r/Suburbanhell • u/DonJohnson1986 • Feb 27 '26
Question Did social media kill suburban status?
As a kid from the 90's and 00's I remember this is what kept score of who won or lost life. Now there's literally zero status for it in America, just whoever is the latest social media star. So it begs the question why should I have to keep a perfect yard "for appearances" if all people really care about is laying on the couch watching influencers on their phones? You can do that in the trailer park lol.
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u/RCW4661100 Feb 27 '26
The truth is suburban mansions just suck. Three kids in daycare with a house in the city is the new fuck you money
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u/Ok_Vanilla_424 Feb 27 '26
Unfortunately, urban cities demand dual high income esrners, which then requires day care or a nanny system.
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u/SBSnipes Feb 27 '26
My uncle has 4 kids, they have a nanny and his wife stays at home, they've lived in a Condo in near north side Chicago and now have a good size house in Boston. But that's some solidly upper class stuff. A suburban mcmansion was upper middle
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Feb 27 '26
Easy 500k+ 1 income. But my guess is 1M+
Lived same area
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u/SBSnipes Feb 27 '26
He doesn't really talk about it but I'm pretty sure he was $500k+ in Chicago 10-15 years ago and is at least $750k+ right now.
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u/chocalicorn Feb 27 '26
It didn’t used to be this way
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u/Return-of-Trademark Mar 01 '26
Nor should it be. Most people don’t realize that cities subsidize the suburbs
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u/_lippykid Feb 27 '26
I worked at a massive fashion brand in NYC. My boss was a VP, his wife a senior VP, 2 kids, and they still couldn’t afford to buy a 3 bedroom apartment in the city.
In the rest of the country, walkable neighborhoods with a strong community, retail, restaurants etc are like rocking horse shit
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u/youburyitidigitup Feb 27 '26
What does rocking horse shit mean?
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u/rosemaryscrazy Feb 27 '26 edited Feb 27 '26
Yes, I’d like to know too but I’m guessing it’s like saying, “Bottle and Binky sht”
From context it looks like they are saying “Not playing in the big leagues stuck in diapers with a pacy..”
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u/atmowbray Feb 27 '26
What you’re really saying is people have upped their standards of what they consider rich because of social media. Back in the day your perspective on wealth was what’s around you so if you neighbor had a pool that might be rich to you. And that kid in school whose parents had a giant suburban mansion was MEGA rich. Now with social media and the top 0.01% getting the most clicks, everyone thinks you need a yacht or a lambo to be “rich” so that incudes the urban rich with their private schools etc. I literally saw a video where a guy asked a bunch of kids what a god salary was and they were saying like half a million dollars. 90% of them will feel like failures even if they become a doctor, attorney, software developer, etc.
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Feb 27 '26 edited Feb 27 '26
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u/OrneryYesterday7 Feb 27 '26
You’re nearly spot on, although most people can’t afford to live in America’s asshole anymore, either. FL has gotten expensive. The people I know heading south are now eyeing the Carolinas and maybe GA or TN.
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u/BMonad Feb 28 '26
This doesn’t make any sense. The “American Dream” of generations ago when any Americans who could afford it moved out to the suburbs in relatively smaller houses was in the good affordable times but people doing this now are in some sort of dystopian state? This post is all style, no substance. AI?
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u/Nurturedbynature77 Feb 27 '26
For sure but most people don’t have fuck you money. Ideally you have an acre in a walkable neighborhood with your own pool and tennis court and can put your kid in the stroller to go grab a croissant, then when dad is done with work you all have a beautiful family evening outside while the kids jump in the pool, dad puts some food on the grill and mom makes the salad.
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Feb 27 '26
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u/Nurturedbynature77 Feb 27 '26 edited Feb 27 '26
I was responding to a post about fuck you money. I know it’s basically impossible for find something like that. That’s why we end up giving up some of the things we want because we can’t have it all. Some people give up the walkscore for their own private pool, others give up the pool for the walkscore. If we don’t have fu money, we can’t have it all and should stop judging others so harshly. We are all out here doing the best we can, trying to make the best out of this experience called life.
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u/mikey3624 Feb 27 '26
In certain areas of the country houses like this are unaffordable. As for social media, I suppose it did kill suburban status for some younger generations. Don’t do something for status just do it because you want to
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u/steamed-apple_juice Feb 27 '26
I see the correlation OP is making... I just don't follow their logic on how they got there. "Laying on the couch watching influencers on their phones" is not all that people care about. They still want to "keep that perfect yard", but what that "yard" looks like today has changed from the 90s.
