My Future DIL asked guest to wear blue for their very small wedding (under 20 guests) four months ago. No mention of any other item. She told us they are having a handfasting at the ceremony. My family and my husbands family are of Scottish descent-(dad was Scottish) we live in the USA. So I got out my tartan sash and two months prior to the wedding I told my son I was going to wear it. Three weeks prior to the wedding I was told not to wear it-and to choose between wearing it or not going to the ceremony. I was taken aback by the demand-I won’t be wearing it -but I am very disappointed that we can’t show our tartans. I’ve never heard of a bride controling the accessories-and I do have an all blue suit to wear. Is this something brides do these days? AITA for feeling miffed?

My wife (F26) and I (M29) have a daughter who just turned 1 year old yesterday. We are planning to go to dinner tomorrow and we invited her parents, my in laws, and our daughter’s grandparents. My wife just dropped on me about an hour ago without consulting me first that she thought we would pay for us and her parents at dinner. I was surprised because I thought it’s kind of our celebration for our daughter that we invited them to and because my wife and I are in a very tough financial situation right now and in debt, which her parents are well aware of. I even told my wife that if we weren’t in the financial situation we’re in, I would have absolutely no issue paying for them, even if it were at a 5 star restaurant. Also, they are my daughter’s grandparents and our daughter is currently their only grandchild and probably will be for some time. If you had a grandchild and they were your only grandchild, wouldn’t you want to take them to do something or plan an event for their 1st birthday? And if you did obviously a 1 year old can’t pay their own way. So would you send your son or daughter or your son in law or sister in law, the child’s parents, the bill for taking them out to celebrate or planning the event? If my daughter blesses me with a grandchild someday I know for damn sure I would want to take my grandchild out to celebrate or plan a 1st birthday event for them, even if it was at my expense. I would even insist it be at my expense because I would be so overjoyed to have a grandchild.

My main opposition is the finances and I know my mother in law and no offense but when she knows she’s not paying the tab she is great at spending other people’s money and ordering the absolute most expensive meal and absolute most expensive alcoholic beverage possible. It’s happened with us before where literally everybody else can eat for $20-$30 and there is my mother in law eating for $50-$60, for example. But when she actually offers to pay the tab when I her son in law is included on the tab, she’ll tell my wife something to the effect of oh that’s a little expensive or we don’t have any money when it’s like $15-$20 in the same example above. If I’m in the wrong and am being the asshole, I don’t mind hearing and accepting it. I just feel like we are inviting my wife’s parents, my in laws, to our birthday celebration for our daughter, why can’t my wife and I pay our part and they pay their part, especially when they haven’t taken our daughter out for her birthday or planned an event for her that they already paid for. Would be interested to hear what people think and how I might be able to get my wife to at least see where I’m coming from. She wouldn’t even really listen to what I had to say and just kept cutting me off.

Can’t post pictures here so here’s the actual text message thread from our messages

Context: I fell asleep on my brother couch 2 weeks ago and wake up to a phone call from my friend asking to bring her home from the bar (I declined bc it was 1am). Tonight me and her are ubering home bc we are too drunk to drive and this is the conversation we had in the uber (she told me to be more quiet)

Friend: I'm shushing you becayse of my uber rating
They rate lower when ur loud and drunk

Me: OH-

Friend: Yea...
So maybe just listen to me
Bc when do I ever shush you (said as a joke)

Me: Mind you as a teen I've biked to ur apartment???? (Said as a joke)

Friend: I begged you for a ride when I was drunk on the side of the road and you said you didn't feel bad be because I could afford an uber
Even tho im jobless
You would not

Me: Pulling the jobless card

Friend: I literally blew up ur phone bc l needed a ride and u said u didn't even feel bad
The NEXT day
Even tho u answered every text

Me: never did
I didn't say that
I said I can't pick you up but not that I felt bad respectfully

Friend: You literally sent me a voice memo saying you didn't feel bad because you knew I could buy an uber respectfully

Me:
It was late and I KNOW I did not send a voice memo. I wouldn't of
Also I send voice memos to certain people bc I know they will listen to them and ur not one of them.
we never send voice messages to each other so I'm pretty positive I would of never sent a voice message

Idk am I mad for nothing? I’m pretty frustrated rn but it’s not my responsibility to pick her up from the bar at 1am especially if I wasn’t asked earlier in the night. If she asked me EARLIER in the night I would have said yes but I wasn’t asked until 1am…..

