Last night the town my parents live in held the second annual Rocky Horror screening at their movie theater.

My mom first introduced me to Rocky Horror when I was 11 years old, and growing up it was the space where I felt the most free to dress in ways I would never dress normally. Ironically for most of my youth, it was the only place I was comfortable in heels, stockings, low cut tops that showed off my breasts etc.

For years I actually held onto one pair of heels, one bra and one pair of fishnets expressly so I could wear them to Rocky Horror.

Last year, at almost 3 months post op, I went up during the costume contest during the first annual screening, and took my shirt off in public for the very first time.

I was so excited I forgot the clever line I was going to say to justify it in the contest (that I, with my fresh scars, was in costume as someone who had given not just my left tit, but both of them, to go up the laboratory).

Way back in the 2000s, my college ended every spring semester with a Rocky Horror screening. As my top surgery drew near, a half forgotten memory of a younger student at the screening at the end of my Senior year began to come back to me. He had top surgery during the school's winter break, and had gone to Rocky Horror dressed as Rocky. He looked so fucking happy, and told anyone and everyone who commented on his costume that he had always been the kind of guy who enjoyed taking his shirt off, but now he finally could be that guy for real.

I should also say that when they retired, my parents moved to the town my college used to be in (the school moved to another campus/closed depending on who you ask).

So for this year's Rocky Horror screening, in honor of that memory from nearly 20 years ago, I put together my own Rocky costume. The organizers actually personally thanked me today for being such a huge part of the night last night. It really was such an incredible experience.

Don't dream it, be it.

Hi all! I've been trying to figure out how to write this post for a long while now, but the problem has gotten more consistent as time passes and I'm coming to the end of my considerable patience.

I live in the Pacific NW, in the Portland metro area, which is pretty famously liberal & makes a big deal out of being accepting to trans people. I'm bald with a full beard, and I haven't been misgendered out in public for nearly a decade. Unfortunately, despite all the clinics in my area having rainbow and progress flag stickers everywhere, the front desk staff at every medical facility I walk into constantly ask me if I'm "legally female."

I changed the gender markers on all of my IDs back in 2015, and my birth certificate a few years ago. I know they're actually trying to ask me if I'm afab, so I say that I'm legally male but I was assigned female at birth. They act confused, ask to see my ID (Sex:M) and my insurance card (Sex: M). Then they sigh and tell me I'm checked in. Then while my vitals are taken, the nurse asks if I'm female. I explain again. Then the doctor comes in, and if I'm lucky they'll ask "so you're transgender, correct?" but some just mark all my paperwork with an F and she/her me all the way through their client notes.

I've brought caseworkers and friends to appointments before, to call people out for being weird, but they never catch the issue.

The emergency room is the worst repeat offender. Unfortunately, I go to the ER once or twice a year. Every time I check in I get a patient bracelet with an F on it. I've asked to have ot changed, and they just print me another bracelet with an F on it.The F has confused many nurses, registration clerks, lab techs, medical assistants and doctors. I've asked several different people at the ER why this happens, and they've all given me incorrect answers.

— "Insurance purposes" (my gender marker is nowhere in my insurance information; I've called my insurance company several times about this very issue because some offices request my 'Insured gender marker" for reasons that are never explained).

— "If you need a blood transfusion, giving you male blood could cause birth defects if you were to get pregnant" (Fully incorrect. Blood doesn't get sorted by gender because there's literally no difference in the stuff other than slight variations in red blood cell count)

— "For testing viability" (I get that you're going to pregnancy test me regardless of why i'm here, because the protocol is pathetically obsessed with my uterus, but I've asked if my gender marker in the system would change if I had a hysterectomy, and I just got a chuckle like I'd asked a rhetorical, philosophical question).

Have any of you figured out how to answer these people so they'll stop half-misgendering you in public? I've asked my obgyn-endocrinologist, who works almost exclusively with trans men, and she doesn't have any ideas. Do you have a stock answer? A little business card you slide over telling them to knock it off? A joke that gets the point across without coming off as too indignant?