I do think social media played a role in reinvigorating city life, particularly with lifestyle and influencer content. But I think the deeper question is "why are these the lifestyles people are living and wanting to share?" Many people want to emulate the lives of the influencers they see.
You are right, over the decades, living this lifestyle in the suburbs is out of reach for many people. I do see how social media is glamourising city life in a way that wasn't represented in the media in generations past. This is resulting in the normalization and desire of urban living. A big house in the suburbs or the "suburban status" is no longer the dominant "desirable" lifestyle. Yes, many people still want that life, but it's not a collective goal like it was in generations past. That's what killed the suburban status.
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u/Zhombe Feb 27 '26
Grass is a sinkhole of waste. Started with people wanting to be Rockefellers and it’s gotten out of hand ever since.
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u/nonother Feb 27 '26
It started with European aristocracy, not wealthy Americans.
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u/Dpmurraygt Feb 27 '26
It’s funny that the part of being aristocracy we adopted wasn’t not working, it was grass that we have to maintain ourselves.
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u/PatchyWhiskers Feb 27 '26
The British middle classes wanted lawns to imitate the aristocracy, but the thing is, in Britain you can get a lush, smooth green lawn just by mowing it regularly. In most parts of the USA, the climate is not cooperative.
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u/DonJohnson1986 Feb 27 '26
It's so dumb. At least the dogs can appreciate it looking on the bright side...
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u/pastaman5 Feb 27 '26
Grass does make picking up dog poop easier…
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u/DonJohnson1986 Feb 27 '26
It doesn't but my dogs like the grass. My one dog in particular likes to roll around in it.
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u/frumperino Feb 27 '26
dogs do that in order to rub the smells and residuals of poop and dead animals in the grass on their own coats, olfactory fashion
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u/JifPBmoney_235 Feb 27 '26
People forget that there are places in this country where grass grows naturally
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u/Zhombe Feb 27 '26
Yes but I’m talking all those places (most by land mass) that grass is stupid expensive to keep golf course manicured. Way too much water waste, fertilizer, weed killers, and energy spent trying to keep it looking unnatural.
Enforced by dumb and dumber HOA non-sense.
Here, neighbors end up spending 5-10k every decade having to resod after a freeze nukes their non-freeze tolerant yards. I’ve overseeded mine with hybrid species that do better in drought and freeze but the only reason I get away with my more prairie than golf course is my neighbor across from me is on the board. And he knows the moment he gives me grief I’ll make his life hell. I also help him from time to time with broken sprinklers, doors, etc.
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u/booksareadrug Feb 27 '26
Yes, no one would ever want to do things on their lawns. That's crazy talk!
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u/prominorange Feb 27 '26
Yea, you think like this if you're chronically online. I feel people greatly underestimate the amount of people who barely use social media, if at all.
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u/DeepHerting Feb 27 '26
My brother in Christ, everyone is chronically online now. The people you think don't have Reddit brain have Instagram brain or Facebook brain or, God help us, Nextdoor brain.
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u/PovertyTourist69 Feb 27 '26
Yep some people are still stuck in the internet of 20 years ago. Everyone is online all the time now, “normies” know about the same shit as everyone else, at least below a certain age. Everyone is familiar with reddit, it’s not a niche site. Urbanism is extremely mainstream now, as it relates to this particular thread. And this is coming from someone who has a soft spot for well built suburbs
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u/LeviathonMt Feb 27 '26
No dude. Go outside and look around.
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u/DeepHerting Feb 27 '26
Look at what they’re doing on their downtime in any shop or office. Ride the bus home. Ask your retired mom what she does all day. Check on your kid’s activity when they’re supposed to be doing homework on their school laptop. Listen to the friggin’ President and Vice President of the United States and tell me the worst parts of Twitter aren’t constantly being beamed directly into their cerebral cortex. Nobody’s extremely online when everybody’s extremely online.
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u/prominorange Feb 27 '26
Nope, I've met a decent amount of millenials/gen z who just have facebook and only log in a few times a year, they barely even know what's going on with reddit or tiktok. 90% of their screen time is texting friends, not much in the way of doom scrolling. If you use internet slang around them they'll look at you like you're speaking Greek.
