r/mildyinteresting • u/Professor10avier • 4d ago
shopping shenanigans đď¸ This person's airport bag
Just asking for a random inspection
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u/MacheteBrizz 4d ago
That's the decoy bag, the other one reads: "completely legal belongings"
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u/Justarandom55 3d ago
âI canât believe itâs not drug moneyâ
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u/Gabe-diet 3d ago
Most people are not getting this joke
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u/Visible-Literature14 3d ago
Whatâre you basing that off of?
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u/Gabe-diet 3d ago
Thereâs a British sitcom I donât know the name of but the joke goes in an airport. Do you have any dairy products to declare and she says no and they pull out a tub that says I canât believe itâs not butter⌠Some jokes are involved and then he pulls out a Ziploc bag and it says I canât believe itâs not heroin
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u/Visible-Literature14 3d ago
Thatâs not the joke, though. The joke is simply a play on I Can't Believe It's Not Butter!
The bit you mentioned is doing the same thing, thereby making I Can't Believe It's Not Butter! the root of both jokes; therefore, anyone whoâs familiar with I Can't Believe It's Not Butter! will get both jokes.
Most people will get the joke.
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u/Justarandom55 3d ago
I'm gonna be honest, I was very much referencing the airport sitcom sketch since both the post here and that sketch revolved around airport security
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u/Ornery_Ads 4d ago
I almost feel like it's asking to not be inspected... like no one would be stupid enough to actually label their drug money as drug money
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u/LionKing7810 4d ago
Thatâs exactly what a smuggler would think
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u/bigloudbang 4d ago
Airport security stuck in a logic loop over whether or not to inspect it
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u/yleechy 4d ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/RL0QcU3FBZhqb1KqxR
Richard Watterson as a security guard type scenario đđ1
u/Imesseduponmyname 3d ago
Airport security and logic do not belong in the same sentence. They are nothing alike
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u/003402inco 4d ago edited 4d ago
Thatâs funny but I wouldnât travel with that. Airport security is a humorless crowd for the most part and some might make an example out of this.
Edit. This applies globally and not just to TSA.
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u/Ressy02 4d ago
A friend of ours screamed bomb at the airport. He was a dumbass and got hauled off and flight cancelled. He missed his vacation and hotels wouldnât refund him his reservations
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u/Asron87 4d ago
Move the hotel stay to a later date, then call and cancel the next day. You canât always cancel the week of, so move it to next month.
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u/ea88_alwaysdiscin 4d ago
This is genius
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u/Asron87 4d ago edited 3d ago
Clear your history when making reservations and the price will often go down. You came back so they know you are interested, so they raise the price up.
Edit: if your AC is locked out so you canât turn it on high, look up the codes online. It was super easy for me to âunlockâ mine when I eventually ran into a locked out AC unit.
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u/No_Hetero 4d ago
TSA isn't even really looking for drugs though they'll take them if they find them. My friends flew commercially across state lines with drugs in their bags all the time. If it's a small quantity, I should say. If you got bricks they'll probably show interest lol
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u/FuzzyAd9407 4d ago
TSA made a point to make a statement of "Its not our problem unless you make it our problem" in regards to moving weed across state lines after a dude wrapped up a ounce in foil and wires a few years back.Â
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u/Omnamashivaaya 3d ago
Foil and wire⌠? I mean yea, if you leave no option except to inspect it thatâs on him
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u/FuzzyAd9407 3d ago
That was their point. Their first worry is safety and they dont give a damn what a odd lump on an x-ray is unless it looks like a weapon or say, a bomb with wires and shit.Â
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u/Omnamashivaaya 3d ago
I know, I just trying to figure out why someone would wrap weed in foil and wires to begin with unless they had a mental health disorder or were so high they probably needed to get arrested.
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u/No_Hetero 3d ago
I remember some urban myth from my high school days (2010's) that they can't see the weed on a scanner if it's in a jar of peanut butter and wrapped in foil? So probably related to that?
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u/Omnamashivaaya 3d ago edited 3d ago
What I heard was PB can conceal the smell from drug sniffing dogs, but you put it in plastic not foil, to keep the two separate. I admit doing this in my younger days when it wasnât legal anywhere. Not sure if itâs true but seemed plausible
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u/No_Hetero 3d ago
Even if it doesn't conceal it maybe the idea is they'll find the jar of PB and be like "oh the dog just loves PB" haha
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u/canadiandude321 3d ago
Who travels with a jar of peanut butter though? Iâve heard of people using shampoo for the same purpose. That makes more sense as an item youâd travel with.