I’ve been in my schools cultural alliance since I was a freshman and I’ve wanted to run for a leadership position ever since I joined. leadership position are only open for juniors. last year I asked my friend if she wanted to join the club, explained it and told her that I was planning on running for vice president at the end of the year. I went to every club meeting and ran bake sales by myself. but they had to move the elections to this year instead of the end of last year. My friend decided she wanted to run for the same position as me because she thought it would look good on a college application and she had nothing. I have 5 other leadership positions so I don’t need to have it for college but I wanted it because I really care about the club. This year we did the election on our interest meeting day and she one because none of the new people no knew either of us but the people who were in the club all voted for me. it turns out their was a miscount and that I was supposed to win. They are giving me the position but now my depend friend is mad that I got the position. What should I do? I don’t understand why she’s mad when she was gloating about her win when she thought she had won.

This might seem immature to ask, but I just wanna know because I (M 26) truly cant wrap my head around the fact that my wife (F 25) claims me asking her to watch and catch a couple games on Sundays with some friends, since its literally the only sport i'm into watching, is inconsiderate to her time and one of her days off work that she'd wanna spend it with me. Its not every Sunday btw, i'd say like every other week, or maybe even once every 3 weeks. Is she entitled to that time of mine and where i decide to spend it? If so i'm totally not against just giving her what she wants IF that's whats morally correct. I love my wife please nobody bad mouth her nor I and be kind, thanks.

IMy family has been asking me for money for months, and I’ve always tried to help when I can. Recently, I found out that some of the money I gave them went toward unnecessary purchases while they continued telling me they couldn’t afford their bills.

I decided I wasn’t going to lend them any more money until they got their finances under control. Now they’re saying I’m selfish and that family should help family regardless of the circumstances.

I understand that everyone makes mistakes with money, but I don’t think I should have to sacrifice my own financial stability because someone else refuses to manage theirs.

Would I be the asshole for standing my ground, or is family supposed to come before everything else?

My (22m) girlfriend (23f) had been feeling a bit sick last weekend. She came over last Friday, spent the night, I made us dinner and took care of her and all that. The next day, I actually did have plans to hang out with some friends, and I don't really feel comfortable leaving my girlfriend at my place when I'm not there so I was kind of nudging her to see herself out.

She asked why she had to leave since it'd just be her and my sister (parents are away and will be for some time, my sister lives two floors up), and I told her that I just didn't think she'd want to be here if I wasn't home, even if she was just resting or whatever. I told her i could drive her home, and after that her demeanor really changed when i suggested she head out. She ended up driving herself home. She got home fine. and when I texted her after the hangout with my friends, she was being very short with her responses. One of the friends i was with, she said I was kind of a dick for just leaving her to dilly dally. But, I'm 22 and my life can't just stop because of someone I've been dating for like 6 months.

I ended up calling my gf, and when I asked her what was wrong she called me a d**k for making her leave and making her hang out by herself when she wasn't feeling well and hung up. AITA?

Throwaway account. My boyfriend of almost 3 years and I are looking for a place together. He has 2 huge dogs and due to that, our options are limited (yard needed).

He recently accepted a position that will require him to travel 6 months out of the year (not consecutively). Currently, he has to travel for a few weeks to a month or so out of the year and boards the dogs when he travels. When we move in together, it’s on me to watch them and care for them when he’s gone. He understands this is a huge ask, but I don’t think he understands HOW huge. I also work full time, and I don’t have dogs for this reason. They’re huge, require a lot, are high energy (especially one of them), and just thinking about it stresses me out. They’re his responsibility - not mine.

Anyway, I was thinking about charging him half the rate of what it costs to board them since this will be a huge undertaking, but I don’t know if that’s crazy. It feels like a lot of extra work to take care of 2 animals that aren’t my responsibility for 6 months out of the year. If it was a couple weeks or a month I wouldn’t mind. But 6 months out of the year every year… indefinitely? It seems like a lot. WIBTA?

Edit: thank you so much to everyone who took the time to comment and share your thoughts/views from the YTAs to the NTAs and in between. It’s helped me gain some perspective outside my own head, so I greatly appreciate it.

AITA My husband’s niece is 5 years old, and she insists on sleeping in our bedroom and in our bed. I honestly feel very uncomfortable with this situation, especially because my husband encourages it and refuses to set a boundary.

