r/mildlyinfuriating • • 21d ago

I'm slightly vexed Grown man gets mad because he doesn’t know what ordering a “plain” burger means

So I work at Five Guys and for those who don’t know, when you order a burger there you get to fully customize the toppings on it (helps justify the price tag a tiny bit i guess). And you choose between a little (single) or regular (double) burger.

I had a pleasant enough exchange with a customer while ringing up his food… and when it came to his cheeseburger I asked what toppings he wanted on it. He looked at me and said, “Oh you know… just a plain, regular cheeseburger.” Ok great, a cheeseburger with nothing on it, easy enough.

Well we make the food, and a minute after he gets it he comes back up to me, visibly annoyed and holding the burger.

“You made my food wrong. There’s nothing on it.”

“Oh I’m sorry sir, I thought you’d ordered a plain cheeseburger.”

“I did. Do you not know what that means? Like a McDonald’s burger.”

Ok first of all, “McDonald’s” is not a standard for how someone orders burger toppings and second of all, this guys in his late 40s to early 50s and has never once run into this issue ordering a plain burger?

“Ok I’m sorry about that sir, we’ll remake that for you. What exactly did you want on it?”

I shit you not, with an annoyed voice he ordered:
Ketchup. Lettuce. Pickles.
So notably NOT a McDonald’s cheeseburger???

He got what he wanted in the end and I apologized because customer service but like?? I’m in awe at the sheer level of misunderstanding and audacity.

29.9k Upvotes

4.7k comments sorted by

View all comments

183

u/IWasGoatbeardFirst 21d ago edited 21d ago

What’s wild is that every time my dad ordered a plain cheeseburger, it would be a whole thing and he would have to clarify exactly what he meant by “plain.” No ketchup, mustard, lettuce, tomato, pickle, or onion. Just meat and cheese on a bun.

I never understood why he had to explain what “plain” meant to him. Now I get it.

23

u/PawnWithoutPurpose 20d ago

People mix up plain and regular. That's what's happened here and that's probably what happened to your dad before

0

u/GuKoBoat 20d ago

I think the problem comes with burgers with all kind of fancy stuff on them. Plain could mean a normal cheeseburger with salad, pickles, ketchup, mustard but without bacon, mushrooms, fancy aioli, roasted onions and gold leaves.

34

u/Teagana999 21d ago

Plain burger enjoyer here. I have to explain what plain means because experience has shown me that a surprisingly large number of people do not know what plain means. I usually say "no veggies, no sauce," it's a little faster while still being reasonably clear.

5

u/MelodicMockingjay74 20d ago

Same. It's gotten easier with self order machines, which I use because social situations are icky to me

1

u/Teagana999 20d ago

Same, I love mobile ordering.

1

u/open_thoughts 15d ago

I avoid them because isolation is icky to me

3

u/Dashiepants 20d ago

Same. If I am ordering a fast food cheeseburger, I strongly prefer it plain. And I have learned to clarify: “Plain cheeseburger please. Just meat, cheese, and bun” before I started doing that, I only had a 75% success rate.

But the funny thing is now that they have those screens. The modifier is just “plain” so we were always ordering it correctly but our extra words seem to make it sink in.

1

u/Teagana999 20d ago

That. There's one restaurant I go to sometimes, and I hear them behind the counter. I ask for my burger in my customary way, extra clear, and then I hear the person shout "plain" to the kitchen.

-1

u/Noughmad 20d ago

large number of people do not know what plain means

There is no standard definition of what "plain burger" means. Just because it means something to you, and something else to someone else, doesn't make one of you "right" or the other "wrong".

If you're a customer, just order clearly, and if you're a server, just ask for clarification.

3

u/Darrelc 20d ago

There is no standard definition of what "plain burger" means.

Plain hamburger - meat, bread

Plain cheeseburger - meat, bread, cheese

I now understand how people can fuck up an incredibly simple order.