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u/BrewerAndrew 4d ago
TSAâs screening procedures are focused on security and are designed to detect potential threats to aviation and passengers. Accordingly, TSA security officers do not search for illegal drugs, but if any illegal substance or evidence of criminal activity is discovered during security screening, TSA will refer the matter to a law enforcement officer. - The TSA website
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u/CNA107 3d ago
Airport security mainly cares about anything that could be used as a bomb or whatever, but also strangely enough fruit and other food products (at least at Heathrow, from documentaries I have seen). They really, really care about stopping invasive species of bugs and plant life from finding its way into places where it shouldn't be.
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u/ButtholeConnoisseur7 3d ago
That's a great thing. If TSA has done anything useful, it will have been that
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u/Big-Horse3925 4d ago
they'll take them if they find them.
Not usually true. The vast majority of stories I've heard where bags were searched while drugs were in them, unless it's an insane amount that's obviously serious trafficking, they'll pick it up, put it to the side, take your water bottle you forgot to remove, and put the drugs back lol
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u/BigResponsibleOil 3d ago
Which airports were people flying out of when that happened? Were they in legal states? My friend flying out of Texas said his weed got taken. I know TSA is federal but I wonder if what they do changes based on the state they're in, or if its up to the agent or what.
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u/Far_Estate_1626 4d ago
You travel with that when your partner with the actual drug money goes through security just ahead of you.
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u/W33DG0D42069 4d ago
Weirdly enough not every airport in the world is in America
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u/CarbonReflections 4d ago
Having over 940 million airline passengers annually, ranks the United States as #1 globally in airline travel.
Also, the US accounts for 48% of all Reddit user traffic so between these two facts plus that the bag is in English itâs a safe bet that it took place in the US.
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u/AccidentOk5240 4d ago
And the signage is in English and that looks like every US airport shuttle Iâve ever seen. Thereâs a van that Iâm 99% sure is either a Ford or a Chevy outside it.Â
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u/Repulsive_Barnacle92 4d ago
the US is the only country (aside from Ethiopia for some reason) where I have had to remove my shoes at security, this is annoying as fuck
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u/KickBallFever 4d ago
The US doesnât make you remove your shoes anymore unless you set off the scanner.
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u/financegardener 4d ago
Not sure the downvotes, at least you brought data
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u/CarbonReflections 4d ago
People donât likes facts and logic when it doesnât work to their agenda. The reality is Reddit is an American company so yes the user base will assume that a post is talking about America unless stated otherwise.
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u/angrysunbird 3d ago
There are far worse countries to do it in than the states. Read what happens to you in Singapore or Malaysia
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u/carlos_marcello 3d ago
Like th cop that book a guy for having knock off ysl opium fragrance in a hand labeled bottle that said ysl opium W đ¤Śââď¸
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u/aspaschungus 3d ago
airport security is pretty much any airport donât give 2 shits if ur carrying a super small drug quantity, specially national flights, really. flying with a couple of joints or 1-2gs of molly are no issue. they ask you to throw it away and thatâs. only in asia/ME i wouldnât do it.
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u/Real-Zucchini7432 2d ago
Indeed, arriving at Amsterdam airport once, I declared there was only âdirty laundryâ in my travel bags. I had to open my bag to proof it. Not sure if they should have seen any difference in my used hiking wear even if it should have been cleaned.
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u/fhjjjjjkkkkkkkl 3d ago
You may have excellent skills and humour. However donât do nothing at airport/aircraft. This bag is stupid
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u/Sausage_bowler 3d ago
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u/Dwayne_Hicks_LV-426 3d ago
How tf did all that fit in the tiny bag
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u/Sausage_bowler 3d ago
The gun probably wasn't in there, and maybe not the money either? Looks big enough for the other bits. This looks like a photo of "all the stuff found on the person", or maybe all the stuff in their car.
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u/mustardlydoom 3d ago
I used to work for a courier company who would often drop off packages at LAX. Got overly confident with the staff and their questioning. One question being, âwhat are you shipping out today?â, one day my very stupid self said âa bombâ, when nobody else but me was laughing, I started apologizing frantically. Luckily, the staff had known me for years but her response was âYou did not just say that, do you know where you are?â. Very lucky nothing happened and they just kept me around until the package was cleared.
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u/mwest97 3d ago
It's from Assholes Live Forever! Was a cool brand until they sold out to Spencer's. I had a fanny pack that said drug money from them in my college days
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u/fancy123876 3d ago
i have a duffle from them that says âemotional baggageâ and tsa always gets a kick out of it lol
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u/angrysunbird 3d ago
I remember hearing a story about a guy with a weed t-shirt getting pulled over in Singapore and sure enough he had weed on him. (Singapore is not a country you want to do this in).
