ACNE

[u/SufficientOwl5550]

stopping t has made my acne flair up tremendously oh my word. Struggling lately with top surgery regret and get this feeling of impending doom and anxiety in my heart multiple times a day. Just trying to take it day by day, catch up on college classes, and breathe.

Any advice on talking to loved ones? I have family members I want to reach out to but it feels like a burden to be like nvm I’m not trans. Idek.

I’ve already been researching breast reconstruction (don’t worry I’m not gonna jump into that lmao, I got mastectomy in March of this year). Expecting that a surgery will fix my self-concept is a lesson I’ve already learned, and I know it won’t fix the root of the issue.

I started searching for a therapist who WILL NOT encourage me to continue on hormones just because I’m distressed (at the result of the hormones and surgery).

People look at me so confused, even my boyfriend who’s trans. One of the first things he said to me when I told him I regret top surgery is that “it just sucks because people use this as a reason to say ‘see, they regret surgery so it shouldn’t be offered.’” my values and opinions on transition have changed so now I am wanting to break up with him. I love him but I also don’t see a future with him and I don’t think he understands how much pain I am in, despite me expressing my regret almost daily.
We live together which makes things ten times worse so any advice on how to break up with someone who moved in three months ago would be much appreciated, I feel horrible but I can’t keep pretending things haven’t changed.

[u/Fantastic-Tough9610]

That sounds incredibly tough. That feeling of impending doom goes away over time, I promise. I've had my mastectomy years ago but upon realizing I'm detrans earlier this year I started getting it too. It's anxiety. It passes. Your brain eventually adapts to the reality of the situation, and you keep going. Your partner's reaction sounds incredibly invalidating. It's always the "you can express your regret BUT add a thousand disclaimers that transition is still great" with the trans crowd, unfortunately. Just sit him down, explain how you feel and what doesn't sit right with you about his behavior, and just say you don't wish to continue.

[u/SufficientOwl5550 → u/Fantastic-Tough9610]

Thank you for your advice and reply, I definitely feel like I woke up from a sort of nightmare. I know that he loves me and I love him but we are incompatible now. he has been a very good boyfriend in a lot of ways, however I have different beliefs now.