Where are you, or where would you go?

[u/DHN_95]

Let's try something slightly different.

- Are you in the city, or suburbs?
- Do you have a good friend base there (I believe this strongly plays into how much you enjoy where you're living)?
- If in a city, how much are you actually walking to all the places you claim to want to visit?
- Where's your ideal location (I'd like to know the specific city/neighborhood, if there is one, not just what you're hoping the area would have)?

I'm just curious what has built your opinions other than 'I can't go anywhere'. I feel my experience with the suburbs have shaped how I felt about them, and often leads me to defend them, however, I did (and still do) have a good friend base that I regularly saw (and still see), which basically negated many of the inconveniences that are often complained about here.

[u/KingBradentucky]

Suburban Florida, not a lot of friends (I also live in like MAGA headquarters so any person I meet my age is probably a huge Trumper), ride my cargo ebike everywhere. I do not own a car. I would love to be in NYC, Chicago, Philly or Baltimore. I fucking hate Sarasota Florida with everything in my body.

[u/OchiMochi → u/KingBradentucky]

I'm on the opposite coast and can confirm. MAGA Headquarters.

[u/AcidReign25]

Suburb of Cincinnati. Really like it. Great friend group. 7 couples going to Napa in several weeks. Bike trails near the house. Drive pretty much everywhere which I am good with as I enjoy driving my Jeep. House works well for me as I also enjoy DIY and doing landscaping. Originally planned to retire to the Carolinas but have decided we are going to stay here since we like it so much.

[u/thesockmonkey86]

I’m In Chicago. I don’t have a car at the moment, I bus/walk everywhere, one of my clients is in the burbs, I bus/train to the town and have to walk 25-30 minutes.

Specifically, I’m in the South Shore area. My wife can get to work in 30 minutes only only express bus.

Don’t plan on leaving where I live for a while because we own our condo.

[u/bobateaman14]

living in a city

have a pretty good friend base

walk / transit / bike everywhere, do not own a car nor would want to

ideal living location is hong kong

[u/BeavertonBob]

• First ring Suburb. 
• Decent friend base. I don’t have a single best friend locally aside from my partner , but I’m not wanting for social connections.
• I walk to 70-80% of my destinations. Bike or transit to the rest. I only use my car to go camping or hiking outside the metro.
• Ideally, I’d be somewhere near Sunnyside or Buckman, Portland, Ore. I just can’t justify the commute. 

[u/oheightnineeight]

City. Not a lot of friends here because I just moved from another city where I did have a lot of friends.

I walk to many places I visit, the rest of them I mostly cycle to. Sometimes I take the bus. Every 5-6 weeks my wife and I will use the carshare car.

My ideal location is near the corner of Saint-Denis and Mt. Royal in Montreal, where I once lived. Or anywhere in Berlin.

I grew up in the suburbs, I had friends there, I learned to drive, and I despised them since I was old enough to reason. I remember reading Harriet the Spy (so I was what, 8? At most?) and being jealous of kids who could walk places.

[u/kit-kat315]

I live in a suburb to a small city (Binghamton) in upstate NY- an unincorporated hamlet between two towns. Some walkability- grocery/shopping plaza, a few restaurants, a park. Family and friends are here.

I would love to live in a Victorian era house near downtown Ithaca, NY (small city). I'd want plenty of community events, restaurants, farmers markets, boutique shops, and nearby hiking. And a decent public transit system. But not such a large city that it feels impersonal. Saratoga Springs would be another good city option.

I generally enjoy living in the suburbs, but it would be nice to be in a more lively area.

[u/Slow_Description_773]

I live in a town.

I have zero friends.

Public transportation is shit, I have to drive everywhere.

Ideal location would be Hong Kong or Singapore.

[u/DungenessKrab]

Suburbs. No. West Seattle, still kinda suburban but way more dense than unincorporated King County where i live

[u/Extension_Risk_7229]

-Suburb of Orlando
-have a pretty good friend group and social life
-ideal location would probably be Copenhagen, Utrecht, or Amsterdam.

Although I have friends here car dependency has stripped me of any civic space and there is not much to do here. If I didn’t have any friends, I think it would be VERY hard to make any.

[u/lethal_rads]

I’m not 100% sure how you’d classify where I live (and I’m not about to say) but probably an inner suburb. Geographically somewhat isolated from the city proper, but somewhat easy access by transit (with more being built). A walkable mixed use neighborhood that’s a lot of older single family homes. But the overall trend is denser and more access to transit.

No good friend base (me issue)

I predominantly walk within my neighborhood for daily needs and use transit/walk downtown. But options for the city as a whole are somewhat limited. I still drive to work and have to drive a lot of other places. It is just “I can’t go anywhere” it’s so much easier to go places now than it was before. Even with fewer friends, I feel more like a part of the community than my old city

I think my ideal location is where I’m at now, just a bit denser and with better transit. It’s moving in that direction, but it’s not quite where’d I’d like yet.

Being able to walk and take the train a lot more had been great for my mental health. It’s just way easier and more convent to go walk to a restaurant or grocery store than have to drive everywhere. And I do go to downtown way more, and stay there longer. I’m not good with people, but I do feel way less isolated than I did in my old city.

[u/MobileInevitable8937]

I live in Philadelphia, and I love it here. Solidly urban lifestyle. I live in a walk-up apartment in a beautiful, quiet neighborhood that's a 5 minute walk from the subway. I'll answer the questions in order:

- Are you in the city, or suburbs?

City

- Do you have a good friend base there (I believe this strongly plays into how much you enjoy where you're living)?

yes! I have a close friend group I meet with at least monthly, as does my girlfriend.

- If in a city, how much are you actually walking to all the places you claim to want to visit?

