r/CasualConversation • u/Scary_Meaning_4466 • 8h ago
Music My friend always orders coffee drinks and barely drinks them
This is silly and really doesn't matter lol but it's so puzzling to me.
Everytime we go to lunch she orders an iced coffee drink (that has milk) or a smoothie. And almost always drinks it soooo slow. I'm surprised if she makes it halfway through the drink. These drinks are like $8 too, I guess I'm cheap. Then she also proceeds to keep it for like 2-3 hrs sometimes and even take it home and these drinks always have dairy in them.
One time I brought her a thai iced tea to a fair she was selling her baked goods at. I don't know if she even touched it, I even was like isn't that going to get warm? and she just shrugged. Three hours later when she was packing up she packs up the food I brought her and the Thai iced tea. I dunno I'm gonna assume she's just throwing this stuff away at home to be polite. I would not be drinkin that after 3 hrs. I've even seen her take home what has to be a melted smoothie.
It's not really a big deal lol it just makes me scratch my head like why is she always ordering this stuff and carrying these melted drinks around? I find it weird. She's a great friend and it really doesnt effect our friendship or anything but reddits the place to anonymously scratch my head about it.
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u/WritPositWrit 7h ago
Dairy does not instantly curdle the moment it reaches ambient temperature. The drinks are fine. I guess she likes taking little sweet sips throughout her day. Perhaps tiny sips are like a diet method for her so she doesn’t consume too many calories
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u/britneys_bigtoe 8h ago
i sometimes take 5-6 hours to finish a hot coffee drink with milk in it and i've never gotten ill even if i don't keep it on a warmer
the ice melting into the drink gives you more drink. it's why i get extra ice in my iced tea at sonic for a long drive
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u/Keziah627 7h ago
I have never taken 5 or 6 hours to finish a hot coffee drink. But I have taken 3-4 hours. I do the same with my drinks at sonic. I love their ice, too
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u/britneys_bigtoe 7h ago
that's cool. i get distracted and forget i have a drink so this is pretty normal. adhd
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u/BlueBoxLady 7h ago
I don’t have adhd (officially) but I also take 3-5 hours to drink my coffee cuz I forget about it 😂
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u/Keziah627 6h ago
Yep, I start doing something and all of a sudden hours have flown by.
I have also done the opposite. I will finish my coffee then think, "I sure would like another. I will just finish this. It will only take a moment." The next thing I know several hours have passed.
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u/Keziah627 6h ago
I was just diagnosed in August with ADHD
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u/britneys_bigtoe 5h ago
welcome to the club <3
i'd offer you a jacket but we keep forgetting to order more
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u/Keziah627 5h ago
That's quite alright. I forget to wear them until I go outside. Then have to go back to grab one. By the time I get inside, I have forgotten why I went inside.
That's not necessarily the ADHD. I just tend to do that and have for a very long time.
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u/ComfortableCall3912 6h ago
More cold drink, but not more drink.
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u/britneys_bigtoe 5h ago
ice melts into liquid. drink is liquid. adding more liquid to drink means more drink
it's math
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u/ComfortableCall3912 5h ago
Yeah. So, if there was no ice, what fills the equivalent volume in the glass?
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u/britneys_bigtoe 4h ago
i'm assuming the whipped cream or steamed milk but they also use different cups for cold drinks and hot drinks
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u/SkepticMech 2h ago
Ice floats, because it is less dense than water. When it melts, it has a smaller volume than it took up as ice. By increasing the amount of ice, you are displacing more initial liquid than you will receive in melted ice.
Mathematically, the more ice you add, the less drink you get.
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u/VentWoe 4h ago
I don't get that ice logic. Isn't that just watered down and will taste watered down? I'd rather prefer less ice, so I actually get more actual drink and not just water but maybe that's just me.
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u/britneys_bigtoe 4h ago
a watered down drink is still a drink. it's not like when you drink it you don't get the watered down part. it may be bad drink (to you) but it still drink
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u/VentWoe 3h ago
Well... I am talking about the diluted taste, but you do you.
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u/britneys_bigtoe 3h ago
you said you didn't get the logic of how it's more drink. i explained it. taste did not enter the conversation until just now. good day
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u/thedespotcat 31m ago
I always appreciate that Starbucks is pretty heavy on the ice because I love to take a couple hours with my drinks 😂 then again that's usually because I'm crafting or something at the same time. If I'm out and about, I usually drink it faster (still usually the ice melts faster than I drink)
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u/woman_noises 8h ago
Why do you keep stressing that they have milk. Are you anti milk. Like the other comment said, you can leave milk sitting out for a few hours, it doesn't matter. If it's a whole day then maybe it matters.