We have actually arranged a separate room for her, and her mother (my sister-in-law) and grandmother (my mother-in-law) are also nearby. But she is very stubborn and insists that she will sleep only with her uncle. She even gets upset when we try to close or lock our bedroom door.

This situation has caused many ugly arguments between my husband and me. Whenever I question him about it, he becomes angry and has even told me that he will send me out of the house. I feel like my feelings and boundaries are not being respected at all.

What hurts me the most is that I feel my husband’s priorities are always his mother, sister, his sister’s child, and other members of his family. I don't feel like I have a place in his priorities as his wife.

I am married and we don't have children yet. I am currently undergoing fertility treatment, and this situation is affecting me emotionally and putting a lot of pressure on my marriage. Sometimes I even feel insecure that my husband may not value me because we don't have a child.

I have always supported my husband financially and stood by him regarding his health and other difficulties, so it is painful to feel that my efforts and feelings don't matter to him.

I genuinely want to understand:

• Is this kind of attachment or insistence from a 5-year-old normal, or should adults be setting boundaries?

• Is it common for Indian couples to face situations like this with extended family?

• If you were in my situation, would you consider this something to adjust to, or would you feel that it is crossing a reasonable boundary?

• Most importantly, how should a husband and wife handle a situation like this without allowing it to damage their marriage?

I am extremely stressed and confused right now. I don't want to overreact, but I also don't want to keep sacrificing my comfort and marital relationship just to avoid conflict.

What you people do in this case? As I am really struggling with this issue constantly and how do you handle such situation. I really lover my husband but he doesn't reciprocate

So what started this was my family and parent friends went out to celebrate a recent birthday for my parents. Its a new place we never been but my mom coworker hyped it up. Well I was planning on paying for myself and my mother. Meal is over and bill comes, and the server tells us we cant split it based on what we ordered individually. The place was expensive and quality food wasn't great imo. I personally didnt want to go to this place, based on the prices and pictures I seen on Google when my family first mentioned it.

But to spring something like that up at the end seem wrong. That should be lead with up front by the restaurant , Otherwise I would have stood strong and told my family no to this place.

So on top of this, for me personally, I had plans to pay off my Credit card by next week, from working over 60 hours plus this week to take care of that debt, so I can start saving money, since my job isnt as secure job like my family have. I been excited for this.

But anyway I was the person that had to pay and others couldn't get their zelle to work, and had to use the bit of money in my account to cover the bill since I refuse to drop another 1000 dollars on my credit card. My wife made a a remark that I felt was rude, in regards to me not wanting to use my credit card that I planned on paying off next week. We had a heated exchange in the ride home over that part. I understand its ok to be mad about a pop up situation like this, but not ok to drop a rude remark to somebody trying to cope in the moment on something they didnt plan.

edit: I forgot to mention that I been telling my wife my plans for paying off my Credit card all week. so I been pretty excited about it, but she been dismissive about it and rather I not do that since she only pay the minimum on her cards. but she has a far more stable career than I do, so maybe having debt like that dont bother her as much as it does me. so the rude remark in the moment kind of triggered me and i was just explaining how i felt that was rude. she stormed out the car once i got tomy parents house to get her vehicle to drive back home, since she rode with me to the restaurant. just added proper context.

Cant help but feel like this all would have been avoided , Had we went to outback steakhouse or something. Could have had better food and cheaper price and still split the bill based on what we ordered individually.

I (40F) have mesophonia. There are certain sounds that I really don't like.

My husband (50M) and I have been married for 11 years, so he's very aware of the sounds that bother me. Some can't be controlled, like eating a banana. It doesn't matter how you eat the banana, it will always sound gross to me. I don't criticize the way he eats a banana, but I don't like it when he comes to sit next to me while he eats it. This morning he did, so I just got up and went to the kitchen. I don't see this as a big deal, but he gets personally offended by it. I explained that it has nothing to do with him, and that there is no one I would want to sit next to while they ate a banana.

The problem is there are other sounds that he CAN control, but even after 11 years of telling him it bothers me, he continues to do. For example, he chews his fingers constantly while we watch tv and I need to tell him to stop. He also chews with his mouth open while we watch tv. He doesn't do it otherwise, I think it's just when he's distracted by what we are watching. And he bites his fork when he eats. Aside from these things though, I don't tell him he needs to change anything. Sounds bother me, it is what it is. And it's not personal.