I 100% believe in dead internet theory and think a decent amount of activity you'll see on popular social media is from bots.
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u/WorkingItOutSomeday Feb 27 '26
I remember even 15 - 20 years ago young people were embarrassed of living in such places. Its not that its suburban but the suburban hell. I technically live in a burb but I have sidewalks and amenities.
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u/Unicycldev Feb 27 '26
The truth is most people still want this. It’s just not sustainable or the negative impacts are not well understood.
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u/Dpmurraygt Feb 27 '26
I think we’ve gotten better about recognizing the downsides. In Atlanta it means sprawl and unending traffic.
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u/IKnewThat45 Feb 27 '26
dallas too. i’m here for work right now and would rather die than have to drive around regularly.
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u/DonJohnson1986 Feb 27 '26
I don't know if they really do, most young women want an apartment in the city.
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u/cyanraichu Feb 27 '26
I'd love to see the numbers on this. Many of my peers (including a lot of young women) aspire to be a suburban mom
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u/PatchyWhiskers Feb 27 '26
Apartment in the city to hook the husband, then move to the suburbs to raise 3 perfect children.
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u/Boerkaar Feb 27 '26
Depends what demo you’re looking at. 20-somethings? Sure, apartment in the city. 30-somethings with kids? Then this looks a lot more attractive.
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u/Apprehensive-Ad-6620 Feb 27 '26
In East Asia a lot of young couples with kids want apartments in the city - they want older kids to be able to visit parks, museums, and libraries without a parent taghing along all the time.
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u/Prosthemadera Feb 27 '26
In Europe, people with families live in apartments. It's completely normal and even nice. Why is North America so different that anything but a single family homes is shameful?
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u/zippy_97 Feb 27 '26
Depends where in America you live! Big old homes split into several apartments and purpose build “triple deckers” are very common in New England.
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u/Nurturedbynature77 Feb 27 '26
I personally like outdoor living. I like my backyard to be an extension of my living room. And be outside watching tv or reading a book with my coffee while the kids run around the backyard and play in their mud kitchen.
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u/Prosthemadera Feb 27 '26
You can do all of that in an apartment. Again, people in Europe are doing that.
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u/cheesybugs5678 Feb 27 '26
People in America will go bananas if they see an unaccompanied child playing by an apartment.
It’s a low trust society, and if you are in the city you are expected to be accompanying your child in public 100% of the time until they are like 12-13 at least or else you are a bad parent, and might get the cops called on you.
So they’re either stuck inside with you in your tiny apartment, or you’re outside with them not completing your house chores.
If you have a suburban house with a yard you can let them run around there and not be judged for it.
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u/Prosthemadera Feb 27 '26
It’s a low trust society, and if you are in the city you are expected to be accompanying your child in public 100% of the time until they are like 12-13 at least or else you are a bad parent, and might get the cops called on you.
Same in the suburbs. Or when you walk around while black.
It's a weird country.
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u/cheesybugs5678 Feb 27 '26
Yeah but at least in the suburbs you probably have a private yard where the kids can run around while you watch them out the window.
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u/Prosthemadera Feb 27 '26 edited Feb 27 '26
Again: You can do all of that in an apartment. Again, people in Europe are doing that.
Also, people are always so focused on letting kids run around in their backyard. No talk about letting kids explore the neighbourhood or doings sports or hanging around with their friends wherever they want. It's just "keep the kids inside these walls". Why? Is the outside so dangerous or unappealing that the backyard is all they've got?
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u/Nurturedbynature77 Feb 27 '26
How can the kids run around in the backyard while living in an apartment? On the deck? Or you mean you go to the park? I like going to the park too but there’s something nice about just walking out your back door in pjs and slippers in private with your coffee while the kids enjoy some outdoor time.
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u/AStoutBreakfast Feb 27 '26
Americans are taught to want space and view owning a home as a symbol of success (the American dream…). There’s a perception (unfortunately often correct due to how our schools are funded) that the suburbs have better school systems as well so especially if you have kids there is usually a desire to live in the suburbs.
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u/Prosthemadera Feb 27 '26
There’s a perception (unfortunately often correct due to how our schools are funded) that the suburbs have better school systems as well so especially if you have kids there is usually a desire to live in the suburbs.
This is a remnant and modern continuation of segregation and white flight.
