I lost my future overnight

[u/Dandanaynay]

At the age of 37 I got engaged to the love of my life. He was kind, patient, reassuring my biggest fan and my best friend.
We met 7 years ago due to a glitch on tinder, we both set the app on local and yet we somehow matched.
At first we remained friends since non of us wanted a long distance relationship but over time we decided to try it.
We lived thousands km away from each other. It was very tough, we tried to meet at least three-four times either visiting each other or meeting on a midway country.
Eventually he finally managed to visit me first and a year later I visited him and we lived together for half a year when by the end of the visit he proposed to me and promised that it would be the last time we’re going to separate.
That was back in May this year.
Since then we were preparing to get married and planning on moving in together and have kids which in turn prompted us to do thorough health check since we’re in our late 30’s which at the moment I’m almost done with.
We video chat everyday and for the past two weeks he was having health issues, mostly with breathing and almost fainting. Last time we chatted I was insisting that he change the healthcare provider and get checked again, he assured me that he was fine and will take care of it.
Yesterday he was gone from a heart attack on the night of 20-21st of August leaving me with empty promises and all by myself.
He never smoked, rarely drank alcohol and was consistently going to the gym to lose weight.
He was my best friend and I don’t even know if anyone would love me like he did. I’m so lost.

I am with my family, my friends and his are messaging me so I’m not alone. It’s even more crushing that we had so little time together.

Chocolate, cold cuts, cheese, mango and blueberries and the keyboard he got me.

[u/Hairy_Interactions]

Do you know what genetic testing was done? My brother died of aortic dissection at 33, my dad found he had an aneurysm (descending I believe) and experienced dissection during the surgery. The cardiologist encouraged us to do genetic testing and… the test I did, was negative to much of anything. They said “maybe there is a mutation on something this test doesn’t check, or maybe it was coincidental” and left it at that 🥵

[u/BeautifulHomework76 → u/Hairy_Interactions]

MYH11 Gene mutation. Can be detected via blood test.

[u/Hairy_Interactions → u/BeautifulHomework76]

Ours did test that, and it was negative. Oh well. One day I’m sure it’ll all make sense.

Take care, thank you for sharing

[u/esotericbatinthevine → u/Hairy_Interactions]

They checked for vascular type EDS too correct?

I have vascular issues and a family history of them. When getting evaluated for EDS they specifically checked for vascular. I don't have it so I'm in the "we don't know what's causing your EDS" group, aka hypermobility type. Apparently a lot of us have vascular issues of unknown cause but doctors have only started to pay attention in the last five or so years.

[u/Hairy_Interactions → u/esotericbatinthevine]

I can’t remember if they checked for vascular EDS. They definitely checked hyper mobility and like, limb length? Said we (little brother and I) don’t have the physical indicators of Marfans or Loeys-Dietz

[u/esotericbatinthevine → u/Hairy_Interactions]

I know the degree of hypermobility can be highly variable and being very fit can mask symptoms particularly when younger. But it sounds like they did proper hypermobility testing, which is good.

That's frustrating to not have answers. There is a lot we still don't know about genetics and the human body in general.