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u/Capybara327 1d ago
A lot of those skeletons are children considering how high the child mortality rate was for most of human history.
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u/Born_Procedure_529 1d ago
Yeah people really take for granted how drastically infant mortality has declined in the last 150 years or so
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u/zombie_spiderman 1d ago
Now I'm sad
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u/Capybara327 1d ago
Yeah, reality is often sad.
But at least medicine and healthcare as a whole is continuing to improve. I'd say that's a good enough reason to be happy.
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u/_killer1869_ 16h ago
Then one remembers the antivaxx crowd and all others rejecting modern medicine, making one sad again.
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u/Legitimate_Young978 1d ago
It's ok. Most necromancy can't reassemble bone chips or other majorly eroded skeletons. 4, maybe 5 skeletons each.
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u/Stretch5678 1d ago
What about those who were cremated? A skeleton may be iffy, but I’m pretty sure I can take ash.
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u/not_just_an_AI 1d ago
Also skeletons are biodegradable so the vast majority of buried skeletons won't last much longer than 100 or so years.
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u/Karnewarrior 21h ago
Skeletons aren't that hard to destroy, the magic holding the bones together is pretty brittle.
Zombies are beefy, but they're slow as fuck. Just walk away, 5head.
It's Ghouls and Revenants you have to watch out for. Them and those undead what's above them, like liches and vampires, they can fuck your shit up.
Especially liches, don't underestimate liches. They may look like a skeleton but they've had a hundred years to strengthen themselves magically and learn how to fence. Seen too many Paladins try to rush the Lich thinking he's squishy just to get MMA judo-thrown out the tower window and removed from the fight.
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u/NotSovietSpy 12h ago
We should start digging up corpses of ancient magicians, shaman, and strange religious leaders, then send them to space
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u/ConsciousStretch1028 University silent as porn star's 'bang bus' approaches Oxford 1d ago
What's the opposite of calcium? Just make bullets out of that and you're good
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u/Capybara327 1d ago
Use Hydrogen-Cloride. It dissolves bones rather quickly. If you aim at the spine and the legs, the skelly will stand no chance at all.
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u/Groundbreaking-Fig38 1d ago
....you mean.....won't stand...
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u/Capybara327 1d ago
"Will stand no chance" and "won't stand a chance" mean the exact same thing, while "won't stand no chance" is a double negative, which in the English language acts as a positive, with roughly the same meaning as "will stand a chance".
There are certain demographics that don't adhere to this rule, which is fine by me, but I prefer to use correct grammar if possible.
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u/OwnTurn1146 cool kid 1d ago
I both love how correct you are, and laughed at how that joke went completely over your head.
Forgive me.
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u/Capybara327 1d ago
Oh, I'm such an idiot. Yeah, it totally did and I feel kinda stupid.
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u/OwnTurn1146 cool kid 1d ago
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u/Capybara327 1d ago
I loved that series, and especially Ella.
But yeah, I guess it happens to everybody.
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u/somerandom995 19h ago
Acting like there's that many skeletons intact and whole is skewing numbers. Anyone cremated isn't participating, neither are 99% of people from more than a 1000 years back.
And don't forget, people who died on old age have notoriously weak hip bones anyway.
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u/ItsaCommonThingNow 1d ago
isn't the average (dry) adult skeleton something like 20lbs? just start pulling femurs out amd start swinging
or run straight through them? like a bowling ball through a window
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u/ScoredCretaceous 1d ago
We are all wildly underestimating the number of baby skeletons
A significant number of our enemies will have grabbable fontanelles
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u/VatanKomurcu 19h ago
i didnt realize the skeleton war was gonna be fought between the living and the dead. i thought it would be fought after everyone dies between factions of the dead.
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u/CheapTactics 1d ago
A lot of those skeletons are dust by now. Also, just like... Grab a big stick or a hammer and go to town. Most of them are terribly old and fragile skeletons.
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u/mdhunter99 1d ago
Aren’t skeletons like super easy to deal with? Let’s assume it’s just bone and cartilage, all it takes is one good swing of a hammer and it’s dead, or even running into them with plate armour, they’ll fall apart with ease. Have you ever held a skeleton before? They aren’t heavy, you could just toss one and it might break.
