r/popculturechat • u/Playful_Wonder_5205 • Oct 15 '25

Selena Gomez 💖 Selena Gomez Says She Has Difficulty 'Enjoying Things' for Fear Joy Will 'Go Away': 'I Got Married and Then I Was Sobbing'

https://people.com/selena-gomez-hard-enjoying-things-i-got-married-then-i-was-sobbing-11830434
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u/technicolortiddies Oct 15 '25

Yeah I totally relate to this. In fact it’s why my partner & I aren’t doing well right now. Every time something- anything happens I have to analyze the whole situation & see if anything has changed. It’s been great for work but horrid for any kind of relationship.

Edit- how does everyone deal with this? I was tested for OCD but the Drs. didn’t think I had it. I’m already in therapy weekly.

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u/twoweeeeks unhinged & unhealed Oct 15 '25

Antidepressants.

But also, something my therapist has taught me, if I catch myself in an obsessive behavior or thought, I ask, “Is this how I want to spend my time? Is there something else I’d rather be doing?” Not a total obsession killer, but it seems to become more effective the more I do it.

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u/Rogue_2187 ✨May the Force be with you!✨ Oct 16 '25

Zoloft has been a game changer for me. I knew I had anxiety, but a psychiatrist finally diagnosed me with OCD. It made so much sense. I thought OCD was like being neat and orderly but I have the same intrusive thoughts Selena does. Amongst other things. But I’m on the lowest therapeutic dose of Zoloft and it’s helped so much. Now it doesn’t take 30 minutes to leave my house because I need to check all the doors and windows and stove and oven and garage door.

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u/McFoley69 Oct 16 '25

Something that’s helped me is giving the OCD voice a dumb name, like when I start to get intrusive thought loops about a loved one getting violently maimed, I say “stfu DOOBERT”. It helps detach from these compulsive thoughts and reinforce the fact that it’s just another unnecessary protective mechanism that my brain likes to deploy.

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u/Potatoskins937492 Oct 15 '25

It's not necessarily OCD. Just because people with OCD can have this feeling doesn't mean it's purely an OCD thing. I don't have this and I do have OCD. My depression can do similar things to me sometimes (like "I don't want to go out because no one there will like me anyway"), but it's about fighting against the liar that is my brain. If your therapist isn't practicing CBT and potentially DBT with you, ask them about it. Skills on top of skills + reframing your thoughts is an important piece of therapy if you struggle with internal conflict or clinical diagnoses.

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u/languid_Disaster Oct 16 '25

Yup! Other mental illnesses and issues have this as a feature unfortunately including people who has suffered trauma

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u/[deleted] Oct 15 '25

I’m currently undergoing the intake process for proper psychiatric help but while on the waiting list I have read a book that really helped me “Overcoming Obsessive Compulsive Disorder” by David Veale and Rob Wilson. I got used copy from Amazon.

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u/PuzzledPaint8915 Oct 17 '25

Not to be like everyone has ADHD but I have OCD/ADHD (maybe autism who knows?) I was very much this way and it wasn’t until my adhd diagnosis and being medicated could I separate this stuff out from each other. I still do all of this but my husband is much more patient and gets what my brain is trying to do (keep me safe).

So if the diagnosis doesn’t fit maybe keep looking? Anti depressants never helped me unless it was an SNRI. However I didn’t even comprehend ADHD until after I gave birth and my husband was like maybe this is you?

I also have complex trauma so it all kinda jumbles together but it’s MUCH easier to know how to tackle it as a couple when you understand how your brain works.

I wish you luck and I also found a great therapist who is neuro affirming and helps me with chronic illness stuff.

It takes time but we get there….kinda?