell me how I’m supposed to carry in SoloQ when I play this?!

Edit: I know the complaint is getting stale but I really want to see this thing being good at least once in this game.

That spend an entire match camped in one position, spamming auto-bombs, torpedoes, etc. I get that it’s a way to play, but it can't be fun and coincidentally it is also the definition of being a shiesty bitch.

It's also incredibly brave.

Edit: since it was brought up, I wanted to be very clear that this post in no way, condones violence or personal harassment. I am probably older than most of you which means the idea of being attacked online isn’t something I grew up with. It would be laughable if someone attacked me online cause I would never know.

Anyways, the point of this post is shit talk and I expect to get as good as I give, but never ever attacking anyone personally

If you don’t believe me, watch this battle replay: RFU8-NYW1-AKHW-KQOU. This is perhaps the first game in Splatoon history where both teams lost. The team with two eliters lost the game, and my team had negative fun.

How was I supposed to derive any enjoyment from this? I felt nothing even after the win. Knowing that Nintendo will never nerf it just makes it worse.

But, in all honesty, eliter the way it’s designed just doesn’t work for Splatoon. I’d like to have hope for Splatoon 4, but I know Nintendo would never remove a weapon lest they piss off the eliter elitists.

Sorry for the rant.

Seriously am I just destined to never win or is this games matchmaking really that bad? How is it even possible to reach top 500 if this is the kinda stuff you have to put up with?

Someone asked me to post this replay in response to their post, please dont nuke me mods😭

u/Oreobey2

u/A_Guy_in_Orange

Im not the best, but i did get a knockout in S rank, on my first try, so its GOTTA be decent.