r/PoursTea • 🫖 Mod ☕️ • 14h ago

⚠️Trigger Warning⚠️ Calls It

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297

u/wasted-degrees 13h ago

I wish the “not all men” crowd could self-police as effectively as the No Kings protestors. I remember seeing a few videos where the protestors were peacefully doing their thing until one dude tried to incite violence or vandalism, at which point the rest of the protestors turned on that dude, called him out, kicked him out of the group and turned him over to police.

The best way to prove that “I’m not like that” and keep your own identity distinct from the bad actors you want to avoid being associated with is to shut that kind of shit down immediately upon recognition.

32

u/Previous-Artist-9252 12h ago

I mean this question openly and honestly.

How do you expect your average man on the street to shut down this behavior?

I am a 40 year old man and not anywhere near dorms or fraternities. When I was in college, I was often the young woman getting raped so I am hardly blind the fact that these are common occurrences. However, as a middle aged queer trans social worker, I am not involved with men engaging in this behavior.

Or, to paraphrase someone more articulate than me, if there are good men, they are not going to be in the group chat about raping women. Those groups have already self selected those men out of their social organizing. And I am happy to have been selected out of such peer groups.

-1

u/Ashamed-Finding4657 9h ago

Why not just keep seated and keep your mouth shut?

Why make it all about you with the "not all men" whine?

2

u/Previous-Artist-9252 9h ago

Yes of course why would anyone ask why they could do good when they can just shut up?