please keep in mind I am not saying this applies to everyone who has been falsely accused.

But I seriously think that many instances of men who 'get falsely accused', sexually assaulted a woman in a non-violent way. Most men I talked to only really defined sexual assault as exerting incredible physical violence to perform it, whereas not mentioning stuff like coercion, repeatedly asking, guilt tripping, manipulation and taking advantage of someones inability to consent is not brought up

When I was 21, a guy I was dating told me I was "so low maintenance" and I remember being genuinely proud of it.
He meant it as a compliment and I definitely took it as one. I didn't care where we ate. I never asked him to pick me up even when getting home meant a 40 minute train ride. If he changed plans last minute I'd usually just say it was fine, even when it wasn't.
I basically thought being an easy girlfriend meant being a good girlfriend.
And nobody ever told me to act like that ever. I just somehow picked up the idea that needing things made you difficult.
I watched women get called demanding for wanting their boyfriend to plan something occasionally, clingy for asking why someone disappeared for two days, dramatic for saying a joke bothered them. Meanwhile I was sitting there feeling weirdly superior because "I don't care about that stuff."
Except I did care about some of it. I just got really good at pretending I didn't.
There was one birthday where my boyfriend at the time forgot we had plans and went out with his friends. He apologized and asked if I was mad. I said nope, told him to have fun, then spent the night pissed off at home because I didn't want to be "that girlfriend."
What exactly did I win there?
I'm 32 now and I notice how often women still describe themselves this way like it's a personality achievement. "I don't need gifts." "I never ask where he's going." "I'm happy with anything." Sometimes that's genuinely who someone is, obviously. But sometimes it sounds exactly like I used to sound, where the real flex was how little inconvenience I could cause another person.
I dont think having preferences makes someone high maintenance. Neither does wanting effort back.
I still hate making a fuss over small stuff and im probably never going to become someone who needs a huge romantic production. But I wish I'd figured out earlier that being easy to date and being afraid to ask for anything can look almost identical from the outside

I’m tired of the influencer economy consuming everything, and the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show is a perfect example.

And before anyone says “Victoria’s Secret has always been a corporation trying to sell you underwear” yes, obviously. The old show was commercial, but it understood that what it was actually selling was fantasy.

The models became celebrities because they were Victoria’s Secret models. Getting your wings meant something. Becoming an Angel meant something. The Fantasy Bra was basically the highest honor within that world.

Now the equation feels reversed. Instead of Victoria’s Secret creating icons, they bring in people who already have massive audiences. Nothing illustrates that better than bringing back the Fantasy Bra after years, making it the most expensive one ever, and putting it on Kylie Jenner.

This isn’t Kylie hate. She’s obviously incredibly successful. But she had no history with Victoria’s Secret. She’s not a runway model. She wasn’t an Angel, we didn’t watch her work her way through the show, and there was no buildup to her earning that moment.

And yes, I understand exactly why they chose her. That’s my issue. The Kardashian/Jenner family are basically the original influencer family. Kylie comes with hundreds of millions of followers and guaranteed attention. It makes perfect sense from a marketing perspective, and that’s precisely why it feels so hollow.

Give it to Adriana as a legacy moment. Or give it to a current model like Anok Yai and make her the next Victoria’s Secret star. I’m just tired of everything needing an influencer attached to it. Brands used to build their own worlds and create their own icons. Now they borrow someone else’s audience.

The old VS show was ridiculous, over the top and unattainable. Giant wings and multimillion dollar diamond bras served absolutely no practical purpose. That was the point.

I don’t need everything to be relatable or optimized for engagement. I want fashion to introduce me to people I don’t already know. The old show made being a Victoria’s Secret model feel culturally significant. Now it feels like you need to already be culturally significant.

And that’s exactly why the magic is gone.

Wasn’t this brand deeply entangled with the Epstein files? Also why do we have to see starvation runway shows AGAIN?! Like it’s depressing and triggering for young girls and older women for the most part. Celebrities are losing their sparkle in my opinion. Like you have money, now go away and stop rubbing all the surgeries you had in our faces 😞

What do you think is the biggest reason why up until now, transgender women are still facing discrimination, especially concerning the statement "trans women are women" ?