The best I've ever seen someone react to an F in my medical paperwork and a beard on my face is to look at me and ask, very casually, "do you have a uterus, my friend?" All my love to that person. I wish they could telepathically teach everyone in the world that trick.

Anyhow, thanks for reading all this, & if you have any tips I'd appreciate it. Despite how liberal this area thinks it is, there's still a fair number of bigots and assholes to deal with. Everyone (except my obgyn/endo) asks this stupid and potentially dangerous question in public — Allergists, ENTs, Physiotherapists, Gastroenterology, Sleep clinics, Psychiatry, Cardiology, Neurology, Primary Care, Phlebotomy — and I'm just. So. Tired of it.

Hope you all had a good weekend! What was the best part of your weekend?

Finally felt like a weekend for me lol

First selfie here. 6 months on T, so the changes are minimal. Finally found myself after 36 years.

Happy Spooky Season ya'll from this scare actor

Autumn is definitely here (other than the 80° F day earlier last week).

Romie survived her annual check up! She threw up in her carrier on the car ride there (her least favorite part of any vet trip), but after the vet cleaned her off and checked her out they concluded that she's in great health, especially for her age. The lump on her shoulder just ended up being a little cyst. They drained it and gave her her anti-kennel cough shot (I always forget the name of the vaccine itself). She was a trooper, like she always is. Didn't make a sound even while being poked and prodded for the whole visit. Only cried while she was in the car.

The new job is going great! I adapted to the late night schedule way smoother than I thought i would. And it's much easier work in a much safer location while still paying more than the old job.

My medicaid is in jeopardy, but the new job actually has benefits that should be worth it. I'll just have to make sure they cover my t injections AND a very important anti-psycotic med that has really helped with my mental health episodes (that costs over 7,000$ per shot). Fingers crossed THAT all works out, else I might be screwed.

So background:

I'm 40, egg cracked at 37. I've been socially out with online friends, my daughter, and a few family members, all of which support me, for almost 3 years. Outside of pronoun and name usage, a hysterectomy, and wardobe, I haven't been able to advance my transition. I live in the SE USA, so I figured my chances were slim that I'd even find gender affirming care without moving away from family and the home I've had for 35 years.

I have a few medical issues, and I saw a new endocrinologist today for my hypothyroidism. I knew I was in good hands when we spent a good 10 minutes of the appointment bantering about the cons of AI and how she thinks Luigi Mangione should be, "the patron saint of healthcare reform." I mentioned amen to that and how I can only hope it gets better, especially for trans healthcare. She of course asked casually if I knew a trans person, and I felt comfortable enough to out myself.

Mind you, the last time I came out to a medical professional was 2-ish years ago, to my therapist, who told me, quote, "Do you think you just think you're trans because you're depressed and want something different in your life?" Needless to say, that was my last visit with her, but it gave me a very real fear of outing myself down here. It was night and day with this dr today.

She told me I need to get some baseline bloodwork, and I need an official gender dysphoria diagnosis for insurance, but she's referring me to a trans-friendly psychiatrist she knows well. She also said if for whatever reason I have issues with getting my scrip, she is licensed in a northern state also and can get it filled and shipped in a worst case scenario.

I cried in the car. I still can't believe it happened. I advocated for myself and was validated for once. I would die for this woman, truly. She said she doesn't advertise she offers this care because she knows where we are, but that she was born and raised here and lived all over before coming back to practice here. It's going to be a long journey, but I finally have a medical road to travel, something I thought I'd never be able to achieve without moving. I'm sure it'll be tough, but today, I think I'll take my daughter out for dinner because this deserves a celebration.

Y'all. I am exactly two months into T and my vocal cords have apparently decided to skip the tutorial and go straight to the boss fight??? /exaggeration

I was playing around with my pitch tracker today just trying to see how low I could push it, and I managed to hit 134hz. Which is a C3 I think... My brain just went "Sir??? Who gave you permission to drop that fast?!"

The funniest part is that my vocal range is currently absolute chaos because I can still hit like an A4 when I am baby-talking my cat or doing obnoxious, nasally cartoon voices. So my current vocal range is almost two full octaves of pure, unadulterated nonsense. ^{(Now if only I could actually control it outside of sirens})

I'm HYPED!

