r/oneliners • u/Gusto88 • 2h ago
Half way through eating a horse, just realised I'm not as hungry as I thought.
17
Upvotes
r/oneliners • u/jdignon • 42m ago
Say what you want about Eve and Adam, those two wanted to fuck each other.
•
Upvotes
r/oneliners • u/daaave33 • 1d ago
I wonder if gun manuals have a trouble shooting section?
194
Upvotes
r/oneliners • u/Gussy_writes • 15h ago
I was eating vegetable soup last night, tasted real good until I bit into another wheelchair.
2
Upvotes
r/oneliners • u/LiteratureSure3738 • 1d ago
I quit being a firefighter due to constant burnout
23
Upvotes
r/oneliners • u/Internal_Drawing_460 • 1d ago
Joking about muslim fundamentalists can blow up in your face
32
Upvotes
r/oneliners • u/huevosyhuevos • 2d ago
This field of carrots marks the worst snowman mass casualty event in history
19
Upvotes
r/oneliners • u/No-Cardiologist7640 • 3d ago
Learning Braille is so easy you can do it with your eyes closed
47
Upvotes
r/oneliners • u/breck • 3d ago
Doc said he would be right back and told me to get undressed but never said stay in exam room.
0
Upvotes
r/oneliners • u/CFCYYZ • 4d ago
I joined the Procrastinator's Club in university, but the meetings were always postponed.
27
Upvotes
r/oneliners • u/sulldanivan • 4d ago
After biting a flight attendant Selma Blair had the nerve to complain about the in-flight snacks.
17
Upvotes
r/oneliners • u/Timberfist • 4d ago
TIL that Area 51, the top secret United States Air Force base in the Nevada Desert is so called because it measures exactly three meters by seventeen.
0
Upvotes
r/oneliners • u/SlitchBap • 6d ago
It's ironic that pregnant women can only have virgin drinks
64
Upvotes
r/oneliners • u/ShaggyB • 7d ago
A hurricane and a himmicane got together and made a smaller storm and then developed post partum tropical depression
22
Upvotes
r/oneliners • u/CrazyKZG • 8d ago
My penis may not be 12 inches long, but it smells like a foot.
60
Upvotes
r/oneliners • u/Gusto88 • 9d ago
Pessimists see a bathroom stall without a door while optimists see a shit show ready to happen.
8
Upvotes