Rant I made a post a few hours ago, and a bunch of weird men commented on it, saying I looked pretty and stuff. Then I went to check their profiles and found so much bizarre stuff. I felt disgusted, ugh. Why are there so many creepy men like this?

I hate how I'm weaker than most men, I just cant accept it. And I know that's not all there is and that there are things women are inherently better at than men, but in a world where being stronger, bigger is often preferred what's the point? I hate how we have sore boobs all the fucking time, how we have more body fat percentage, how we are shorter, how we are taught to just like cute pink things, to never speak up, to be clean, and be all smiley. I also hate how "feminine" we are, how we (we as in like the internet ig) only like things that are pretty, cute, soft, glamourous but when it comes to liking a man the bar is absolutely in hell. I don't know, I just want to cry all the time, I don't want be in this body. Am I just a stupid misogynist? because why do I hate everything that's related to being a woman. I dont understand. I had a fight with my family few months back where I was telling them about how playing with dollls, liking pink, etc was all learned, but they insisted that it was all just "biological" and it was due to our brain. LIKE I HATE THAT. AM I GOING CRAAZY I DONT UNDERSTAND????? And doont even get me started on make up, being skinny, and all that.

We were at my parents' house last weekend for a birthday dinner and my niece was sitting on the floor looking through one of those old photo albums my mom still keeps in the cabinet.
She started asking who everyone was, mostly because half the pictures are from before she was born. At one point she flipped through a few pages and asked, "Why is grandma never in these?"
My mom laughed and said, "Because I was taking the pictures."
Then my niece pointed at another one and asked where my aunt was.
Same answer.
Then she found photos from a vacation my sister took with her kids a few years ago and asked where my sister was. Again. Taking the picture.
She looked genuinely confused and said something like, "So the moms just don't get pictures?"
Everyone laughed, but after that I couldn't stop noticing it.
We pulled out a couple more albums and it was ridiculous once you were actually looking for it. Christmas mornings, birthdays, beach trips, graduations, random Sunday lunches. The men are sitting with the kids, opening presents, holding babies, standing in front of landmarks.
The women are there too, obviously. You can tell because someone packed everything, decorated the table, dressed the kids and documented the entire day.
They're just barely in the evidence.
My mom is 61 and I tried to find a nice candid photo of her from when I was little where she wasn't posing because somebody specifically called her over. There really aren't many.
My sister went through her phone and realized she has hundreds of pictures of her husband doing normal dad stuff with their kids. Reading to them, sleeping on the couch with them, making pancakes, carrying them around.
He has photos of her too, but almost all of them are ones she asked him to take.
That distinction kind of got me.
I started wondering how common this actually is, how many women can look through years of family photos and realize they were present for almost everything but somehow barely appear in the record of it.
Nobody in my family was deliberately excluding women from pictures. Nobody was telling moms to stay behind the camera. It just seems like documenting everyone else's life quietly became another thing they were responsible for.
My niece spent the rest of dinner stealing people's phones and taking extremely bad pictures of all the women.
Half of them are blurry and one has my aunt chewing bread with her eyes closed.
But there's something I really like about them now. They're not good pictures at all, they're just proof that the women were actually sitting at the table too

Good afternoon girlies, I would like to know if panty liners are really that good when you have a lot of discharge everyday. Do you get itchy while wearing them or they are pretty comfortable? Do they absorb the discharge very well?

I seriously can't think of one time where 'hormones' have lead me to make an impulsive decision, good or bad. Maybe it varies woman to woman... but also in my workplace,- i've never heard of a mistake being made due to a woman going through a phase in her menstrual cycle. I've never taken a day off of work due to period cramps or known a woman who has personally(though that would be great, because it hurts like hell).

This whole online "Women couldn't be president b-because they'd start a war if they had a cramp" bullshit is just not likely in any dimension or reality. I think if anything, everything we go through hormonally and physically makes us more capable, resilient and tolerant.

I hate being a girl. It sucks.

I hate my uterus, i hate periods, they are just painful, not like i want kids anyways, even if i want to take off my uterus or ovaries, it is not available everywhere, and the side effects look scary, and the fact that i need a surgery to have a body that does not cause me pain is enough to piss me off.

I hate the fact that i have to do all the work of pregnancy and child birth, i dont want kids, but what if a woman does? She has to tolerate the suffering for 9 months, then hours for childbirth, then taking care of the baby, which is mostly on her not the father.