^\IMAGINE A FERAL OPOSSUM IMAGE HERE... because I don't have a good one])

I graduated college in 2017. I came out to myself in 2020, to others in late 2020, and started medical transition in late 2021.

I don't live that far from the city I attended college in, and I don't go there that often, but when I do, I always feel off-step. Its hard to describe, but it always makes me feel like I've regressed back to myself then, and it fills me with a melancholy of sorts. Its especially odd because I don't generally have issues with myself younger, like I don't mind my mom's pictures of me when I was very little. It really just happens in this specific place. And I'm curious if anyone else experiences that.

Before a bunch of people come in here giving the minoxidil/finasteride “tips,” I’m very aware of all the various meds, hairpieces, hair transplants, etc. I’ve been bombarded by advertising for the last year or so, and I’ve become overly fixated on my hair. I’m well researched on it, am taking a half dose of something, but I don’t like how I feel on the full dose. And unsure if topicals worked or not. Either way: these products make me pay attention to my hair more than I’d like. Basically I do not want advice on how to avoid baldness.

Now that thats out of the way, onto the title question. How many of you totally shave your head? Do any of you accept the horseshoe pattern? I kinda think balding looks better on some and totally bald on others. It depends. 🤷‍♂️

I’ve been seeing hella content on hair transplants lately from influencers, and a bunch of ads about hair loss constantly, and I think they’ve impacted my self esteem more than balding has alone. When I began balding 6 years ago, I shaved my head a couple times a year to accept it. I looked…okay. Have been told a trillion times over I look better with hair, and it’s gotten to me a bit.

Anyway, share your bald stories here. Have any of you fell into advertising traps and become more insecure while using the various drug cocktails?

How many of you rock a balding look vs totally shaving?

Did balding impact your dating life much? How many of you have been able to find a partner while bald?

Wondering if anyone else has experienced this:

Every now and then I get terrible, post-IUD-insertion level cramps like 2-3 hours after orgasm. It doesn't happen every time and when it does happen I'll get a little bit of cramping right afterwards but then a few hours later it's terrible. I have and am treated for vaginal atrophy (I use the tablets twice a week) and that helped a little but this still happens.

If anyone else has dealt with this, was it pelvic floor stuff or uterine atrophy or something else?

I want a hysterectomy for this but only if it would actually fix it, I don't really care about having a uterus one way or the other but I want this fucking pain to stop.

I use the topical version. I've had hair loss problems for over a decade, long before I started T. I've been using minoxidil for maybe a year and a half now. Every now and then, one of my dogs will have a terrible cough in the night. We've been to the vet to check to see if he has a heart condition (my oldest dog died of congestive heart failure that he'd had for years) but thry found nothing. I realize that he only coughs like that on the days I apply minoxidil in the evening (I can be pretty inconsistent).

So, it's gotta go. I don't want to take yhe oral version because I don't want unnatural hair growth on all parts of my body. I'm approaching two years on T, and it's been fun seeing how my body might have changed naturally if I'd had testosterone puberty to begin with. Besides that, I can already grow a beard, and for different reasons, including the fact that I'm still not out in a lot of spaces, I really don't want a thicker one right now.

I'm bummed, if I'm honest. Idk how people with spouses and kids transition. It's a time of self discovery, but you can't do it at the expense of other people/your dependents. Transitioning in your 30s is kind of great and kind of sucks at the same time. Like, I feel more secure about some things as a adult, but at the same time, I recognize that certain aspects of self exploration, and the ability to be (healthily) self-centered ended in my mid 20s. Sucks lol

Hi folks,

because of a health condition, testosterone might be risky in my case. I wonder whether it's possible to medically transition without testosterone.

Has anyone had a beard transplant and / or had thickened their eyebrows? If not, have you heard of someone who did so?

My main concern is the vocal surgery. Not only did I hear of several failed vocal surgeries, but what if the voice is not deep enough?

I must say that testosterone has several advantages over transitioning without it, like muscle growth and no menstruation. You know, I do fitness on a regular basis, but I have gained zero muscle yet.

Thanks for reading and have a good week.