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u/exogenesis_symphony Feb 27 '26
thank you. i think going up in the suburbs is a big reason why americans are the way they are (lonely and maladjusted)
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u/StarManta Feb 27 '26
I'm 40 with a kid and the suburban house looks like a nightmare to me. My kid is going to be able to travel independently YEARS earlier than he'd ever be able to get a driver's license, for one, and loves to walk or take the train to new places around the city (with us). I can't imagine how much of an "iPad kid" he'd be if the only place he could ever play was that sterile green sheet of grass.
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u/GlitteringAntelope25 Feb 27 '26
This is ugly as sin and could never look attractive.
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u/shore_987 Feb 27 '26
Yeah I'm in my 30s now, this looks great! 10 years ago, never. Problem is it's unaffordable almost everywhere now.
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u/Wonderstruck13 Feb 27 '26
30 something with kids here and nope, absolutely not, would never take away my kids independence. These are just nice looking prisons. And there’s A LOT of kids in my building. I think things are actually changing and cities are becoming more desirable, only barrier is cost for a lot of people.
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u/This-is-obsurd Feb 27 '26
They def do not. If they think they do it’s bc they were manipulated into thinking that’s best for them. But it’s not.
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u/EvanFri Feb 27 '26
"Now there's literally zero status for it in America"
Is this even true? How can you possibly generalize that much? It is still the main type of housing being built, which at least implies, to some extent, that most market demand for housing is this type of housing. I understand the market and zoning laws are rigged in its favor, but market research generally sees this type of housing as the predominant preference in America.
Before I left the south 2-3 years ago, I witnessed rapid suburban development with beautiful forests being completely wiped out to make way for building a bunch of suburban subdivisions.
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u/shes-starting-over Feb 27 '26
I mean OP commented that “most young women would prefer the city” so I think we’re just dealing with a classic case of “chronically online edgy 19 year old redditor” here
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u/wasteoffire Feb 27 '26
You just grew up in a different world I guess. I had neighbors with perfect lawns growing up and we always just thought they were anti fun. It wasn't status to me, it was just overly controlling. My friends and I had to actively avoid playing in those yards when we would run around or else they might come out and yell at us
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u/scenicLiFeRest Feb 27 '26
I think modern social media idealizes the big city penthouse style with modern amenities and close accessibility
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Feb 27 '26
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u/Legoshi-Baby Feb 27 '26
I would’ve understood the draw when they were trolley neighborhoods. Now I just don’t get it. I don’t see why anyone would want to have to drive absolutely everywhere. Because that’s where things get unpredictable. Bad weather, car issue, intoxication, anything and you’re stuck.
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u/TYPICALFELLOW Feb 28 '26
If that's suburban then I've stumbled into an alternate dimension, that's a mansion in an upper class neighborhood.
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u/Grungemaster Feb 27 '26
The people maintaining big houses in the suburbs are usually the parents of the people gravitating toward and obsessing over influencers on social media. Different demographics, different definitions of success among their peers.
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u/Key-Juggernaut5695 Feb 27 '26
A bigger question is why do you care about status in the eyes of others? Why not choose what YOU like?
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u/ChocolateChingus Feb 27 '26
You got to get offline if you think people don’t care about this anymore.
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u/Leverkaas2516 Suburbanite Feb 27 '26
Now there's literally zero status for it in America
Flat lie, or at least confidently incorrect. Tens of millions have paid good money for this, many millions more want it but don't have it.
why should I have to keep a perfect yard "for appearances"
You shouldn't, if it's not important to you. It isn't to me, either.
if all people really care about is laying on the couch watching influencers
How many people do you really think this applies to?
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u/Flrg808 Feb 27 '26
No way man you don’t get it. The chronically online 19 year olds on this sub have it completely figured out. There’s no way anyone in any family or living situation would ever want this big house in a safe neighborhood with a yard for dogs and kids to play in. A dingy apartment within walking distance to my favorite restaurant and bookstore is the only way to live forever.
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u/collegeqathrowaway Feb 27 '26
For most people no. The vast majority of people will go to college, find a job regardless if it’s in a walkable town or not, and live near their job, and if they can afford it, they’ll go to the suburbs to raise kids for better schools.
I will do the same. I love the city, but have no urge to start or raise a family in the city.
