Thoughts on cyberpunk comic first chapter

[u/Outside_Tomato_653]

I am wondering what people thoughts are on the story and dialogue of the first chapter of my cyberpunk style comic. I’m not worried about the artwork because I know it’s bad but would like to see opinions on the story and if it would be enough to draw in the reader for more.

[u/KabulaTheBoardgame]

No, I think that was clear, probably bad wording on my side :)
It does make sense that someone feeling that way would be negative about the place where he lives, I just wasn't sure how much of the world building you wanted to blend in as a cause.
I'd still be careful on where you want the story to go, starting with a character with no goal/desire/wish or at least core principle, puts you in a weird spot in my opinion.

[u/Outside_Tomato_653 → u/KabulaTheBoardgame]

Idk if you’ve read both but I plan on turning it into a monster mixed with akira so he will pretty much get a goal very soon.

[u/KabulaTheBoardgame → u/Outside_Tomato_653]

very familiar with monster and watched the akira anime ages ago...let's assume he saves the girl, she becomes a mega monster and he makes his mission to put her out :)
Why would he? When things turn bad he'd rather be over with it...
If she becomes his reason to live now, that's a double reason to want out when she is problematic. For what we have read, he never seemed to care for the rest of the world, so why would he become a savior now?

The story of Monster works because Tenma has a super strong belief that human life is the most important thing, and this factors in the dilemma "is it right to kill to save others/is it right to save someone who may kill?"

Maybe you have all of those things sorted out, take it as food for thoughts if not!

[u/Outside_Tomato_653 → u/KabulaTheBoardgame]

Oh the girl isn’t the monster, it’s not really the same story of monster like that but it’s gonna have elements of it is what I’m saying