So? They also dont know if they will be friends if they separate. I feel like individualism has such a strong hold in the west that separation became a widespread norm and people are deeming a kid watching their mother marry another man "such an awesome experience" because their father is ok with it. "My dad is giving my mom away to another man. Such an awesome experience!". It think's more like "best of a bad situation" for the kid.
Now people from the west will rain down their downvotes.
Edit: People , I live in the west too. I am a very individualist person too. My "people from the west" may have sounded too generalizing and triggering. I apologize. I just dont like how individualism is endlessly defended. Again, my opinion. I'm sharing an issue that affects me as well. And I'm not saying every couple who seperated should have stayed together.
I shared my thoughts. I'm not exempt from it. I might be wrong. Feel free to disagree. You dont have to keep replying with your personal experiences to justify why there was a split needed or not needed. You can also stop with the "Everyone cant stay together!!" strawman responses. I didnt say you or your parents specifically should have stayed together. I'm talking about a societal pattern. To each their own.
Well, if you have less individualistic ideals, you would be okay with sacrificing some parts of yourself to keep your family together, and still be happy with that. The fact that some cant fathom being happy in that case, is BECAUSE they are too individualistic. And I'm not saying sacrifice everything and keep nothing of yourself. I'm just saying the tolerance for sacrifice is much much lower because of individualism. Not a new concept, people.
I'm talking about this on a socetal level. Hell, I'm not even saying that I have a perfect level of individualism. I dont. But I can accept the reality of the larger societal pattern. And I might be wrong. But this is just my take at the moment.
Well maybe the pattern is the result of people having unrealistic expectations.. being raised by people who lie to them and don't give them a true understanding of what it is to be happy and what it is actually important in life. My parents divorced. My mum always tried to keep me in contact with my dad. In the end he died alone, because he was an asshole, and I'm raising my children with attention and love because I know what not to do from him. My wife and I get along great. We love each other. Sure we fight, and have issues communicating. But we didn't go in to this blind, we wouldn't have had kids if we didn't know we would are right for each other long term. We met in our mid/late 20s, already had a handful of shit relationships, knew what we didn't want and were very fortunate to run into each other. But if I didn't meet her I wouldn't have had kids
-33
u/dynamic_gecko 5d ago edited 5d ago
So? They also dont know if they will be friends if they separate. I feel like individualism has such a strong hold in the west that separation became a widespread norm and people are deeming a kid watching their mother marry another man "such an awesome experience" because their father is ok with it. "My dad is giving my mom away to another man. Such an awesome experience!". It think's more like "best of a bad situation" for the kid.
Now people from the west will rain down their downvotes.
Edit: People , I live in the west too. I am a very individualist person too. My "people from the west" may have sounded too generalizing and triggering. I apologize. I just dont like how individualism is endlessly defended. Again, my opinion. I'm sharing an issue that affects me as well. And I'm not saying every couple who seperated should have stayed together.
I shared my thoughts. I'm not exempt from it. I might be wrong. Feel free to disagree. You dont have to keep replying with your personal experiences to justify why there was a split needed or not needed. You can also stop with the "Everyone cant stay together!!" strawman responses. I didnt say you or your parents specifically should have stayed together. I'm talking about a societal pattern. To each their own.