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u/ausernameidk_ Feb 27 '26
Suburbia is still heavily idealized and sought after. Most of the new houses being built are McMansions. There's been a lot of development in the cities, but a majority of the population still lives in the suburbs. Although the cities are more sought after than they used to be, most young people don't live there. If you live in a city full of young people, it's easy to think that's the lifestyle that everyone is living, but the truth is for every 1 person who moves into the city, 2 stay behind in the suburbs. We still have a long way to go, but we're definitely on the right track. I hope things improve as time goes on.
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u/itemluminouswadison Feb 27 '26
I think it broadened peoples horizons and we're realizing living car dependent driving from big box to big box isnt a wonderful way of life
Just, before, we weren't as connected and exposed to other ways of life
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u/Bro_Pesci Feb 27 '26
You’re wrong. A-lot of people still want this. Im in suburbs of Boston and take care of my yard it’s a pride thing. But ill take this over the city and day and yes i still go on my phone lol. Plus we have attain that goes right to north station.
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u/Dynablade_Savior Feb 27 '26
I grew up in a suburban area with social media constantly around me. If suburban status is dead, then it's means to celebrate
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u/ButterscotchSad4514 Suburbanite Feb 27 '26
No. Suburban home prices, relative to urban home prices, are higher than ever. The status of the suburbs is arguably higher than it’s been in many decades.
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u/Entire-Garage-1902 Feb 27 '26
At your age you should know better than to do anything “for appearances “. Be an authentic person, you might find you like it. Regarding suburbs, they’re a great place for families with kids. Good schools. Friends nearby, family centered activities, yards to play in. Live where you want and for God’s sake cool it with the trolling on social media. That’s where intellect and individuality go to die.
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u/External_Koala971 Feb 27 '26
I think because a house like this is so far out of reach for so many people, they like to sh*t on it. But the majority of Americans want a big house on acreage more than they want an urban shoebox.
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u/Hoonsoot Suburbanite Feb 27 '26
I don't think social media killed or much changed suburban status, as you describe it. I am not sure how much it ever really existed. Those I know never thought a big house meant you "won" in life. Its ultimately just a place to live. If someone is happy in a big house, great, but you don't need that to be a success. Not in suburbia and not elsewhere. Its at most an appearance thing. The folks in the smallest house on the block may very well have a much fatter 401k and far more in investments than those in the larger houses. I think the majority of people have always known that.
The perfect yard is not something I strive for but either the labor or the appearance makes some people happy. I'd rather spend my time elsewhere but getting out in the yard and maintaining it is a lot healthier than laying on the couch and watching influencers. So if some people enjoy it, more power to them.
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u/xmodemlol Feb 27 '26
Of course people still show off by having a big house, nice car, possessions, etc.
Many people use social media too much, but they still have lives, meet other people, go out, etc.
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u/TheBloodyNinety Feb 27 '26
I’d disagree most millennials lay on their couch dreaming of being the next social media star. That seems like an environment thing.
As far as the McMansion, I’d prefer more isolated. At a certain house size it stops really mattering. I’d prefer either having somewhere I can get away and check out. Which would be kind’ve the opposite of the OP.
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u/Sanpaku Feb 27 '26
Suburban sprawl made social life difficult as an adult. When I buy my forever home, it will be within 3 blocks walking distance from grocery store, coffee shop, and dive bar.
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u/NoSleepTilBrklynn Feb 27 '26
Not all suburbs are built the same. I rent a house in Bethesda, Maryland and it’s a wild ride. People most definitely aspire to live here. Lots of people. Perfectly fine but unspectacular 1950s houses are sold for $1million and are then torn down and mansions are then built in their place that then sell for $2 million+.
https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/8208-Maple-Ridge-Rd-Bethesda-MD-20814/37171360_zpid/
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u/ecolantonio Feb 27 '26
I’m not sure if I agree that there’s literally no status in maintaining a lawn in the suburbs. At least where I live, some people maintain their lawn for pride and prestige and others maintain it out of a sense of conformity, some people maintain a lawn because they like it, some people think it’s something meaningful for their kids, etc.
I don’t know if I’d say suburban status is dead. Huge swaths of the population still aspire to live a suburban life.
Social media helped but the forces that lead to the decline in suburban perception have been around for decades. Criticism of suburban consumerism, car culture, alienation, conformity, etc have been around nearly as long as the suburbs have. In my suburban high school 15 years ago people understood this through books like Revolutionary Road, songs like Little Boxes, etc.