I hate the fact i will be in risk of getting pregnant even with contraceptives.

I hate that i can't wear whatever i want cuz some trash men will stare in a disgusting way, if they didn't do more.

I hate that i can't go outside alone at night.

It may seem stupid for men, but for me as a girl, i can't enjoy a small night walk alone.

I hate having boobs or butt, they are not only useless, but also annoying, an extra weight that prevents me from moving freely.

I hate the expectations put on women. They expect me to have children even tho they all know how hell it is. They expect me to shave my legs and look soft like a doll while men can be natural. They expect me to love dresses and makeup and i hella don't. Once in a wedding, my aunt said i look like a boy cuz i was wearing a tshirt and pants and a cap.

I hate that men will always be stronger than me no matter what i do, and i hate more that people say "they are stronger to protect women and do hard labor", if women were strong they won't need men to protect them,+ men are what we need to protected from -usually-. hard labor, women also do hard labor since they were created.

I hate this damn useless body it only brings me pain and discomfort.

I hate how people try to justify this unfairness.

"Men have responsibility, women have pain"

Wtf? How can you even compare?

Women also have responsibilities, and responsibility is better (not necessarily easier) than pain

Pain has no "cause" (more like excuse) while responsibility does

Pain has no goal (maybe torturing us?) but responsibility does

Pain has no good effect on us, responsibility does.

I hate how our pain should be normal. Pain should be a sign that something is wrong in our body. But here, pain just for pain

I know my ideas are messed up

Im just mad and broken and wanted to talk about this

I feel like I’m going insane. I turned 18 almost two months ago and as I get older I realise that everything around me is so blatantly misogynistic.

where I come from, what I believe in, what I see online from my own communities makes me depressed, it’s bleak.

how do you guys cope with it. you could say stay off your phone but it’s everywhere I see. I don’t like interacting with people in real life from my community anymore, especially men, I’m sorry if you’re a man and that offends you but I am genuinely so wary, especially if you’re from my background, they can be really conservative sometimes.

rant over

I think a lot of women are settling for disappointing relationships in which men are either too much on the taker side (high sex drive and physical interest but very little desire to provide and take care of her) or too much on the giver side (high emotional intimacy, best friend kind of vibes, happy to provide and take care of her, but doesn't make her feel desired), and I think the reason why that is is that we, as women, aren't used to considering ourselves whorty and deserving of the whole damn package.

Our desires are often downplayed by the people around us to the point that we're not even sure we're allowed to want what we want. We feel ashamed for wanting more when we already have it good. When we dare to prioritize ourselves we're told we're selfish, and we are so used to feeling the lack of something that we think that's just a part of life and there's no way someone can ever have all their needs met. I think that's BS and it's time for a collective upgrade.

So, for a change, how about we start treating ourselves like we want others to treat us?

How about we start giving ourselves the attention, care, and recognition that we want to receive?

Go ahead and spend that extra time in the shower just because you like it. Buy that luxury hair product you've been wanting. Pick up field flowers and arrange them in a nice way on your kitchen table for your viewing pleasure. Spend an afternoon on your couch doing absolutely nothing. Treat yourself to something extra decadent when you're sad. Wear clothes that make you feel beautiful every single day. Spray lavender essence on your bed sheets. Dance sexy in front of the mirror. Leave words of affirmation scattered around your house for you to find. Massage your skin with natural oils and have iron strong boundaries to protect your peace of mind and emotional clarity because this is what you deserve and this is what you get to have.

I've been struggling a lot lately and feeling like I’m stuck in the same routine, spend too much time on my phone, and I keep putting off trying new hobbies. So I was thinking about maybe creating a small women only Discord community for women who want to be a little more intentional about how they spend their time, explore new interests, and encourage each other to get out of their comfort zones!

I was also thinking about sharing a daily or weekly prompt or mini-challenge that encourages us to do something in the real world. It could be trying a new hobby, exploring somewhere nearby, getting outside, doing something creative, or making time for connection with others. You could share what you did, post pictures if you wanted, or just chat with others.

I'd love for it to be a positive, low-pressure space where we can motivate each other, discover new things, and maybe make some friends along the way!