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u/Basmati_Crunch2363 7h ago
Some people limit their food and drink intake when they are away from home because they don’t want to have to use random/public restrooms. The fact she is taking these things home shows she is still interested in them, but just wants to be home when she has them. There are conditions like colitis and inflammatory bowel disease that can cause unpleasant and sometimes debilitating digestive symptoms, some people are housebound from IBD due to these symptoms. Perhaps she has a condition like this and manages it by avoiding food and drink whilst away from home.
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u/ifonlywoo 6h ago
this is hilarious i was just thinking to myself 1 minute ago abt how two of my work besties always comment abt how i take forEVER to finish my drinks/coffees/milk teas and its just funny to me bc like it doesnt affect them at all my drinking speed and yet one of them gets so (jokingly) angry at me and the other always points out "youre still not done with your coffee???"
and idk i do finish my drink eventually, its just that it takes me a while. for instance this current iced coffee (with milk if that triggers you) i made and started drinking at 5:30 and im still not quite done and its 8:00, ill probably finish by 8:30, so almost 3 hours? which i dont think is even that long. sure the ice melts and dilutes it but its not really a big deal to me.
im cheap too so when i go out and buy an expensive coffee im absolutely bringing it home and finishing it later lol
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u/yikesbmth 5h ago
if i buy an iced coffee at like 6pm, i'll drink a bit otw home and then put it in my fridge for the next day bc i dont like drinking caffeine late (horrible insomnia and that def doesnt help lol), idk sometimes its nice to have a treat for later lol
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u/point5_2B 55m ago
Slow drinkers unite! I wonder if fast drinkers feel somehow guilted when they see slow drinkers or something, because I've also gotten borderline hostile comments about this from people who are otherwise good friends.
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u/Starfire2313 8h ago
My coffee drinks last all day too sometimes I haven’t gotten sick from the dairy yet, but it’s typical for a coffee to last me about 4 hours.
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u/Riinmi 8h ago
So.. why does it matter? You think milk turns into poison after some hours? It seems like she’s just slower with drinking? Or does she often throw it away?
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u/Spirited-Claim-9868 6h ago
I kept waiting a part where OP states that she tosses them after taking a few sips because that's the only way this makes sense and... nothing.
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u/editthxforthegold 3h ago
I feel like it's part of hypochondriac culture of the US. One if the biggest culture shocks was seeing people throwing away food because it's "unsafe" after sitting on a counter for an hour or two.
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u/yourmomlurks 6h ago
probably because OP has something in their history that makes doing whatever you want with your own drink Not Okay.
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u/Lucky-Past8459 7h ago
I put milk in my coffee and then take it to work and drink it over 8hrs and it's fine. She probably does continue to drink them at home
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u/figs_and_flour 7h ago
I do that with ALL of my drinks except water… I just like to sip. I don’t need all of it and I just want to taste it.
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u/BHunter1140 7h ago
I use to buy a latte in the morning before school at 7am and be drinking it still during lunch at noon. You won’t get sick from some milk that was made into a hot or cold drink that quickly, it’s very different to drink something that’s been left out 12+ hours vs 4hrs
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u/slightlyeven 8h ago
This is me. I have inattentive adhd. My mindset is basically: want drink it but wait I want to finish this task. Okay I’ll have some, now forget it exists until I see it again in my direct line of sight. drink a little more, rinse and repeat. I’m also less rigid about food safety stuff and actually do drink it later
Edit: ‘task’ includes a conversation or interacting with someone
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u/human-kibble 7h ago
When people get overly nosy about what I consume or how fast I consume it, it gives me massive food anxiety.
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u/feelinginvi__ible 6h ago
It gives me a reason to be even more obnoxious with how I consume my own food and drink. Perhaps I’m petty.
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u/human-kibble 3h ago
Yea I just stop consuming much around that person/people.
Sometimes I don’t notice until I’m doing it for a little while and then I’m like “oh wow- I really can’t eat/drink around this person”. That includes filling drinks like ones that have milk.
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u/QueenSlime_6665 7h ago
Yeahhh I'm a sipper, I've never had a problem with it going bad. It'd take more than 3 hours for me to throw it away. Shrug
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u/Top_Sky_4731 7h ago
I get a large iced coffee with milk in it and drink it all day at work. It’s always fine.
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u/mjh8212 8h ago
I drink my coffee fast within two hours in the morning I’ve had two or three cups. When I get an iced coffee start drinking and it’s gone. My youngest gets a drink and sips on it for an hour or more. She says she’s just trying to enjoy it not gulp. I guess I just like coffee.
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u/HotSpacewasajerk 7h ago
I'm like you, iced coffee is a waste of money because its gone in a couple of mouthfuls. Of gf is the slowest drinker and will reheat a tea like 3 times before she gets through it and thats just a regular ass mug at home, not a 12oz cup from a store
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u/Sweet_Sho 8h ago
Ahha, I can relate honestly. I like to really take my time with my drinks. Sometimes I even take a big cup of coffee home and put it in the fridge, and I'll be drinking it for a second or even a third day. I've also taken smoothies home and shoved them in the freezer to take chunks off of later. She may be a little weirdo like me
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u/GirlisNo1 7h ago
I’m a slow drinker as well. I take big bites of food and the smallest sips you can imagine lol. So I get your friend.
