r/jordan • u/Inner-Draw6024 • 16h ago
Discussion للنقاش Dating in Amman
Honestly, dating in this city sucks.
As a 30-year-old man, I don’t understand why it’s so hard to find a woman to settle down with.
Have women become too demanding? Are men not meeting their expectations? Is it the economy? Or is there something else going on?
Most of my friends around my age, both men and women, are successful and good-looking, yet many of them face the same struggle.
So, what exactly is going wrong with dating these days?
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u/jewels_1999 16h ago
Where does one begin!
Every aspect of it seems detached from reality and one of the most most challenging part is the lack of CLEAR COMMUNICATION, people not being able to express themselves and their intentions with their mouth full and with confidence is confusing!
And to speak from personal experience, men seem to lack this the most!
Also, expectations are distorted!
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u/IntelligentRaisin242 15h ago
I think that’s a problem with men in general tho not just Jordan specifically
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u/jewels_1999 15h ago
It’s getting more persistent
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u/IntelligentRaisin242 15h ago
Also now that I think about it, bad communication is an issue with women as well.
If people knew how to communicate better life would be way easier
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u/jewels_1999 15h ago
It’s a general societal issue with both genders, but when a guy approaches you, his communication should be clear and intentional. Then, it’s on the woman to communicate back and so forth…
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u/darkasassin97 14h ago
men this, women that
dont u get bored of pointing fingers
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u/jewels_1999 14h ago
It’s called social observation, you should try it too. It helps recognize patterns.
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u/darkasassin97 13h ago
biased social observation*
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u/jewels_1999 13h ago
Dismissing an observation as biased doesn’t automatically make it wrong
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u/darkasassin97 13h ago
this one in particular is wrong
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u/jewels_1999 13h ago
Then explain what makes it wrong
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u/darkasassin97 13h ago
"from personal experience men seem to lack this the most"
why do you also have personal experience with dating women to be able to confidently make this claim?
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u/jewels_1999 13h ago
I’m talking about what I’ve personally encountered, not claiming to have conducted a comparative study on both genders. Chill! There’s a difference between making an observation and claiming it as an objective universal truth.
Read the entire thread bro, sis.
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u/Maleficent-Poem-4982 7h ago
Simply, women need men, and men need women. We all need someone to love, someone to lean on, and someone to be there for us when life gets tough. It’s not about who needs who more or who can do more on their own. It’s about being there for each other, caring for each other, and making life better together. At the end of the day, no matter how independent we are, having someone by our side who understands us, supports us, and genuinely cares about us makes all the difference.
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u/Beneficial_Extent_47 12h ago
Basiclly because Women have options,if she doesn't want to get in relationship with you that means you are average replaceable dude with average look and status.
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u/jordanesiannitemare 15h ago
U probably just have the wrong vibe for who you are going for
Figure out who matches ur vibe , be confident and ask people out - magical , most ppl are like u looking. U just got to find the right moment plus it’s a numbers game - don’t take it personal
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u/Inner-Draw6024 14h ago
Could very well be the “vibe”.
I dont have a problem taking them out. The aftermaths of the dates are usually not the best though.
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u/watashiwaeomanudesu 12h ago
Jordan isn’t exactly a country where dating is the norm. People here still prefer traditional ways, even if young people do get to know each other outside those rules. That should be pretty obvious, idk how a 30yo man still hasn’t figured that out by now, no offense mate. That’s what I see based on my daily communication with friends and relatives around.
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u/Cold_Measurement5329 11h ago
Just super weird expectations. I came from America over the summer and met this girl and did everything the traditional way. I would say I’m fairly good looking and do well for myself. We got engaged and I had to go back to the states until December. She said she didn’t want to continue last week. She “couldn’t understand my mindset”. What does that even mean😂😂
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u/Inner-Draw6024 11h ago
Shit happens man. I’m sorry you have to go through this.
Chin up. It’s her loss.5
u/Prestigious_Flan_726 8h ago
Why her loss? What if he was unsuitable for her? Or he mistreated her?