A much bigger factor was the 2008 recession and its aftermath when thousands of young people flocked to cities for affordability and vibrancy while neighborhoods in the exurbs became littered with foreclosures and vacancy. Record numbers of Americans studied or traveled abroad too, seeing how stupid the American way of life really is. You can add social media to one of many other smaller factors but I wouldn’t put it near the top
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u/WillDupage Feb 27 '26
I think your premise is “online only”.
There are plenty of people whose status leans heavily on where they live.
For example, here in Chicagoland the joke goes around: Q: How do you know someone lives in Naperville? A: Don’t worry, they’ll tell you.
I’m fairly confident this applies to whichever Desperately Striving to be Upscale Suburb exists in most American metropolitan areas. (You know, the ones where real estate listings are slathered with words like ‘upscale’, ‘exclusive’, ‘desirable’ etc, particularly when 15 years ago it was just ‘Johnson’s cow pasture’.)
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u/direavenger1963 Feb 27 '26
No, the suburbs are still popular. People move to my hood for the schools, low crime, and the people.
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u/Maleficent-Crew-5424 Feb 27 '26
No, you're on a subreddit for people who hate suburbs so you don't see people who like them.
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u/DeepHerting Feb 27 '26
Sort of? The upper middle class used to be the most realistically aspirational. You'd see MTV Cribs or whatever, but the richest realistic person most people knew about had a McMansion, an Escalade and a country club membership. Now the actual rich are just spamming shit about Bugattis and Dubai all over social media and no one cares about your riding mower and basement bar anymore.
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u/Feral_doves Feb 27 '26
Have you considered evaluating what you personally value? If a big house with a lawn isn’t what you want, why chase that? ”Status” doesn’t mean shit if you’re miserable. Doesn’t really mean shit anyway in most circumstances. Do what makes ya happy.
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u/AStoutBreakfast Feb 27 '26
As someone that works in the urban planning realm I can assure you there are still a large number of people that unfortunately desire something like this. I think there’s been some pushback away from McMansions primarily due to cost but so many people will talk about having a home with some land and don’t want to be “living on top of your neighbors”.
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u/Swimming_Nose4713 Feb 27 '26
For me, and I honestly didn't think about it before I moved here, the name of the town I live in gives me 'status'. As in, people pause for a second, look me up and down, and say something to the effect of "Yeah I've heard of it." or "Nice town!".
(It doesn't matter that I have an 1800 square foot 1940s split level in that town...)
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u/KevinDean4599 Feb 27 '26
One of the biggest drivers to live in the suburbs is when couples have kids and want to live in a good school district. they also want space and a yard for the kids and pets. That won't change because of social media. In so many urban areas there are just a handful of schools with high scores and the alternative is private school which is really expensive.
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u/Quitcha_Bitchin Feb 27 '26
Lost it's status with the death of what used to be called the middle class. Basically the McMansion killed it. Just like it killed the subdivisions that came before it.
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u/SwoleBezos Feb 27 '26
The trend back towards urbanization was already starting in the 90s. These suburbs were a Boomer trend and the people that grew up there started to see the problems and cities began to revitalize and grow again.
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u/Swimming-Watch9609 Feb 27 '26
This is what kept score for a kid in the 90s who lived in the suburbs. There were lots of people living very different lives in cities who felt their way of life was the better way
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u/anselben Feb 27 '26
lol this looks almost exactly like my parents house. Although my folks have gardened and landscaped the entire yard much better than this
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u/Signal-Spirit1731 Feb 27 '26
I was just thinking about this the other day, before social media your status/ influence was just you and what people thought of you. People judge you on your clothes, your house, your job, your car etc. They can't really judge you on your experiences on the surface, they need to get to know you.
Nowadays, our status and influence is tied in with social media. We actually can seem higher status by posting pics and videos of our experiences; going to parties, working out, traveling, concerts, hookups, etc etc People are judging you in a very different way than before the internet, we care more about experiences than material things, also doesnt help that many things are becoming unaffordable
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u/chapelchill Feb 27 '26
Not sure I’m following your logic here. I feel like you’re confusing social status with whatever trend is deemed “cool.” Owning a nice house in the suburbs has never really been cool, but if it’s a nice enough house in a nice enough suburb, then it is very much a status symbol.
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u/DeHarigeTuinkabouter Feb 27 '26
With this reasoning status is no longer a thing and only social media stars have it. Obviously not true in real life
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u/PrimaryHighlight5617 Feb 27 '26
I disagree. Elder gen z and owning a home is MAJOR status. we own a home in a nice suburb and we are very proud of it.