He tells me I am trying to "normalize" it by calling it mesophonia, and he says it's hard for him when I get up and walk away. I get frustrated that he takes it so personally when I have explained again and again that it has nothing to do with him. I also get frustrated that he doesn't seem to care to change the things that are within his control, like chewing his fingers and biting his fork, which are not really polite things to be doing anyways.

Am I the asshole for removing myself when there are sounds I don't like, and for asking my husband to not do certain things that I find really unpleasant?

Hi! Me and my friend (both 17F) were good friends since junior high. We both considered each other as best friends.
Our birthdays are both during exam season so we always plan a date post exam for presents and generally just catching up. (We attend different high school) My friend would sometimes become vague about whether she actually wanted to meet up. She is always very excited about planning about meeting up during exam season but when it really ends she kind of ghosts me. This wasn’t the first time it happened.
Last exam season the one before the conflict, she was exactly the same. Very anticipated about our plans during exams then ghosting me after. Her reason was the same: upset at our exam scores. It was her birthday during that exam season and I really spent much time and my money to prepare her birthday present-I wanted to show my appreciation including a handwritten note. So I asked her if we could meet up just shortly for her gift which she agreed and we were able to hang out for a couple hours. Everything I had to ask first. This post exam season, it repeated again. Me waiting for her clear reply. I brought this up and explained that the issue wasn’t necessarily whether we met but the lack of clear communication. I thought I was only putting the effort and was afraid if I was the only one who cared much for our friendship. She did apologize for making me feel like that but repeatedly told me that I called her indecisive and made her into a bad person.
I want to clarify that I didn’t curse or insult her. Maybe excluding calling her indecisive.
But the thing is, I kept telling her if I was misunderstanding or if I was overreacting. But she didn’t give me a reply to those questions and told me I was too harsh on her. This point I was pretty upset about because I was very upset with my exam results but reached out first because I remember our promise and our anticipation for our plans. She didn’t reach out again until I did in person. First time it didn’t go smoothly, the second time I made an effort to maintain our friendship- we both knew things couldn’t go how they were but I asked her if we could just say hi when we saw each other which she agreed to. When I met her I really smiled to try make her comfortable but when it was her saying hi first she tried not to smile and look upset. And avoided eye contact. I appreciated her making the effort although I didn’t really understand why she tried to look tough and upset when I took down my pride and smiled at her. The greeting became frequent and when I noticed and felt this relationship wasn’t going anywhere I found my self avoiding her trying not to be seen. It seems she felt the same way because she didn’t greet me first when we saw each other. And her averting gaze made me feel discouraged to say hi. Our relationship became distant and I don’t think it can go back to how it was. And I know it’s childish of me but I never got my bday present.

I saw a similar post about this yesterday so I'm posting my own to hear opinions.

My daughter is 16 and recently completed her drivers education classes that she was doing with the school. The class ends at 6, but last Thursday they had their last class which was dedicated to the final to pass the class. After they were done with the test they were allowed to leave and my daughter told me so, but never told me what time to pick her up. She couldn't call me either because she doesn't have a phone right now. Long story short, she got it taken at school enough (twice) times to where we have to go and get it, and my wife and I decided we wouldn't go and get it until the end of the term which is late October. So she hasn't had it for about a week and a half.

Because she didn't give me an exact time, I just showed up at 4:45 (exam started at 4) in case she was still testing or worst case she was waiting for a bit. But she never came out. So I called my son (13) and he said that she was walking into the house at that very time I called. So I went back home.

When I asked her why she walked, she said she finished at 4:15 and I wasn't there, and she "didn't know anyone" so she didn't ask to borrow anyone's phone and didn't have one to call me. And other people were still taking the test and those who finished just got up and left. I thought that was fine, didn't think anything of it.

My daughter told my wife and she was kind of mad at me for letting her walk home, and started to rethink the phone thing now. My wife said she didn't like that because it's 'unsafe,' but we live in one of the safest suburbs in one of the safest states in the country. And according to my daughter nothing happened, so it's no big deal. It's only a 30 minute walk. This whole thing wouldn't have happened if our daughter wasn't using her phone in school, so that's on her.

My wife (and my daughter) seemed to be kind of pissed at me the next day, so posting to see if I'm the AH.

Hi, throwaway here since my friends know my main.

Backstory: So, my (22F) BF’s (23M) birthday is on October 15th. He usually spends his birthdays with his parents. He drives to their house to enjoy his birthday. He invites me to come to their house. I usually deny and he is fine with that. I then usually use that day for some free-time.

