I lost my future overnight

[u/Dandanaynay]

At the age of 37 I got engaged to the love of my life. He was kind, patient, reassuring my biggest fan and my best friend.
We met 7 years ago due to a glitch on tinder, we both set the app on local and yet we somehow matched.
At first we remained friends since non of us wanted a long distance relationship but over time we decided to try it.
We lived thousands km away from each other. It was very tough, we tried to meet at least three-four times either visiting each other or meeting on a midway country.
Eventually he finally managed to visit me first and a year later I visited him and we lived together for half a year when by the end of the visit he proposed to me and promised that it would be the last time we’re going to separate.
That was back in May this year.
Since then we were preparing to get married and planning on moving in together and have kids which in turn prompted us to do thorough health check since we’re in our late 30’s which at the moment I’m almost done with.
We video chat everyday and for the past two weeks he was having health issues, mostly with breathing and almost fainting. Last time we chatted I was insisting that he change the healthcare provider and get checked again, he assured me that he was fine and will take care of it.
Yesterday he was gone from a heart attack on the night of 20-21st of August leaving me with empty promises and all by myself.
He never smoked, rarely drank alcohol and was consistently going to the gym to lose weight.
He was my best friend and I don’t even know if anyone would love me like he did. I’m so lost.

I am with my family, my friends and his are messaging me so I’m not alone. It’s even more crushing that we had so little time together.

Chocolate, cold cuts, cheese, mango and blueberries and the keyboard he got me.

[u/colorkiller]

get yearly physicals and get eye exams!! if you have a good optometrist they can see your heart health based on your eyes!

[u/notafrumpy_housewife → u/colorkiller]

Dental checkups, too! Gum disease is linked to heart health and possibly even some types of cancer.

[u/Any-Assistance8169 → u/notafrumpy_housewife]

My dentist was the first person that said I should get checked out by a doctor since my gum health had deteriorated since my last 6 month cleaning. The doctor found really bad anemia (I just thought it was laziness and/or depression) - which led to my cancer diagnosis.

[u/Redaktorinke → u/Any-Assistance8169]

My dentist noticed my mast cell disease. My mouth is a fucking mess when I'm not taking lots of antihistamines.

[u/lochnessx → u/Redaktorinke]

Mine clocked an autoimmune issue that my doctors aren’t acknowledging. I have a positive ANA and that’s just… normal? To my doctors? I have a ton of mouth sloughing and that was their immediate first thought, was that this is a real issue. It was super validating.

[u/justasque → u/lochnessx]

A friend has an autoimmune skin condition. His dermatologist figured it out after a biopsy (after other treatments weren’t helping). But his dentist also saw signs of an issue (sloughing, etc) and referred my friend to a specialist dentist, who also did testing that confirmed that the dental issues were from the same autoimmune condition as the skin issues. He’s since had some other issues that might be related (diverticular bleed, and possibly some nasal issues). Bulbous pemphigoid is the condition; apparently it’s relatively rare. The specialist dentist said there were several autoimmune conditions that could cause similar symptoms. My friend is lucky to live near a city with some excellent medical facilities, otherwise I doubt either of the docs would have dug deep enough to figure out his condition. Message me if this might be your issue and you have questions.

[u/madame-maitre-d → u/[deleted]]

Hey, seems you're new here! 👋 🥰 You need to take 10 lil seconds to become an approved user to participate in r/GirlDinnerDiaries. We're holding your comment for review til then.

2 quick steps:

1. If you're a dude, just let us know by replying "dude joining" to this comment. If not, reply with the classic pillowfort clubhouse password: "girls rule". 😇
2. Pick a user flair HERE. Flair options are sorted by Girly, Genderqueer, or Dude.

That's it! We'll restore your comment super fast! Thanks for stopping by 💕

[u/kurtnaib → u/Redaktorinke]

Wait, please do explain what you mean by a mess. Because I have these constant cuts and sores in my mouth from my lips to the back of my throat that only go away when I take antihistamines. My doctor says I’m overreacting but I’ve had it since 2019.