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u/PersonalBrowser Feb 27 '26
I totally disagree.
Yeah, there’s no overt “suburbs are cool” vibes on social media in the same way that influencers show off cultural life in major cities.
But there is still a TON of content that implicitly feeds into suburban lifestyles. Basically any family / parenting / middle age / kids-oriented influencer typically has a huge suburban home filled with tons of the cool and latest trendy products, etc.
Suburbs are as popular as ever lol
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u/Harleychloe Feb 27 '26
I grew up in a home identical to this in the early 2000s and I distinctly remember it selling for $300k (back when houses had for sale signs out front) I looked back on it recently and now it’s going for $1.2M. Nothing has changed, no remodeling. And wages have certainly not quadrupled — so essentially boomers have snatched up housing and taken the ladder with them. It’s incredibly frustrating.
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u/ineedthenitro Feb 27 '26
Meh, I think it’s ok if you have kids because they keep you busy and you’re just exhausted from life and the commute lol. but living somewhere walkable with kids would be cool. even just getting a kid into a car seat is hell to go anywhere. So much easier to put them in a stroller or just walk out the door if you can walk somewhere. Idk, a lot of people still want this but can’t afford it.
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u/myname_1s_mud Feb 27 '26
First of all, thats not a middle class house. I mean, middle class is hard to define as the metrics we use are contradictory, but I would consider that upper middle to wealthy. Thats like a surgeon or lawyers house right there.
Second, no, social media did not kill the middle class. The vast majority of people dont care about influencers, and arent following them or trying to match their lifestyle. There definitely still is a middle class (again, its hard to define what that is, and you could argue there's never been a middle class. Its really more of an invention of politicians for pandering) but alot of that middle class looks different. Now, I know alot of people who are what id call traditional middle class. Theyre working class people who own a home in the suburbs, have a boat and some motor toys.
Im closer to the new middle class. I own a home, but I have to work all the time to pay for it so I dont have time for a boat that I cant afford anyways.
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u/Good-Ear-6981 Feb 27 '26
Yeah dude, single family housing in America is at an all time high in both scarcity and cost because nobody gives a damn about it anymore.
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u/rosemaryscrazy Feb 27 '26
Well houses use to be filled with life. That’s the difference.
You walk into a house like this in the 90s and they probably had actual lived in furniture. The house was usually functional and full of knickknacks.
2010 you walk into a house like this and you aren’t sure what you are going to get.
Maybe one grey sectional and a video game console? 🤨
Because who needs furniture when everything in your house is just a phone scrolling station.
🤣 Eventually houses will just be a giant black screen.
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u/romansamurai Feb 27 '26
The place we live in now is a small town that expanded out with small subdivisions . We are in one of the them and love it. No through traffic. Quiet. Beautiful. Parks near by and all the shopping I want is 10 min away down a busy road but in such a way that none of that traffic has any real reason to go our direction (it’s all farmland in that direction past us). If I didn’t have kids I probably wouldn’t care as much. But with kids I like the relative peace and quiet and safety.
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u/NeverFlyFrontier Feb 27 '26
Yet people still flock to the burbs. Internet doesn’t decide real life.
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Feb 28 '26
Are you talking about the house or the grass? Suburbs are not out of fashion, still the best place to be near a city and own a yard. The grass? If you are doing your grass for appearances you already lost. I work on my grass because I think its a fun challenge.
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u/Only_Two2982 Feb 28 '26
This whole post is aggrivating to me. If this is rage bait, you won. FOR STARTERS in what world is it ok to classify your community members into the winners and the losers. The rich stay rich, the poor stay poor; theyre all my countrymen. Second, who the fuck really keeps up appearances for others. You do that to make yourself feel better about yourself. Its done for the self. If you dont want to. DONT. And third why are we blaming society scale changes on individual aspects of our society. Yes social media may make people lazy, but the bigger problem IS THAT NOBODY HAS ANY GOD D*MN MONEY. You cant manicure your lawn if u cant afford car insurance.
Tldr: quite saying the system is falling apart because of unfocused young people who have no control over anything
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u/Odd-Shoulder8286 Feb 28 '26
One of the primary sins of the McMansion is being too familiar. Aside from that, their construction tends to be pretty cheap/no frills.