Would anyone be interested in something like this?

I'm in my early 20s now. I've kept this to myself for years because I could never bring myself to talk about it. I think it's mostly because I'm scared of being judged and honestly there's a lot of shame around it for me.

When I was around 3-4 years old, something happened that I still don't know if I should consider sexual assault or not.

I was in kindergarten at the time. The school had older students too (till 7th grade ig), and during breaks they would sometimes come to our classes and spend time with us. The school didn't have washrooms for little kids that we could use without help, so either the older students or the school nannies would accompany us.

There was this girl who was much older than me who used to take me to the washroom. She would carry me there and during that she would touch me inappropriately (touch and rub me down there). I don't know if it was intentional or if she knew what she was doing.

I obviously didn't understand what she was doing. I didn't know what sex was or anything like that. But I remember feeling really uncomfortable. I remember feeling anxious and wanting it to stop, even though I couldn't really understand what was wrong about it.

And weirdly, I remember being hesitant to tell anyone about it even back then. I don't know why. Maybe I was scared, maybe I felt embarrassed, or maybe I just didn't know how to explain what had happened. I was so young that I didn't even have the words for it. I just remember keeping it to myself.

The part that has always messed with me the most is that the sensation felt good.

I hate admitting that because it makes me feel disgusting, but that's how I remember it. I remember being anxious when it was break time cause I knew she would come to get me. She used to hold me tight and I remember I used to wiggle on her. I was uncomfortable and confused, but at the same time my body reacted to it in a way that felt good. I obviously had no idea what that meant at that age.

After that, I started touching myself, at 3 or 4 years old!and it's something I've continued doing throughout the years.

I've carried so much shame around this. Sometimes I feel like something sexual was introduced to me way too early and that it somehow "corrupted" me. I hate that it wasn't something I discovered myself. I hate thinking that something happened to me when I was so young that I couldn't even understand it, and somehow it stayed with me all these years.

I don't even know who I'm supposed to blame. It wasn't something I chose or started. I was a little kid. But I've continued doing it for years, and sometimes I still feel guilty and disgusted with myself because of that.

I have a boyfriend now and my libido is much higher than his, to a point where I'm disgusted with myself. Sometimes I genuinely wish it wasn't. And I don't know if that's connected to what happened when I was little or if I'm just overthinking everything.

If what happened to me was sexual assault, I hate the thought that something someone else did when I was a child could have affected me this much. I don't really know why I'm posting this and I don't think I've poured out everything I wanted to.. I guess I've just needed somewhere to say it for once.

Edit: I can't discuss this with anyone I know here in my country because I come from a place where matters related to sex are considered highly private and somewhat taboo to talk about openly

A few months ago, I found myself struggling to focus on my work. I work from home a lot and my office is a little over an hour away since I moved. Not to mention I have my kid in the summer and didn’t exactly want to pay $400 a month for my kid to go to daycare.

It all started in March. I got sick, my husband and I needed new cars and for his, while sick, I drove 4 hours back home and struggled. After that, I was in the ER for a bad reaction to strong cough medicine. Turns out my daily medication and cough medicine cannot mix and I was like a step or two behind having seizures.

Less than a month later, my kid’s cat got sick, quickly. We had to say goodbye. That hurt. He was only 11. I struggled to not be sad. My kid’s sports team, that I coached, some parents were shitty to me towards the end of the season for something I didn’t do, I was just the closest coach they could yell at.

May was Mother’s Day. We ended up finding a feral kitten from someone in our town and brought him home for the kid that morning. For the evening, we went to my parents. The trip ended with me hysterically crying because my dad said he never wanted to see me again, dont show up on Father’s Day, don’t go to his funeral.

June, I was struggling with that pain. My chest hurt from what my dad said. For Father’s Day, I still sent him pretzels from his favorite place. My mom called me saying I should go and I said no, I couldn’t. I was trying my best to not open that wound. My dad did eventually reach out to talk but I couldn’t handle it with how my brain was doing due to everything before that.

July. My company laid people off, unexpectedly. We’re a small company so a lot of us that stayed lost friends and coworkers we worked with daily. I felt at a loss. I couldn’t focus even more and struggled to get back on track.