Constantly. I am car-free by choice. I walk, ride the train or the bus everywhere. When me and my partner go out on weekends or in the evening, we walk or take the train/bus. I walk 12k steps a day on an average day.

- Where's your ideal location (I'd like to know the specific city/neighborhood, if there is one, not just what you're hoping the area would have)?

I live in Fairmount currently, which is a truly lovely neighborhood and a good balance between what I wanted (denser city) and what my partner wanted (quieter neighborhood). We really hit the jackpot here. Sometimes I wish I lived in one of the high-rises near Rittenhouse Square though, that's my dream neighborhood.

I grew up in a suburban neighborhood in a very rural town. I was lucky enough to have been able to walk to school, my friend's houses, the YMCA where my mom worked, etc. I was able to bike places too. I didn't realize just how lucky I was until I was older and started noticing just how car-dependent everything was. I realized I shouldn't take walkability for granted, and especially not public transit. Never going back to the suburbs.

[u/SilverBolt52 → u/MobileInevitable8937]

I live in Pennsyltucky (between Lancaster and Harrisburg) and have been trying to move to Philly for the past 3 fucking years.

My gf of 8 years isn't on board. Idc I hate it here. Even seeing a damn Flyers game is a task that involves taking off work and driving through traffic hell just to get to 69th St. I'm done. Sick of living here.

I'm pretty much sold on W Philly. Coming from a lower income working class background its affordable, walkable, has trolleys, and seems to be up and coming like Fishtown in the early 2000s. Sure there's crime, be sensible and it'll be fine.

[u/madmoneymcgee]

I like my friends and will make the effort to see them and hang out whether they live in the city or the suburbs but I don't think it matters positively or negatively for what goes into my decision making for where to live (or what I think is a good idea or a bad idea for a community).

If anything the big lesson I've learned is some people just don't like to go more than a few minutes from their house no matter what. I've seen that play out for people who live in the suburbs and then move to the city and vice-versa.

Which similarly, I don't really begrudge driving 45 minutes to see my friends but having to hop in the car even for stuff that's about a mile away because there's no safe way to walk there gets really frustrating.

Which is why I like where I live because it's "suburban" in the idea that it's not that dense and there are some houses with big yards but there's also sidewalks and bus service so that I can get to the pharmacy and grocery store on my own just fine. And if I need to leave the neighborhood for all the trendy restaurants and bars that's fine because I'm only going there occaisonally anyway.

[u/iminlovewithyoucamp]

Currently in Downtown Denver/ city but i lived in SuburbanHell for 30+ years.

It's growing every month, now that i moved to Denver, CO. Moved here on 8/18/2025.

I ride my e scooter, plus use light rail, bus, train to get around. I live in a very central part of Denver.

I'm already here. I live in Denver, CO. living car-free while owning a e scooter, with my dog. I'm already free.

[u/Hoonsoot]

I live in a suburb.

No friends here (I am almost 60 - all my friends are people I met in the past and they are spread all over the country). Friends become considerably less important as you age. To be honest, as long as my wife is around and my kids visit once in a while, I have everyone I want. Where I live is ok. Not great, not horrible.

I am not telling you my ideal location. I will be moving there when I retire and don't want anybody getting any ideas and moving there. Lets just say its a small town (<3,000 people) in Oregon, with an active downtown that is within walking distance of most of the housing. Its only about 5 miles from a considerably larger city (>100,000) that has a hospital and some of the other amenities I will hopefully not need that much.

[u/ChristianLS]

I am in a pretty walkable/bikeable college town in the US with decent bus service (Boulder, Colorado).

I'm happily married with a couple of kids. I don't really do friends these days, but that's more a me being very introverted thing plus life just being extremely busy, than anything to do with where I live. I do like the casual contact with people entailed in living somewhere that's not an isolating suburb, I consider it important to my mental health.

Unfortunately we ended up a few miles from downtown after living right in the middle of everything for a few years; our tiny 650sf apartment wasn't cutting it anymore, so we bought a 3br townhome a little more toward the edge of town. It does have great access to Boulder's huge bike path network though, and I use an electric cargo bike as my primary means of transportation. Sometimes I do walk to the big shopping center a mile away.

My ideal location would be a dense urban neighborhood in a big city where I can walk for all of my daily needs and take frequent, fast trains for anything outside of walking distance. Various life circumstances led us here, plus a smaller city with great access to nature does have its advantages when raising a family. Eventually when the kids are grown up my wife and I will probably move to a city like NYC or Chicago.

[u/Musichead2468]

I live in a suburb of DC and work in a suburb of Baltimore. On weekends hangout in DC. And some weekdays after work. And some Friday nights after work hangout in Baltimore. I have friends in the suburb of Baltimore and DC. And the city of Baltimore and DC. For a while wanted to move to Baltimore cause it's cheaper. But I now prefer DC cause of how good it's public transit it. Want to move to DC someday. I don't hangout in the county I live in much outside of being home.

Also one day I wanna move to the Pacific Northwest

[u/313Tommy]

-Suburbs but planning to move to a smaller city when I get the money
-It had a rough patch but but it’s starting to get good again
-I try to visit around 4 new big cities a year and walk as much as possible (usually 30-40k steps/day)
-wicker park Chicago(if coupled) or west village nyc(if single)

[u/Kevz210]

Technically a small city, but more like the inner suburbs

Yes, decent amount of friends nearby

I can walk to the beach, public park and grocery store. Elementary and middle schools are in walking distance, high school in biking or bus distance. Downtown and the local train station is in biking distance but I drive due to problems with bike thefts.

I am mostly happy where I am, it’s a middle ground between affordable, yet having enough nearby so I don’t spend all day driving.

[u/SteelSlayerMatt]

I unfortunately am trapped in suburban hell, but if I could, I would leave in a heartbeat.