I'm 21 years old, and I genuinely have no idea what I'm doing with my life anymore. I feel like everyone around me is graduating college, starting their careers, and moving forward, while I'm sitting here with only about 30% of my degree completed and still questioning what I even want to do.
I originally started college studying Applied Health Sciences, but eventually switched over to business. Right now, I'm double majoring in Finance and Global Supply Chain Management, but I've also been considering switching to Finance and Information Systems.
The funny thing is, I thought switching to business school would make my life easier. I kept seeing videos and people online talking about how easy business majors have it compared to other majors. Well, that has NOT been my experience. 😭 Business school is actually hard, at least for me, and I'm starting to question whether this is even something I genuinely want to pursue.
I'm honestly considering going back to community college because I don't see the point in spending thousands of dollars on a degree I'm not even sure I want. I've also thought about taking a year off from school and just working.
Luckily, I got my CNA certification back in high school, so I could always go back to working as a CNA for a year while I figure things out. I've also been looking into LPN programs because nursing offers decent job security and income, but I'm scared that LPN school is going to be just as difficult, if not harder, than what I'm currently doing.
And if I'm being completely honest, I have absolutely ZERO motivation for school anymore. I don't know what happened to me.
In high school, I was so locked in. I cared about my grades, I was motivated, and I actually had goals. Even during my freshman year of college, I was doing pretty well.
Then things took a turn.
I experienced cannabis-induced psychosis after I started smoking marijuana, which completely disrupted my education and my life. Unfortunately, I ended up experiencing psychosis a second time after using marijuana again. I've since stopped smoking and have been clean for a while now.
I'm not mentioning this for sympathy, but just to provide some context as to why my college journey has been so complicated and why I'm only about 30% finished with my degree at 21.
I feel like I lost the motivated version of myself somewhere along the way, and I don't know how to get her back.
I've also considered social work because I genuinely enjoy helping people, but from what I've researched, the earning potential isn't that great unless you pursue a master's degree and become licensed. And the thought of committing to even more years of school when I'm already struggling with motivation is overwhelming.
Another option I've been exploring is getting into supply chain without finishing my degree. I've heard that you don't necessarily need a bachelor's degree to break into logistics or supply chain, so I've been applying to a TON of entry-level positions. Unfortunately, I haven't heard back from any of them.
I've also considered joining the Air Force. However, I spoke to someone currently serving who advised me against joining if my main priority is completing my education. They explained that school isn't necessarily prioritized while you're serving, although the GI Bill can be beneficial afterward. So now I'm second-guessing that option too.
And here's another thing I regret.
I used to work at Target, and they offered a program that would pay for my college education online as long as I continued working there. That honestly could have been such a good opportunity for me. But around that time, I experienced psychosis and ended up completely ghosting my job.
Looking back, I wish I had reached out and explained what happened, but I didn't. It's been a long time, and I honestly doubt they'd ever hire me again.
I just feel like I've made so many mistakes, missed so many opportunities, and wasted so much time.
The hardest part is that I genuinely WANT to be successful. I want a stable career, financial independence, and a comfortable life. Ideally, I'd love to eventually make at least $70k–$100k, but I don't even know what career I want anymore.
I'm not afraid of working hard at a job. I actually enjoy learning through hands-on experience. It's the constant studying, exams, homework, and pressure of school that I feel completely burnt out from.
I keep going back and forth between finishing my business degree, switching majors again, going to LPN school, returning to community college, taking a gap year, or just entering the workforce.
And meanwhile, time keeps passing.
I know 21 isn't old, but when you're watching people your age graduate and start their lives while you still feel like you're at square one, it's really hard not to compare yourself.
I feel like such a disappointment to myself, and sometimes I worry that I'm disappointing my family too.
I guess I'm posting this because I genuinely need advice, especially from people who have been in similar situations.
Has anyone else completely lost their motivation for college after previously being a good student? Did you take a break, switch careers, pursue a trade, or eventually push through and finish your degree?
If you were in my position, would you stay in college, go back to community college, take a year off to work, or pursue something like an LPN program?
I just want to find something that gives me stability and a decent income without spending the rest of my twenties switching between degrees I don't even know if I want.
I feel so lost, and I really don't know what my next step should be.