At the start of August, my mom went to the hospital but didn’t tell me, just posted on Facebook. I did pick her up, drop her off, and go get her meds. I didn’t say much to my dad but I left saying, “I love you.” And he returned that. We still hadn’t addressed what he said.

By mid August, I was wondering if my brain alone was worth looking into taking a leave. I took a few more days to talk to my husband and therapist, as well as my doctor. Everyone agreed, take the time.

Before I could even talk to my boss in September, my dad got sick and was in the hospital because he couldn’t walk and had a bad infection. Good lord these last few weeks have been a terrible hell for my husband and me. I was at the hospital every other day driving two hours each way to grab my mom, bring her, then bring her home and go back to my place.

My dad was in the hospital for about 10 days before the hospital allowed him home, on hospice. While there, I did forgive my dad for what he said and he apologized. I told him I was going to do my best to get him home so he could die peacefully.

The hospital was ready to transport my dad home on a day I hadn’t planned to go to the hospital. I ended up going to make sure I could get his pain meds. We found out that the transportation needed $400 to be paid or if we paid after, it would be $1000+. I ended up taking my dad home myself. That was nerve wrecking. The nurses helped me get him into my car and when we got home, my husband and I put him on the walker we got him and literally carried him inside.

Two weeks later, the first week of October, my dad was gone. I was with him and my mom at the time he passed. From there, I had already been planning his funeral details so all my mom had to do was sign the check and go. I think I was able to get 90% of that done.

All while this is happening, my kid is a busy teenager doing several things and I have been trying so hard to not interrupt their life or activities. It’s hard because I don’t really want to go out or sit with people and make small talk. I’m too fucking sad for it.

I finally got my time off approved and I’ll be taking about 6 weeks off for my mental health.

Problem is, I feel like a fucking failure. I feel like I can’t shake my brain free of everything up there and like I can’t get over it to do my fucking job. I’m so tired all the time. I toss and turn and have needed something to sleep since the week my dad went to the ER. My brain will not shut off.

I’m nervous about taking this time but I hope I can return and get back to my fucking job.

TLDR: I’m taking 6 weeks off due to my mental health and many things in my life compounding how I feel. I feel like a failure for needed to take time off of work.

I really need some outside perspective from others because I feel like I am hitting a breaking point every single month. I’m 24 and have had a copper IUD for about a year now and my periods have become a nightmare. I bleed so heavily that I soak through a tampon in under an hour and bleed through period underwear in half a day. Right before my cycle starts I feel like there are literally zero nutrients left in my body, to the point of exhaustion where I sleep until noon and still need naps. Right now I’m just spotting but the physical symptoms are already overwhelming . I get breast soreness and the bloating, and i can’t stop eating and weakness. The past few days I’ve been nonstop eating and sleeping, i missed out seeing my friends because I have no energy. Today I used an 8mg nicotine pouch like I normally do and instantly felt faint, dizzy, and started dry heaving, which has never happened to me before. The emotional toll is destroying my sanity. For three weeks of the month my relationship feels fine. But the second my luteal phase hits and in the 48 hours right before bleeding, my emotional threshold vanishes. I develop a lot of rage, I think raise my voice without realizing it. Last night I started an argument with my boyfriend because he let me have half of his yogurt that he needed to take his meds with because he’s been really sick and is taking meds for a skin infection. He just told me to eat half and i didn’t realize i ate most of it. He told me that was mean of me and asked if i did it in purpose and i apologized, i genuially didn’t mean too and i felt awful. but then i felt intense sadness and then packed my bag and told him i want to to home because they way he said that sounded rude? Which started a huge argument where I was sobbing and couldnt come to reason. We were doing great but we always argue during or right before my period. Sometimes I get overwhelming urges to end my relationship that completely disappear once my period is underway. My boyfriend doesn't understand this and thinksI have anger issues or poor emotional regulation which only makes me spiral more. I tend to get in my head about things and I told my bf I think I have PMDD and he thinks it’s in my head and then he said I def don’t have it. has anyone with a copper IUD experienced this level of depletion and rage? Does this dynamic sound like PMDD or PMS. I have friends that have PMDD but they seem to have it way worse than me. I’m also anemic so that dosent help. I’m even on zoloft to help with my anxiety but i’m still a nightmare on my period and i feel awful and exhausting it’s like i become someone I’m not when I get it.

