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u/SamHandwich0 8h ago
Go to the court date, demand a trial by jury, and represent yourself
During jury selection load the panel with with women.
When you go to trial tell a hearfelt story about growing up and wishing you could use the metric system. Then tell them that metricly you were not sppeding if you replace mph with kmph.
When they find you guilty begin crying and loudly shit your pants.
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u/Positive-Ad-3554 9h ago
eat the ticket. it never happened
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u/slump_lord 8h ago
But what if the officer who wrote the ticket had a big sloppy mudpie and used too small a slice?
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u/perpendicularpelican 8h ago
Pay it by check, but overpay by like a dollar twenty five so they have to reimburse the difference. Don't cash their refund and they can't settle the infraction and it doesn't hit your insurance.
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u/FlakyUnderstanding99 8h ago
In Connecticut I'd always plead not guilty & mail the ticket in cuz they'll almost always bargain with u...if its not much n u can afford it just pay it but im not sure how things work wherever u r? Dont get another one
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u/Organic_Syrup7642 8h ago
I would highly recommend that you flee to Mexico, you are never going to get out of this situation unless you run NOW.
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u/Informal-Quantity415 8h ago
Next time put your license n registration out the window and floor it; they love that shit lol
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u/mvortex2 8h ago
Make 500 copies of the ticket. Mail those copies to 500 random people along with an official looking letter demanding payment and provide your home address. Take all of the proceeds and buy a catapult that launches bags of dog crap. Show up to your inevitable court date and fire away. Maybe call the local news station first.
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u/Dont_Care_Meh Only the best advice! 3h ago
Find out where you will appear; it should be on your ticket. The night before, break into the courthouse and exchange the flag for one with gold fringe. Then the following day, go to court, and loudly tell the judge you refuse you recognize his authority because it's an admiralty court, and has no authority over you. They have go let you go.
Oh, and bring pocket sand in case the bailiff doesn't agree with your legal standing.
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u/Waxing_Poetix 8h ago
I got one once and while I was in court I told the judge that the cops radar gun must have been defective and when was the last time the radar gun was officially checked for defects? The judge said that was my right and adjourned my case a week. When I went back to court they didn't have the paperwork so my ticket of going 88 in a 55 was dropped!
How Calibration Can Be Challenged in Court
• Missing Logs: Prosecutors must prove the device functioned properly; failure to provide shift logs or calibration certificates can weaken a ticket's validity. • Operator Error: Officers must be trained on the specific model and proper operating procedures (such as avoiding radar use near sharp curves, dense multi-lane traffic, or electrical interference). • Visual Backup: Many jurisdictions allow officers to rely on a independent visual speed estimate alongside the radar reading.
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u/Stormcrowdick1066 7h ago
Find out where the cop lives that gave it to you. Go knock on his door and demand he pays you for it. You show him who’s boss. Make sure you take a threatening object and wave it around liberally.
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u/Ok_Yak_4371 6h ago
Request a court date. A few days before, plant drugs and paraphernalia in the cop's car and house. Call it in. Your ticket will be dropped when he no-shows.
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u/Famous-Channel3027 6h ago
Here’s an idea! Follow the instructions on the ticket. Wild, I know, but I promise it works!
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u/BobcatSpiritual7699 4h ago
Speeding ticket lawyers are invaluable. I had a 100% success rate with them.
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u/No-Boysenberry-3420 2h ago
If I learned anything from my congressman you deny deny deny. And if that doesn't work you let someone else pay off your ticket. Last resort option? Sleep with an intern.
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u/Kooky-Anxiety2759 1h ago
If you’re guilty either pay the ticket or take the class and have it discharged.
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u/hauntedsemen1 9h ago
Slow down
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u/WarmLet5185 9h ago
I can’t
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u/Boopsnootboogy 8h ago
Its the pedal on the left.
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u/JakTheGripper 8h ago
Race to the courthouse to pay it. 100 MPH, minimum. Park on the court steps. so you can be first in line.