It might not even be a conscious decision. I worked at a Target for a bit and there was an older lady who would come back to get a water bottle every day for her lunch. Problem is she was tiny and her water was on the top shelf so she had to climb for it. First time I saw her do it I was just like "haha wtf are you doing," walked over and grabbed the bottle for her. She thanked me but when I told her to just ask me for help since I was always on the water wall anyway she said no she likes to do stuff herself to keep some independence. I took that on its face and just let her do her thing (while making sure she wasn't in danger obviously, and sometimes grabbing it for her to be cheeky) but as I chewed on the idea I realized I did that shit a lot. Just help someone I see who could possibly use it as I'm strolling past without asking if they wanted it. It came from a good place but I realized a lot of people probably don't want that help so straight-forwardly.
Since then I've made a point to ask "do you want help/a hand" to anyone I see struggling. Sometimes I'll still straighten someones shit out as I'm going to do something else without thinking but I've been much more cognizant of it since she brought it up to me.
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u/Turbulent_Host784 6d ago
It might not even be a conscious decision. I worked at a Target for a bit and there was an older lady who would come back to get a water bottle every day for her lunch. Problem is she was tiny and her water was on the top shelf so she had to climb for it. First time I saw her do it I was just like "haha wtf are you doing," walked over and grabbed the bottle for her. She thanked me but when I told her to just ask me for help since I was always on the water wall anyway she said no she likes to do stuff herself to keep some independence. I took that on its face and just let her do her thing (while making sure she wasn't in danger obviously, and sometimes grabbing it for her to be cheeky) but as I chewed on the idea I realized I did that shit a lot. Just help someone I see who could possibly use it as I'm strolling past without asking if they wanted it. It came from a good place but I realized a lot of people probably don't want that help so straight-forwardly.
Since then I've made a point to ask "do you want help/a hand" to anyone I see struggling. Sometimes I'll still straighten someones shit out as I'm going to do something else without thinking but I've been much more cognizant of it since she brought it up to me.