1

u/sykoKanesh 20d ago

I worked at Burger King back in the mid 90's or so. Plain hamburger meant a burger patty on a bun. Plain cheeseburger meant a burger patty, with cheese, on a bun.

I'd be shocked if there still wasn't a "plain" button on the systems.

I have a feeling that hasn't changed, just that people working these jobs don't really give a shit anymore. Honestly? Rightfully so, in some regards, because yes corporations are shitting on us.

Buuuuut.... if you choose to do that job, and are doing that job because of your choice to do said job, then don't take it out on the customers.

But to get off my soapbox and swing back to the original point; yes, there is very much a standard definition of what "plain" means in fast food.

-2

u/yourmothersgun 21d ago

Why don’t you people just say meat and cheese only? Seems to be the most clear way to communicate that you want a cheeseburger with meat and cheese only.

13

u/Beaticalle 20d ago

"Meat and cheese only" will very frequently still get you ketchup, mayo, and/or mustard on whatever you're ordering because some people can't comprehend not wanting those things. It's very difficult to get people to think outside of whatever they personally consider to be the default.

10

u/Teagana999 21d ago

I say that too, because enough people exist who will misunderstand if you don't say the same thing three different ways.

"Plain burger, totally plain, no veggies, no sauce, just the burger, bun, and cheese."

4

u/llaeli 20d ago

Because I did that once and was brought a patty and cheese with no bun...

0

u/yourmothersgun 20d ago

Haha ok that’s just crazy, you just can’t win lol

4

u/IWasGoatbeardFirst 20d ago

“You people?”

0

u/yourmothersgun 20d ago

Meat cheese bun people. That’s the answer! You guys just need to say “meat cheese bun only” when you order. Boom solved.

5

u/IWasGoatbeardFirst 20d ago

That’s just the beginning of the conversation.

Me: I would like to order a plain cheeseburger. Just meat and cheese on a bun.”

Person behind counter: Do you want ketchup?

Me: No.

Person behind counter? Mustard?

Me: No.

Person behind the counter: Pickles? Lettuce? Onion? Tomato?

Me: No. Plain. Meat, cheese, bun.

3

u/sykoKanesh 20d ago

Some people are just dumb, lol - sad but true.

2

u/sykoKanesh 20d ago

It can work sometimes, and I generally do that, but you have to understand that the ... let's say.... "quality" ... of modern fast food workers has gone down significantly since covid.

2

u/yourmothersgun 20d ago

On that we can all agree.

8

u/ImprovementSimilar19 21d ago

Feel this. I eat most burgers plain, youd be surprised how often they slap just a burger on it, no cheese. can't really complain cause, im the one being picky. I swear to god at a mcds one time I told them I wanted a crispy chicken with only cheese, they gave me a bun with a slice of cheese it. That one did kinda piss me off, ngl. They were smirking about it when I brought it back. But hey, shenanigans make the day go faster I guess.

5

u/ermax18 20d ago

My dad also orders plain burgers and most of the time it had ketchup anyways. He started ordering the burgers “dry”. That didn’t work well either.

3

u/DullahanShotFirst 20d ago

I don't think it's a problem with the customers so much as it is some food service workers preparing food the same way out of habit or otherwise not thinking about the details of the order. Except for customers like the "plain like McDonald's but not like McDonald's" guy in the OP. That was ridiculous.

4

u/HeartOfTheMadder 21d ago

my husband has learned that when he's ordering a burger for me, the simplest way is to say "plain cheeseburger, just meat, cheese, and a bun"
because i don't like pickles, and hate mustard. i actually like cooked onions but not raw onion slices... and i don't mind ketchup. i like shredded lettuce and mayo. but..... hard to go wrong with .... proper plain.

although i swear when you order 'em plain, they add extra seasonings to the meat out of spite.

2

u/FluffySloth27 20d ago

That’s exactly what I say, too. Meat, cheese, and bun! Works for cheeseburgers, works for boyfriends, it’s great.

