r/consulting • u/BasicAddendum6775 • 23d ago
Am I a masochist?
I get overwhelmed by work. It’s all consuming. But I genuinely feel even worse when I don’t have much going on in my projects or am not actively working towards something. No work life balance.
Any one feel this way?
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u/mazda_corolla 23d ago
Have you ever considered that you might have ADHD?
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u/Straight_Cup_8524 23d ago
nah that's just the consulting brainworms, your nervous system got rewired to need the chaos or it thinks something's wrong
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u/Purple-Praline-4864 20d ago
I’m this way and don’t have ADHD. I know everyone says that, but I think some people are just wired that way. I have had better coping skills as I have advanced in my career.
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u/quickblur 23d ago
I'm the exact same way. I'm on vacation now but am still checking emails because I'm constantly worried about slowing things down or things falling through the cracks while I'm out.
It's not healthy...
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u/BasicAddendum6775 23d ago
Definitely try to unplug. All your problems will be there when you get back
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u/shakalakabrotha 15d ago
Yes, but theres a difference between knowing what they are as they're happening vs being dealt multiple blows on day one when you're back
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u/BabySharkMadness 23d ago
I find a lot of my feelings about myself are derived from getting stuff done at work and checking checkboxes. If I’m not getting paid, I have a hard time figuring out what to do.
Hobbies help. But I already know retirement is gonna be a bitch.
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u/BasicAddendum6775 23d ago
What hobbies have helped you?
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u/BabySharkMadness 23d ago
Knitting, woodworking, video games where there’s a sub culture of building stuff in the games (the Pokémon version of animal crossing is an especially good one for this). Stuff where you’re doing things in a specific order for a specific amount of time to build to a completed thing.
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u/United-North-3123 23d ago
Understandable but in my case I just feel like I'm going to get laid off if I don't have much going on.
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u/Motivated_Sloth_749 23d ago
100 percent. I get so stressed out and burned out and feel like I can’t take it and need a break. Then whenever I get it, I don’t know exactly what to do with myself and the few things that I have to do I just procrastinate on and half ass.
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u/DumbNTough 23d ago
It might be time to have some long conversations with yourself about what you really want to achieve with your life, and whether the things you're filling up your days doing are really contributing to those goals.
There are millions more proposals, white papers, and client hours than you can ever do as one person. The question is whether you are using your one life to do the things you really wanted to do, or if you're taking multi-year detours chasing tiny dopamine hits from completing tasks that ultimately don't matter to you.
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u/BasicAddendum6775 22d ago
What did you end up deciding? Tbh I dont even know what is it I want to do in life. It’s daunting to think about
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u/zachmaudie 19d ago edited 19d ago
Definitely not alone. Some people genuinely feel better when they have a clear goal to work toward, but finding something outside work to stay engaged can help break that cycle.
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u/Individual-Sweet-734 17d ago
Yes all the time. It’s either stressed due to being on bench or stressed by working and hearing complaints from clients
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u/DistributionBest6710 10d ago
Been there. I've started a book club with friends as a hobby to force myself to be engaged in something else. + has daily/weekly "deadlines", "required preparations" for a "meeting", required "notetaking"...
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u/Hydrangeamacrophylla 23d ago
Could be ADHD. Could be chronic people pleasing. Perfectionism. Type A personality. A deep seated sense of worthlessness that you’ve channeled into doing instead of being
I recommend getting chronically ill, being fucked over by your employer and realising how insignificant all this bullshit is.