Fearful advoidant,

[u/Own-Ball-9577]

So with a advoidant in the honeymoon phase.,things were good at first 7mo in I noticed the shift , longer to respond much later than he had been

Let it go on and I said we need to talk

They say when you do this is not productive . I agree they look for ways to deflect

Mine said your acting uppity. Anyway I walked out on him.primping to go out. And as he says to chill

2 days later a text. Not acknowledging what happened

Picked up where he left off

Just like nothing had happen, that was the first time. We went for round 2. No contact, you do contact me I won't contact you. Twice 3 wks he popped up

again. I ignored late text at 2 you already know. When you know he reaches our again 1 wk later acked normal like no time or thing came up between us

No accountability ever with a advoidant

He sends a text telling me he's on his way to another state. Mind you he told me this over a month ago he was moving.

..He left for better pay and opportunities, i get that. You text me and send a Pic of you being driven to your new destination

.the biggest flex I replied cool ,calm and collect. No drama, no pleading, not acting like a pick me

This is what they expect, you to fall apart I acted unbothered.and wished him well In his travel

I said to him safe travels

When he said he was relocating, I said that's good

Ladies and Gentlemen, guard your hearts. Look for the signs , trust your instincts they will never stear you wrong

If you keep questioning the inconsistencies that is ypu que to leave. Unless they sit in their stuff

, they will keep being in that loop and carry you with them

There not all bad there is just so much to go through with an advoidant. Their love language is sometimes just holding your hand or a tight hug

Its not always about the intamacy, and they will tell you that the norm they want live. To give it and recieve it

They can't process the closeness . Its like pinand needles

So they pull away, to recalibrate their system. They detache no contact so they can p process their feel I ngs. Mine came back 3wks twice. Everyone is different., this is what I went through

You will be I okay, they will show you who they are. They do little things .Not something on a grand scale . Thats how they show love. Holding your hand .

You donr have ro put up anything from them

Set boundaries and stick to them.

Hope this helps .A.

[u/Otherwise_Leather235]

This is my situation as well,
Even the moving states and being inconsistent wanting me back in his life, makes me think there was another girl, we were in no contact when he left he tried to reach out before leaving but I had him blocked, we talked for a few weeks every day while he was traveling then he became inconsistent again.