This year, I wanted him to feel special, so I decided to plan a party for him. I told him I want him to spend his birthday here, and he was okay with it. I had decided on the decorations, and needed to decide for the cake. He likes nuts and bananas, to the point where instead of snacking on stuff like chips, he snacks in them instead. I am not a big fan of them however. I knew he would like a banana-flavoured cake with nuts on top, but I absolutely hated the idea that I would not get to enjoy a slice of his cake. I decided to get him my favourite cake, a dark chocolate cake since I had never seen him eat it before.

On his big day, he drove to work at 7:30 AM, and I had 8 hours to complete all the decorations and pick up the cake from the bakery. I finished the decorations by 12:30PM, and I had 3 hours remaining. I booked an Uber and picked up the cake from the bakery. I then invited his parents and siblings to the party. I had everything finished. He arrived at 4PM and he was so suprised that I had put up all these decorations up for him! He gave me a hug and thanked me. His parents and siblings were there too and me and them gave him gifts and he was so happy!

We then started eating the cake, but he seemed to stop eating it after a couple small bites. I asked why, and he replied that “I don’t like bitter things”. I thought he was lying and was going to pull up a joke like “kidding”. He was serious. At the end of the party, he was still extremely grateful and happy.

His older brother came up after the party and told me that I should’ve picked a cake he liked, or I could’ve called them if I didn’t know what cake he wanted. I was extremely angry and told him the cake he liked, banana-flavoured with nuts was one of my least favourite cakes. He then told me that I made his birthday about him and how I would feel if I was given a cake I didn’t like on my birthday. I told him he was just trying to provoke an argument because he was extremely grateful for the other things I did for him. He then told me some more stupid stuff that I ignored. I kept saying it was an experience for him that I thought he could enjoy.

I’ve now blocked him and he can’t pester me anymore. I do feel bad however so I’m coming to ask AITA for allowing my BF to try a new cake.

I am 18 pansexual female, my sister(14) and my mother are straight Christian people. They hate anything I say that can be taken as any type of "homosexual lingo" (my mother's words), and are openly homophobic to me and anyone else who is gay.

So tonight we are all sitting in my room watching the movie Pitch Perfect, I love this movie I love the characters, the actors, and I love the chemistry between the girls. Now i do ship Chloe and Becca and idk maybe it's just obvious to me but they are all really gay, from Chloe seeing Becca naked, to all the dances in the finale, and even having a lesbian character.

Well we're getting to the end and I look in the background as they are doing the finale and notice Fat Amy and Aubrey's dance and I point it out, my mom and sister laugh and I go to say "you know what, they have the most chemistry out of like everyone" (ik I should have kept my mouth shut)

But I can't even get the words out before my sister stands up and tells me to SHUT UP and that I don't need to ruin this movie for her by making it gay. My mother just stares at me while my sister starts going on about how not everything is gay, this movie isn't gay, and that I'm very selfish for making it seem that way.

She finally stopped yelling, and it got to the part where Becca and Jessie kissed, and she started cheering saying "see, straight people are way better, its not disgusting when they kiss"

The movie ends I take the disc out of the DVD player and put it back on my shelf my sister takes it and says she's taking it to her room so I don't "make it gay" and that she hates me. So AITAH?

My boyfriend and I recently had an argument over a comment he made about my body, and I'm genuinely curious whether I'm overreacting.

For context, I've recently started working out. The other day, completely unprompted, my boyfriend told me something along the lines of, "Now that you're going to the gym, your butt is going to become firm."

I immediately felt offended.

To me, the wording matters. He didn't say my butt would become firmer or even more toned. He said it would become firm, which, to me, implies that he doesn't think it is firm right now.

And since having a firm butt is generally considered an attractive physical feature, I interpreted his comment as indirectly saying that there's something about my current body that could be improved.

What bothers me even more is that I actually like my butt the way it is. I wasn't complaining about it, asking for advice, or expressing any desire to change it. His comment came completely out of nowhere.

I also used to struggle with body insecurities when I was younger, and his comment brought some of those feelings back.

When I explained why I was upset, he tried to reassure me that he didn't mean my butt was unattractive now. He regularly compliments my body and tells me he finds me attractive, so I have no particular reason to believe he's lying about that.

However, I still find his explanation difficult to reconcile with what he actually said. I feel like he wouldn't have made the same comment to someone who already had a very firm butt, which makes me think he genuinely sees mine as lacking that characteristic.