want to ask something.

did u girls notice that sometimes (really often) guys who court u or plan to date u see u as a countless set of stereotypes? llike, they cant even guess what u would like or not - they treat u like a typical pink princess and forget about ur personality.

likkkke... all the guys who wanted something with me (i didnt) tried to give me flowers and take me to fancy restaurants, even though I said a thousand times THAT I DON'T LIKE CAFES, RESTAURANTS, BARS, and all those places for food.

i have (as other girls do too) my own preferences and wishes. bbboy, why cant u recognize that im not just a girly-girl from ur stupid movies?i have my personality too.i have my hobbies.

it looks like they were just trying to find the easiest way to charm u.annoying,btw.

share with ur experience.

I have a gynecologist in 2 days and my period started today but I really don't want to cancel my visit since I waited 2 months already. My period was simply late

This will be my first time going too, and I really need to go because I need to get on birth control ASAP. What can she even check when I'm on my period?

Hopefully this isn’t too long but if it is I apologize in advance. I’m 21 and usually before the new year I like to shake off any bad lingering memories, habits, thoughts, etc! I want to go into the new year with confidence and less stress. I’m in therapy, I’m in college, I have a good social circle around me, I journal from time to time, I’m off social media (only go on to promote my artwork and then leave) and I try to keep a healthy lifestyle.

But other than those things, unfortunately I’m still struggling with my worth. There are some days where I’m confident and there are some days where I fake it to make it. When I was high school, I was sa’d freshman year, and it seemed like everyone around me didn’t take what I went through seriously. It got even worse when another woman in my family told me that what happened to me was good because it means boys think I’m pretty. I was 14 and I swear I think this really changed my brain in such a bad way.

From growing up, I thought my worth was tied to my body and men would only be attracted to me for my body, and this is where I struggled the hardest. At 19 was really my darkest moment because I remember I had a mental breakdown about feeling like I wasn’t thick enough. I didn’t like my toned arms. I don’t have a full bust and butt. It was a horrible time and I kept on weighing myself everyday because I was trying to gain weight during that time. It was so bad and I realized I think I was only trying to gain weight for male validation and not because I wanted to. Even when trying to put myself out in the dating scene, I always keep questioning the man’s intentions. Wondering if he actually likes me or does he want my body. Sometimes it’s not always the case but unfortunately my mind gets in the way.

Fast forward to now, it’s usually a battle with my body. one day I love it and the next I don’t. But I do however love my stretch marks, my curves, and my toned arms. :) I’m feeling a bit more confident about my chest especially since I’ve found out what my actual bra size is. I was 34 C before and I found out I’m a 32D. So theres been progress. I also stopped with the gaining weight thing because it can be mentally taxing. When I go to the gym, I remind myself that I’m only going to stay fit and healthy for myself. I shouldn’t treat my body like an aesthetic or object.

I want to try to release this mentality. Thankfully, I’m not all for male validation and I tend to focus on myself through hobbies, gym, etc. I was thinking of drawing body portraits of myself to remind myself that this is what my body actually looks like and not the one in my head. I think maybe the best compliment I’ve gotten on my body is when someone commented on one of my instagram posts saying my body gives Beyonce in 2005.

I know one day I’ll be happy with myself and that “boys think I’m pretty“ comment will leave my mind eventually but I feel like it’s still there. Any tips on how I can avoid internalizing this? I really want to go into the new year with bigger self-esteem or just in general.

So I started to become obsessed with the idea of being a succubus and being obsessed with men and I had a terrible mindset , I was obsessed with this guy who I thought was in love with me but when I would get tarot readings it was all a lie that I found out he's not my soul mate this whole time, it made me upset but I realized he has Instagram so I followed him but he didn't follow me back so it made me cry but I realized how stupid I am for losing myself over him so I was like fuck it I'm over him in just going to live my life as single and be happy and I then stopped caring about men and stopped being obsessed with the idea of a relationship and now I feel much more free

I feel like I’m on ozpemic or something. The thought of eating sounds so unrewarding- I had an uncrustable sandwich I think it’s called and it made me kind of gag. I feel like I’m a zombie that’s trying to eat a burger. Just won’t happen . I’ve had gum, I’ll try and order some fruit. Any real food sounds repulsive