However, bc I know this about myself I rarely get drinks to begin with and if I do, I get the smallest size. I’ll occasionally also let stuff go if I can’t finish it. After a certain amount of time, it loses its appeal.
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u/Quiet_Compote4651 8h ago
My daughter in law drinks her same drink all day, even after the ice is melted. Doesn’t look appealing to me either, but 🤷♀️….
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u/Beginning_Ocelot7394 3h ago
I do this. I’m just not a fast drinker, unless it’s water. I’m a sipper. It takes me at least a couple of hours to finish a drink. Coffee, alcohol, soda, etc. my coffee always has milk or creamer, and I’ve never gotten sick from it. It makes no sense why you’re so concerned by it.
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u/cyprinusDeCarpio 3h ago
I'd only be concerned if she were wasting the food, but it looks like she's just a representative of slow drinkers inc. (of which i am the CEO)
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u/Scared-Currency288 31m ago
Fellow slow drinker here and this would be perfectly normal for me. The only thing I can destroy quickly is a milkshake for some reason.
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u/spaceglitter000 7h ago
I’ve had friends who do this and it baffles me too. I finish my drinks fast. I assume it’s their adhd or something.
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u/NoneOfThisMatters_XO I’m pink today 7h ago
My friend does this. Orders a latte and sips on it all day. I don’t really get it either.
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u/GiraffePretty4488 7h ago
I only like milk when it’s super fresh and cold and doesn’t start getting that warm milk taste… but my spouse likes it better when the milk jug has been in the fridge for the better part of a week and gets that not-quite-off-but-getting-there flavour.
If I leave a coffee milk drink out by accident, I know I can just put it in the fridge for him and he’ll love to have it later. It’s great.
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u/420cat-craft-gamer69 7h ago
I'm similar, so personally: Drink too fast = hurt stomach, and sad my treat was gone too fast. I want to savor and enjoy and have it last as long as possible. (As someone who didn't get treats very often growing up). I don't care if it's gotten watery or melty. Im still enjoying knowing I have it and can sip it.
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u/britneys_bigtoe 7h ago
the other day i accidentally took a drink from a coffee from the day before
i nearly cried but i didn't get sick
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u/uPcountrY64 7h ago
brah, i take at least half a day to drink one of those or one of that… no reason to rush
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u/Minyumenu13 5h ago
I do this all the time with iced drinks. My family always comments about me still having a drink. Often I get caught up doing something and forget I have a drink.
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u/BIRDsnoozer 4h ago
I have the opposite problem and drink all my drinks way too fast.
If I have a hot coffee, once its temp gets low enough for me to gulp rather than sip, its a matter of minutes before it's gone.
When coworkers want to have a coffee break with me, theyre always surprised at how quick my coffee is gone, and they have barely touched theirs. IMO its because I dont smoke, and some of them do, so theyre sipping less often. Also im quieter than them. I tend to liaten while theyre venting about something, and I think out the things I say for longer.
But im a coffee maniac. Ive resorted to drinking mostly decaf, because I know Im going to drink like 5 or 6 in a day, and full caf in all those is going to make me crazy.
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u/naylessiexe 3h ago
some people just like having a beverage companion. it's less a drink and more a little guy that accompanies her through the day, and at some point she gives him a dignified burial in the sink
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u/ChooChooChaboog 7h ago
Even if it does curdle it’s probably fine - just turning into yogurt or cheese. How do you think people survived before refrigerators?
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u/ObviousToe1636 6h ago
You seem to be emphasizing the dairy more than anything else. Do you have the same reaction when it’s a nondairy drink?
I had a friend that always drank only half. If she got a big one, she’d finish half. And then if she got a small one, which was roughly half of the big one, she’d still only have half. Whatever, fine, her money.
I briefly dated a man I met through Hinge that would pack up more than half his plate when we were out to eat. If it was a budget thing or a medical thing and he told me about it or if it was occasional, I think it would have been okay. But he always brushed it off and the rest of the date he’d have this styrofoam container from the restaurant with his leftovers. He carried it around outside for several hours in 105°F (40°C) heat. Even if it wasn’t a food safety issue, it was cumbersome and awkward. Equally awkward was that this meant I ate more than him on EVERY date.
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u/Mindless-Leg-3365 4h ago
I don't mean to be radical or anything but why don't you just ask her why she does that and state what it is that bothers you about it that you're concerned that the milk will spoil or something else. Of course it does depend on how close of friendship you have. IDK. things like that drives me nuts. I understand that's why you're asking that here. you know it may be that she really likes those drinks, that she wants to prolong the pleasure, and if you're saying that the drinks are expensive maybe she can't afford them and is very grateful that you buy them. there's a lot of extra detail that I would need in order to unpack this further. Edited for spelling, grammar.