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u/palmettoB Feb 28 '26
Nothing better than a wife, kids, and a big house in the burbs. People who don’t have the looks, brains, and work ethic it takes to secure the American dream just pretend like they never wanted it in the first place.
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Feb 28 '26
NO IT WAS THE US GOVERNMENT WORKING I TANDEM WITH OTHER WORLD LEADERS AND CORPORATIONS TO RAPE AND ELIMINATE THE MIDDLE CLASS
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u/SavannahInChicago Feb 28 '26
There is still status. Just because you are in circles that does not like suburbs does not mean everyone is. In Chicago the suburbs are still growing.
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u/thetonytaylor Feb 28 '26
I definitely don’t want some McMansion, even as a kid they seemed awful. If I win at life I’m building a ranch in 2-3 cities that I want to spend time in throughout the year.
Also, the idea of being addicted to social media and influencers sounds awful. People need to touch grass (I mean this in the most literal sense) and just learn to enjoy being outside and doing things again.
I ended up building a house on a lake and I can’t wait to spend time fishing and hiking when it gets warmer. We had one of the coldest winters in a decade and I wish I would have been al settled in so I could try my hands at ice fishing.
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u/BadPlus Feb 28 '26
This js literally the dumbest question I’ve ever heard. Do you guys still like my white picket fence? Lol
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u/cult_of_image Feb 28 '26
American standards for rich has just aligned with third world percepts because most of America has become poor.
It isn't realistic, because most of these people have fallen out, it's better to just go to fantastical thinking of rich that only 1% have access to. It's the same deal with the poor kids in America that have fantasies about being professional athletes. It's a wonderful disconnect from reality for them.
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u/lyricjax Feb 28 '26
Suburban living is the death of true culture. And they can't keep it cheap enough anyways so you gotta save money by not having a car, walking to work, public transportation.
If you arnt born into money or finance literacy, then youre negative at the start so. Id blame the creators of social media but not rhe platforms itself.
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u/Gloomy-Inflation-403 Feb 28 '26
How did it kill suburban status if houses have never been more scarce and impossible to buy
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u/Raalf Mar 01 '26
HOAs killed suburbia for my generation (late X early millenial). I'd rather live in a trailer in rural Alabama in between two racially opposing families than an HOA ever again.
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u/ArtVandelay009 Mar 01 '26
I think the status thing around Boston is either a) living in the fancy part of the city like Beacon Hill, and your kids go to Milton Academy / whatever. Or b) living in one of the dense "minicities" around Boston (Newton, Brookline, Wellesley, Needham, etc) and having a place on a cape island, or maybe Manchester-by-the-Sea, Rockport, Newburyport, etc. Thing is, what I'm calling minicities are basically walkable and self-contained, but so close to everything else that you can have it all. So, not really suburbs the way Johns Creek is to Atlanta as an example.
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u/ProtanopicMidget Mar 02 '26
Grew up in the suburbs. It’s not social media’s fault I couldn’t get anywhere or do anything without asking my parents for a ride.
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u/NutzNBoltz369 Mar 02 '26
Social media sort of revealed suburbia for what it is:
Superficial. Inefficient. Isolating. Mainly about the celebration of having the money for it to be all that and still be a status symbol.
You can also lay on the couch and watch influencers from an apartment in town and take the bus or walk to work. Ultimately, your home is where you take some meals and sleep. Have sex, partake in consumption of entertainment etc. Even raise a family. The family part is where the 'Burbs do redeem themselves sort of. All that money to waste is going to bring in more tax revenue and fund better schools. Plus, more room, even if the car based nature of the 'burbs make them a prison for kids (outside of online experiences) until they can drive.
Much of suburbia is flex. The lawn is flex. Having some $100k car is flex. McMansions are flex. No practical substance but yah...flex. Look at me I have enough money to waste it on fluff. For a dopamine kick or whatever.
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u/metsjets86 Mar 02 '26
You sound like the people you are complaining about. Obsessed with social media stars.
People look at social media stars like tv stars. No one is judging you because you are not a tv/social media star.
Weird shit.
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u/bhenghisfudge Mar 02 '26
Because that's a dogshit mc mansion that is probably already falling apart and no one is impressed by that sort of tacky flex anymore?
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u/barefootguy83 Feb 27 '26
I grew up in the suburbs and as an adult I want nothing more than to live in a town near nature with walking distance to restaurants and cafes.