r/chicago • u/SoftServeMonk • 1d ago

Picture I just saw a squirrel eating a chicken wing

Post image

Outside a CPS office. Friday win!

469 Upvotes

99% Upvoted

47 comments sorted by

63

u/16th_Century_Prophet Lake View East 1d ago

And his hair was perfect

9

u/beeksie 1d ago

"Squirrels of Chicago" doesn't quite have the same ring as "Werewolves of London"

6

u/TheSleepingNinja Gage Park 10h ago

I saw a squirrel with a chicken wing in his hand

Walking through the streets of Boystown in the rain

He was looking for the place called Bird's Nest Wings

Gonna get a big pile of chicken waings

Ah-hoo, squirrels of Chicago

Ah-hoo

Ah-hoo, squirrels of Chicago

Ah-hoo

You hear him scufflin' around your kitchen door

You better not let him in

Little old lady got mutilated late last night

Squirrels of Chicago again

Ah-hoo, squirrels of Chicago

Ah-hoo

Ah-hoo, squirrels of Chicago

Ah-hoo

He's the fluffy-tailed snark who ran amok in Wicker Park

Lately he's been overheard in Mayfair

You better stay away from him, he'll rip your nuts off, Jim

Huh, I'd like to meet his neighbor

Ah-hoo, squirrels of Chicago

Ah-hoo

Ah-hoo, squirrels of Chicago

Ah-hoo

Well, I saw Svengoolie walkin' with the Party Aunt

Doin' the squirrels of Chicago

I saw Son of Svengoolie walkin' with the Party Aunt, uh

Doin' the squirrels of Chicago   I saw a squirrel drinkin' a Manhattan at Longman & Eagle

And his hair was perfect

Ah-hoo, squirrels of Chicago   Huh, draw blood

Ah-hoo, squirrels of Chicago

1

u/HRHSuzz 1d ago

OMG - I'm not alone! It's the first thing that popped in my head.

55

u/ipalvr 1d ago

Here’s one eating pizza

54

u/tooshortpants 1d ago

Saw this legend in Hyde Park a couple of years ago

41

u/lolamongolia 1d ago

Saw this garlic bread squirrel in Uptown a few years ago.

12

u/NYCtoCHI 23h ago

r/AbsoluteUnits candidate right there! 😳

8

u/FieldsofBlue 1d ago

Mama mia

19

u/Liquid_G Suburb of Chicago 1d ago

Did you offer him some hot sauce at least?

16

u/Okeydokey2u 1d ago

One i was walking my dog and he suddenly stuck his head in a bush and when I finally pulled him out he had a full slice of pizza in his mouth and it was in the right way, with like the crust part hanging out

16

u/PhileasFoggsTrvlAgt Andersonville 1d ago

The ones in Welles Park treat strollers like a buffet line. Cheerios, Cheetos, granola bars, yogurt pouches, fruit snacks, if it's good enough for a toddler then it's good enough for them.

2

u/headcoatee City 1d ago

Yup, and I guess it's been going on since there were strollers and snacks, because I had this happen over 20 years ago at Wilson Park and a few others.

13

u/amyo_b Berwyn 1d ago

They recently were doing an experiment with a donated body and discovered that deer will nibble on bones of the deceased. Essentially getting the minerals they need to survive that way (cows usually use a mineral lick for the same purpose). https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/deer-caught-gnawing-human-bones-first-time-180963178/

other herbivores have been seen eating other critters too. Basically when protein presents itself with no risk a lot of critters will take the opportunity.

6

u/Fallingpeople 1d ago

The real reason dogs chase squirrels.

5

u/bornslyasafox 1d ago

Squirrel wit da chicken wang.

5

u/Quailfreezy 1d ago

It's not even jewel chicken Monday

4

u/BoobAbides 1d ago

I read this in a Mojo Nixon voice

6

u/Icy-Yellow3514 1d ago

I once caught a photo of a bird carrying a gummy worm in Lincoln Square.

4

u/khalilkaaniche 11h ago

the cps office part explains it. that squirrel has a lunch reimbursement stuck in the system since august

1

u/SoftServeMonk 11h ago

Oh my god YES. Been waiting for travel pay for 2 months! I should just ride on this guy’s back to all my schools; there’d be a lot of pit stops to snack but it least it’d be free. Actually it would be like a bonus because imagine all the chicken wings we’ll have.

1

u/khalilkaaniche 8h ago

a squirrel ride share with wing stops beats waiting on cps travel pay, and he's probably more reliable

7

u/GBeastETH Former Chicagoan 1d ago

This is why it’s not safe to take a nap in a public park. Big Squirrel is ruthless. 🐿️

3

u/weRallAddicts 1d ago

And now you have truly seen everything.

3

u/bobbib14 1d ago

Get him on hot ones!

3

u/DildoTheSizeOfUranus 23h ago

Have you seen the prices on chicken wings lately? Gotta jump on that shit when you can. The squirrel gets it.

4

u/Fragrant-Oil3874 1d ago

That squirrel for the streets 

7

u/fudgie-tacomen 1d ago

Love it. This is what the internet was invented for. Thank you, and have the wonderful weekend you so richly deserve.

2

u/SoftServeMonk 11h ago

🫶🐿️

3

u/SeaDragonTattoo 1d ago

I saw one, years ago, jump out of a kitchen window with a whole-ass pork chop and book across the street with it

2

u/hamsandwich666_ 1d ago

i saw a squirrel with an entire slice of pizza once

2

u/enderpanda Former Chicagoan 1d ago

Hopefully it was Harold's.

2

u/blvckhoney Rogers Park 1d ago

Shark's better

2

u/enderpanda Former Chicagoan 23h ago

I haven't lived in Chicago in about 10 years (miss it so much) so Harold's will probably always be my favorite, forever. I do visit as much as I can, I'll do my best to check them out. :)

2

u/ChicagoThrowaway422 1d ago

I thought people were trying to kill dogs until I read that all the chicken bones left laying around are from rats taking them from garbage cans.

A squirrel is new to me, though.

2

u/typ901 1d ago

I love this so much I almost sent it to my ex.

2

u/B00marangTrotter 4h ago

They got Jack!!

4

u/mmmcheesybread 1d ago

I once saw one licking the fuck out of a McDonald’s cheeseburger wrapper. Buddy was in a trance.

2

u/Upbeat-Refuse9615 1d ago

He's got nothing on Pizza Rat.

1

u/FridayHalfDays 8h ago

Ain’t no thing like a chicken wing!!