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u/SnarkySaurus_ 9h ago
As a 30 woman who’s been thru the dating scene here, I think our generation grew up between two worlds, families and society still expect traditional values, while social media exposes us to more modern ways of living and relationships.
The problem is that a lot of people never really figured out what they believe in. They just pick whatever suits them. They want the freedom of modern relationships but still expect the double standards of traditional ones!
Social media made it worse because people started judging partners based on their lifestyle rather than their character. And that’s how we ended up with situationships, commitment issues, and people who say they want an independent partner but get intimidated when they actually meet one.
I think the hardest part is that when you actually know yourself, your values, and what you want, it becomes exhausting trying to find someone on the same page. You meet people who call themselves open minded until they meet someone who lives differently from them.
And honestly this goes both ways, women do it too It’s not about men vs women it’s about people not being honest with themselves about what they really believe in and what they expect from others.
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u/GrimselPass 7h ago
I think dating is common in some subcultures within the city that tend to be more flighty, “dynamic”, and a lot more heterogenous in terms of expectations/familial norms/etc. Whereas in more conservative parts of Amman that don’t date, you’ll get the more traditional trajectory of courtship to marriage, and can probably align more on expectations as they don’t tend to go too far outside the community as well.
As someone living outside of all that I find it a little daunting as well, I wouldn’t personally feel comfortable dating for religious reasons but I don’t belong to the super trad groups where the other method was straightforward lol.
Best of luck 😊
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u/IndicationFit3539 5h ago
Guys most of them are freaks, they don't know what they want, and dating here is just waIt can be incredibly disheartening when you feel like you are putting in genuine effort only to be met with inconsistency
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u/Doge_Dollars 15h ago
I thought dating didn’t exist in Jordan. It’s too conservative. You basically meet someone via family or friends and then proceed basically towards engagement and marriage. So that’s why expectations are really high. Women need to see you as marriage material from the get go. Casual dating isn’t a thing in Jordan in my opinion.
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u/OkRecommendation6961 14h ago
Lol you are up for an awakening
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u/Doge_Dollars 14h ago
Not really. I’m not interesting in dating in Jordan whatsoever. It’s just an observation I’ve made and I think it’s spot on.
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u/OkRecommendation6961 14h ago
Thats like saying i have never tried to make a meat loaf in my life ,never watched how its done but I am 100% confident that I can make it without dropping a sweat
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u/Doge_Dollars 14h ago
I have friends, family members, and acquaintances that can give me their experiences. Also my own past experience. I’m just not interested currently. I’m sure you can understand this.
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u/Used_Sleep_9973 15h ago
men are a headache
we can be independent we dont need u
u are simply an addition
can you add then sure if not bye bye
also men nowadays are princesses
they want everything brought to them soooo honestly being single is better free do what u love and non of the headache of someone telling you to what to do and what not to do
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u/Inner-Draw6024 14h ago
fair point but this is an argument for someone who isnt interested in dating at all. Original post is about people who are interested in dating but have not succeeded.
Thanks for the input tho.
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u/Choco_310 13h ago
You try finding someone outside of the city ?
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u/Inner-Draw6024 11h ago
I refuse to date expats. But might come to that eventually. You never know.
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u/Side-Secret 13h ago
Based on what i have seen so far, the economy is the biggest hurdle. But also some expectations on both sides have become rather too picky i.e for guys: tall slim blond blue eyes thick mature but 20 yo, knows how to cook, clean, conservative but also working to help with the house but also not allowed to work in contact with the opposite gender.... On the other side: he has to be tall but not too tall, muscled but not too muscled but not too lean, dark, but maybe blond, but also maybe a bit in between, not poor but not too rich (aka powerful) young but not too young, but not old, but he has to be very mature, selfmade, but from a rich family,.... contradictions on top of contradictions from both sides, and that's why most are not marrying and growing old, settling out of hurry and then nagging and maybe divorcing.