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u/desy_invisible 8h ago
I am a veeery slow drinker so I empathize with your friend, I even have a sort of drink warmer that I use when working so my drink can stay warm for longer.. however, no longer than say 2 hours. I think you have to ask your friend what is she doing with the drinks afterwards, it is puzzling haha I want to know too now!
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u/britneys_bigtoe 8h ago
she's finishing the drink bc not everyone has an abitrary time limit for drinks, especially if you have a warmer
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u/AgingLolita 7h ago
She bakes
She doesn't finish calorific drinks
What's her relationship like with food?
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u/MysticMintyMushroom 6h ago
The milk is watered down by the ice. Depending on how much ice, and how little milk; it’s a non issue. I drink really slow too. Liquid makes me feel really full so, if I’m also eating solid food, I can’t just gulp my drink, or I won’t be able to eat anything either. I try to get drinks I know I’ll like “flat” or watered down. I’ve had drinks last me 8+ hours. Don’t worry, I’m lactose intolerant.
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u/bluejay_way 6h ago
Buy her a Frost Buddy if you ever need to get her a gift. It takes me literally all day to drink an iced coffee and my Frost Buddy is the best purchase I’ve ever made lol
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u/ludicristi 6h ago
“She’s a great friend and it really doesn’t affect our friendship or anything” made me lol
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u/distancing 5h ago
I will take slow sips of my drink with dairy all day and then bring it home to finish the next day. Never had a problem. I love slowly sipping, and I love getting the biggest size to save money. (2 small drinks = 12$ but 1 large drink costs $8.)
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u/loverofnaps 5h ago
I know multiple people who buy Starbucks drinks regularly, have 2 or 3 sips, and never drink the rest. A few times a week, at least. I've asked them why but they don't have an answer. I think it's the hype of Starbucks maybe?
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u/BusyPooping 4h ago
I do this. I honestly think part is my adhd brain. I just forget to drink, but it’s nice knowing I have it in case I need a drink.
I might drink 12-20 oz in an entire working day and I know because of how much I have left in my energy drink.
It’s so bad, but I get it.
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u/pantherscheer2010 4h ago
I get an iced americano with oat milk at 8am before I leave for work and don’t usually finish it until around 4pm. it’s iced. it stays cold way longer than you seem to think and if it starts to get too close to room temp I just grab an ice cube or two from the work fridge. some people are just slow drinkers.
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u/UntrustedProcess 4h ago
She is a match for one of my sons that does the exact same thing. He will fully intend to drink it later, but won't.
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u/flirtyfrench_woman 4h ago
I will order a latte, sip on our for hrs, take it home, put in fridge, and then drink the following day, where it takes me another couple hrs. My coworker finds it gross. I don't care. I bought it. I'm not wasting it and I will always drink it. You do you, I'll do me.
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u/ComfortableCall3912 3h ago
They just replace the ice with whipped cream huh. That’s quite interesting, never seen that before.
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u/soaker 1h ago
lol people are taking you so seriously. I get it, a couple of my friends have eating or drinking habits that make me think “huh. That’s interesting.” It always has be wondering if there are things I do that get people head scratching. Like you said, it’s not a big deal, just an observation.
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u/Efficient_Day_9869 15m ago
I do this too. Sometimes I think I want the drink. My brain wants the drink. But my stomach doesn’t want it or not to the point where I will down it quickly.
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u/poisonedkiwi 7h ago
Does she do this with all food items, or just coffees? I take a long time to drink iced coffees too (they're quite filling imo) but ordering food while out with friends, just to throw it away hours later after the hangout could be concerning. Could also just be a sign that your friend is wasteful, or a very slow eater.
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u/geninmel 5h ago
Thing with food and drinks that I have finally learned, especially buying them or having them out, is the experience of them is the same no matter how much of it you consume. If you want a drink but only enjoy half of it and continuing to consume it rescues the enjoyment then it actually becomes a waste.
We are still subconsciously in the mindset of if we don’t consume it we might die of starvation
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u/RAZRr1275 6h ago
Don't think anyone has mentioned this but gotta remember caffeine is a drug and everyone has different natural tolerance levels. Some people can pound coffee all day some people can't get through a cup without uncomfortable things like anxiety, increased heart rate etc like anyone would have when they take too much of a stimulant
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u/buttercupfitz 7h ago
Milk isn't dangerous that fast. Some people prefer drinks to be lukewarm. maybe her teeth are sensitive to temperature? Maybe she goes home and adds ingredients she's ashamed of for whatever reason. Maybe she always has to pee and drinks make it feel worse. I could go on