1

u/Life-Education-8030 20d ago

You get a boyfriend by saying meat, cheese and bun? That’s great! 😉

1

u/FluffySloth27 20d ago

Yep. The boyfriend is the meat, cheese, and bun!

1

u/sykoKanesh 20d ago

They're probably adding extra seasonings to hide the subpar meat patty.

My personal go-to when ordering a burger at a spot known for burgers/bbq/meat in general (I'm out in rural Texas, roundabouts the Bastrop area, so there are a lot of those) I find it's best to order it plain as it'll come. I just want it on the bun, no condiments (because a good burger doesn't need condiments, we've been conditioned by fast food on that one), no cheese (I'd rather get to experience that next time if it's a truly good burger) plain as it can be.

The best burger places I've been to, their burgers stand alone exactly as they come, on a plain bun (though the bun type can vary) - juicy, tasty, flavorful. Absolutely delicious.

That's, to me, is how to judge a truly good burger and how the places that have "sysco meat" or whatever stand out even more now.

2

u/Sudden-Face-4266 20d ago

I've definitely ordered a cheeseburger plain and gotten a hamburger plain instead and it's like ... I ordered a cheeseburger ... you charged me for a cheeseburger, where is the cheese?!

So, after that it's been "cheeseburger plain, with cheese" and then they always say "yeah, the cheeseburger implies that the cheese will stay [or some variation] and I've got to not rudely try and explain "well, but, every time I don't say those exact words, you all fuck it up - every time, so ... "

3

u/Happy_Macaroon2726 21d ago

I Always order my burgers/cheeseburgers plain, especially at MacDonalds. If Im somewhere else, its still plain.

-2

u/mrmcbobinsnuggles 21d ago

Yea I always thought plain means no toppings and dry means no sauces/condiments

3

u/Cidergregg 21d ago

I have to be really specific about ordering black coffee because of how many times they still dumped in sugar.  "Black, UNSWEETENED coffee please."

3

u/Life-Education-8030 20d ago

The new Chase Bank commercial makes fun of technology because the poor human says no sugar and the robot barista throws sugar in the coffee anyway!

2

u/Revolutionary-Yak-47 20d ago

Yep. The women at my Dunkin Doughnuts refuse to believe coffee can exist without a cup of sugar. order black coffee, no sugar as a habit now. 

1

u/user-the-name 20d ago

I mean, he did? "just a plain, regular cheeseburger". The word regular is in there?

1

u/Beaticalle 20d ago

Yeah, if I were taking his order at a place like Five Guys I'd probably ask, "What do you consider regular? All toppings are ordered individually here." Immediately avoids any confusion.

1

u/sdpr 20d ago

I never understood why he had to explain what “plain” meant to him. Now I get it.

Because at the end of every school year there's a fresh batch of kids working their first job in food service that don't know what plain means. It's more likely you're going to run into the issue from May/June to August.

1

u/enaK66 20d ago

Because different people have different definitions of plain. I think your dad is objectively right, but this thread shows a lot of people have confusion around that term in this context. The restaurant can't know exactly what you mean by plain so just be specific.

1

u/TheVampyresBride 20d ago

My brother goes through the same thing.

1

u/Disused_Yeti 20d ago

my mom is very picky and has to do that all the time because quite often a "plain" hamburger or chicken sandwich comes with extra stuff for no reason. she tells them every time "just the burger and the bun, nothing else" and still sometimes it gets messed up

1

u/MarekRules 20d ago

I’ve always ordered plain burgers because I hate pickles and when I was a kid I’d order a cheeseburger no pickles and still get pickles and it scarred me one too many times. So now when I go to McDonald’s or BK or whatever I just order plain out of habit.

I noticed now that when I hit plain on a McDonald’s kiosk/app it just changes it to no ketchup, no mustard, no pickles, no onions lol

1

u/ABS0LU7E 19d ago

Burger, buns, patty, cheese.