r/MuslimLounge • u/PracticalMotor6579 • 15h ago

Support/Advice need advice pls

as-salamu alaykum. i really need some advice because i feel so overwhelmed. i’m 18 and just started university. we were never in an actual relationship, but i’ve liked a guy for a while and confessed at the end of high school. we decided to go completely cold turkey over the summer to keep things halal.

it has been months of total silence. we talked about a student nikkah in the future, but we go to different universities now.

the boundaries feel so constraining. some days i try to stay strong, pray, and read quran. but right now the heartbreak is hitting me so hard. i am constantly overthinking how this will work and worrying we will just lose feelings after all this sacrifice.

i feel stuck in a never ending cycle. has anyone else been in a situation like this? how do you survive this waiting phase? please be gentle, i'm really struggling.

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u/Iamfeel26 14h ago

Wa alaykum as Salaam,

You are very young and will surely change and grow in your personalities and outlooks. The worst thing you can do is dwell and long for something that is simply not possible to pursue in the right way. It reminds me of something I wrote once upon a time...

I won't burn, if the embers of hope still fester in this sorry soul of mine, like wind in the rain, which splashes water upon my face, the comforts of life seem in a far away place, and in the rain, I won't turn my face away. Why should I cower? Why would I hide? Would I die a little inside knowing, that what the future holds is not what is meant for me or would I feel alive knowing that what was supposed to be, will be?