Skeletons aren’t the issue, it’s the necromancers who summoned them. They are the real threat.
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u/Wild-Lychee-3312 1d ago
Look, pal, I didn't spend 6 years in Necromancy College to be disrespected like that.
Now apologize, or I'll have your great-great-great grandmother slap you.
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u/hayimjustahuman 1d ago
And no body is even talking and the ghosts! We have like 5 ghost busters we’re so fucked!
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u/Personal-Role-8071 Screenshot Saver📱 1d ago
gun
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u/StarChaser_Tyger 1d ago
Gun no good Skeleton mostly empty space.
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u/AMostBoringMan 1d ago
Gun do piercing damage. Skeleton resist piercing because have nothing to pierce.
Use car instead. Car do bludgeoning damage. Skeleton crunchy. Skeleton weak to blunt force trauma.
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u/StarChaser_Tyger 1d ago
Unga? Bunga!
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u/Personal-Role-8071 Screenshot Saver📱 1d ago
What about grenade
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u/StarChaser_Tyger 1d ago
Someone set them up the bomb? Should work, that's smash damage, not piercing.
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u/ChemDinoSpace_47 1d ago
No but one guy with a tank or a gun could probably take on 1000 skeletons. Suppose the skeletons are eventually gathered into some place, and nuked, well we know how that goes. But in all seriousness, if the skeletons are true undead, they might just reassemble unless properly incinerated or smth, so it might take a bit more effort unless you're using explosives
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u/GoldenGoose120 1d ago
wouldn’t the guy be fighting 29 skeletons, since he’d be fighting both of their assigned skeleton groups plus the other guy’s skeleton
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u/Ill_Pain4423 1d ago
Skeletons are really weak and most of them will be very fragile from the ages, most healthy people are surviving this
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u/ToyTech316 1d ago
No muscle or tendons, how do they move? I don't think we have much to worry about.
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u/Delphox26 1d ago
A high concentration of those skeletons are in the Paris cattacombs. Just bomb that one specific area of the one specific city and that takes care of most of Europe's problem.
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u/masterfulnoname 1d ago
How many of those skeletons are babies? How many were destroyed by cremation or other burial practices? How many have been destroyed simply by time? I think things aren't as one sided as this Benadict Arm-bone thinks.
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u/k4b0odls 1d ago
Imagine fighting a necromancer and he brings your skeleton to life while it's still in your body. And now it wants to get out.
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u/Wild-Lychee-3312 1d ago
That's a great idea! I'm putting it into my next Dungeons and Dragons game.
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u/InternetUserAgain 1d ago
I could easily take five skeletons, and I am very weak. Just knock em over or hit em with a blunt object
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u/stacy_owl 1d ago
Not a lot of skeletons are gonna be whole. Consider the ones who got beheaded/drawn-and-quartered/burnt, child mortality rates for most of human history, cultures that perform sky burials (which involve manually shattering limbs and bones), cremation, and the oldest human remains which many would have decayed over time or just destroyed...etc. I think our odds are fine.
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u/Thetruestfan 1d ago
Put flesh onesies one the rest of the skeletons to make them humans until we outnumber them.
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u/Adept_Fool 1d ago
Don't forget, humans who are alive today are made from materials from those who died long ago, including the dinosaurs
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u/Spectator9857 1d ago
Bro, they don’t have ligaments or muscle. They’re weak as fuck and the ancient magic is barely holding them together. The average adult can easily kill like 50 of em before getting tired. Just take shifts smh.
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u/Wild-Lychee-3312 1d ago
I've got the solution. All we gotta do is get to the Fields Museum in Chicago). I'll animate Sue the T-Rex to fight on our side.
Hey, it's technically not necromancy when it's a dinosaur!
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u/Prematurid 12h ago
I would be bashing baby skellies with a passion. No worries, I can do yours too.
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u/armahillo 2h ago
Skeletons are dead and cant move or think, so I’m pretty sure we would win, but I dont know why we’d declare war on them in the first place
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u/ThisManisaGoodBoi 2h ago
The “winning side” when they’re introduced to 600 rounds of 5.56
https://giphy.com/gifs/t3JlPckGp0soavXZVM
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u/haleme 1d ago
Tbf a significant proportion of the skeletons are probably baby skeletons