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u/dividezero 3d ago
100% some dumbass (probably tsa) will tell them they shouldn't use that bag because it'll get them targeted for security. because anyone actually transporting illegal stuff wants a clear label on the bag. people have no whimsy
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u/Successful-Active-21 3d ago
oh my dear summer child. if it was that easy to not get flagged, it would be exploited.
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u/dividezero 3d ago
i didn't say you wouldn't get flagged. it's still stupid to tell that to someone with this bag and it's equally as stupid to flag said person for only this reason.
I'm dumb enough to do it. I'll report back the next time i fly. don't hold your breath. i don't travel much anymore
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u/octoreadit 3d ago
The joke is on you, they actually are. Want to hide something, put it in plain sight. đ
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u/HaveYouSeenMyIpad 3d ago
Itâs funny but one day theyâre going to regret it when they waste a bunch of time with some tsa prick lol
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u/Rabbid7273 3d ago
Earlier this year i went to the airport with shorts that had about 8 metal zips on it. The security and I had a good laugh about how poor of a choice that was
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u/awigglycat 4d ago
Okay, that's funny.
However, I recently went through Budapest airport. That would not end well.
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u/Fit_Adagio_7668 4d ago
Oh hey you found my bag, don't open it, i don't want my "d rug" money to be taken from me.
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u/OkMidnight8144 4d ago
And wonders why the get a cavity search before every takeoff and arrival.... Hmmm.... Maybe they wanted the searches.
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u/FayeQueen 3d ago
On a cruise we bought a comedians merch bag and in big white letters said 'DEFINITELY NOT DRUGS IN HERE". We came home and every customs/TSA stop loved it. One guy at port customs took a photo to show his dad.
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u/CLPDX1 3d ago
My (grown) sons always complain about getting ârandomly selectedâ for additional security checks. I always tell them itâs because they dress like hoodlums.
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u/whoorderedsquirrel 3d ago
My mum said I've never been pickpocketed cos I dress like one đ thanks .... I think hahaha
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u/jdog7249 3d ago
My mom was asking questions like "what's he sniffing for" and "how does he alert" when they had everyone in line walking past a sniffer dog. Yeah all 4 of us got randomed.
Only 1 other time have I gotten a random search. They were having an issue with the normal scanner and so sent some people through the regular metal detector. Every single one of us got a random search.
Starting think the randomness isn't so random.
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u/AccidentOk5240 4d ago
Ferfuckssake. And here I was ginger about wearing a very mildly political shirt on a plane recently lest I attract TSA attention.Â
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u/ObiWanBonobo 3d ago
This person either loves getting frisked, or loves getting their stuff stolen.
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u/ecneis31 3d ago
I own a bag from a bookstore that states something like "This bad contains a gun, a bomb and knowledge, be advised" I always make sure to not take it to the aiport :D
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u/listenupfellas 3d ago
Brand is Linda Finegold. I have one that says Emotional Baggae. The website is offensive, so I won't link it.
Edit:spelling
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u/Twilight_G1 22h ago
i have this exact duffel bag ! itâs from assholes live forever made by this guy kirill was here. kind of shit quality but itâs funny as hell to see it here.
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u/Iggy_Snows 3d ago
Honestly might be kind of smart fo getting through airport lines faster.
Iv been randomly chosen to be searched/have my bags swabbed 3 times in my life, and every single time I was pulled from the very back of the security line when I qued, had my bags checked, then put into the very front of security. Skipped a 2 hour line one time for a 3 min search.
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u/MultipleOrgasmDonor 4d ago
I had a fanny pack from that company with the same humorous text on it. Damn thing fell apart in 3-4hr at a concert, this person likely has issues in their near future beyond the obvious haha
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u/FunkmanMarty 3d ago
Assholes Live Forever makes this bag as well as a lot of clothing! I have one of these too but I donât use it when traveling on a plane
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u/TrippyMusician 3d ago edited 3d ago
Assholes Life Forever spotted
i had an olive green duffle that read EMOTIONAL BAGGAGE
Edit: ALF is a brand. yeesh. literally google it. they have a bunch of merch too.
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u/cardcollector_2 3d ago
Itâs all sweatshop garbage owned by some dude who is a POS, so itâs not that cool.
Itâs edgy teenager bullshit thatâs made in a super unsustainable and immoral way at best.
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3d ago
[removed] â view removed comment
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u/Charming5665 3d ago
I love when I spot it out in the wild, because I know peopleâs reactions are exactly this. I have some funny sweaters, duffles and magnets on my fridge.
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