At the same time, I recognize that noticing a physical feature that could change with exercise doesn't necessarily mean finding that feature unattractive in its current state.

I don't expect my boyfriend to think every single part of my body is physically perfect. But I also don't understand why he felt the need to spontaneously point out how exercise would supposedly improve a part of my body I already feel good about.

So, AITA for getting upset over his comment, even though he insists he didn't mean anything negative by it?

UPDATE:
I think some context is missing here. I didn’t meet him wearing cowboy attire or acting like a cowboy. This is a persona he’s adopted since we started seeing each other. It’s not just the hat and boots, but also a fake accent and the constant “Cowboy” act. I initially thought it was a phase or a joke, but it seems to have become his everyday personality.
I just wasn’t expecting the person I started seeing to suddenly take on an entirely different persona. I can respect that he’s free to wear what he wants, while also acknowledging that I’m finding this new character unattractive.

ORIGINAL:
I’m F26 seeing a guy M25. We’ve only recently started seeing each other so at first I thought this whole cowboy thing was funny and would eventually wear off… well apparently not. He wears a felt cowboy hat and cowboy boots EVERYWHERE and likes to go by “Cowboy.” He didn’t grow up around country life or ranching, nor does he work in that environment.

Today I had to see him and he showed up wearing the hat, cowboy boots AND JEANS TUCKED INTO THE BOOTS. I immediately told him that if he was going to wear that combo he needs to untuck his jeans. He started arguing with me saying that’s how “real cowboys wear them.” Sir… you’re not currently standing in mud or shit. He goes to pull his jeans out to fix them AND I REALISE HIS JEANS ARE TOO TIGHT TO EVEN FIT OVER HIS BOOTS!

I laughed I tried not to but I just couldn’t take it seriously anymore. I couldn’t believe we were actually having a debate about cowboy attire when he was wearing skinny jeans that wouldn’t even fit over his boots. I know actual cowboys sometimes tuck their jeans into their boots so I’m not saying it’s never a thing. But this man has recently adopted the whole look and was defending it so seriously like it’s in his blood.

I know people can dress however they want, and I’m not trying to dictate what someone wears. But it’s literally all I ever see him wear. We live in the city and I just find the whole thing a little embarrassing. He walks around like he’s a full-time cowboy and I genuinely don’t understand it.

So, AITA? Should I have kept my opinions to myself and let him wear what he wants or??

I (16F, who has AuDHD) was a Sophomore in HS when everything happened in January. He (17M) was a Junior in my 9th period gym class. The class was a small cardio room, not a large school gymnasium.

As a person with AuDHD, I am very socially deprived. At the same time, however, I also really wanted to have a tight friend group, or even at some point; a partner.

He walking towards a piece of workout equipment and I was walking towards his direction. He performed an odd action, like he paused then gasped for no apparent reason. Then, he seemed to go back to the backpack area (it was behind a receptionist desk) and just sit still and "hide"? At the time, it seemed like clumsy attraction.

I began to notice more of his actions afterwards, but I was also just paying attention to him. I read all of these actions as "socially awkward with interest". The most he did was brush against me in the halls, prolonged eye contact, etc. Honestly, I enjoyed this perceived attention and he seemed cute at the time.

However, as the year progressed it became a really complex issue. People began to react to me differently, and I began to view his actions in a different way. My friends and I became very distant, and people in the halls began to make faces at me and even his friends would pass me in the halls- they would make faces or they would smirk at me.
I became highly anxious at the end of April (Mind you, I experienced medical and mental health issues from March to June) and I became confused and hyper-vigilant of my surroundings.

At the beginning of May, I did find interest in another guy- who was interested in me as well, but suddenly, they pulled away from me and began giving me silent treatment for 2 months. I became very anxious after this, and I retraced my steps back to the 1st guy. So, at the beginning of June, I reported him to the principal for indirect sexual harassment. I did not feel secure much longer and I began to view his actions in a different way.

Over the summer, I began to think everything over and I still thought that he had interest in me, but I misunderstood his intention. I reached out to him and a neutral female friend (17F) to apologize and expand my perspective. When I first spoke to her, I told her the honest truth and full story- but I didn't understand the full situation and I couldn't explain it clearly. I told her my anxious thoughts. I spoke to her for a month. Recently, they've been pulling away from me and they give me crude names.

Looking back, I can see that I misinterpreted his actions and everyone's actions that followed; but I couldn't piece that together until somewhere around October. Also, during the situation; no one ever said anything to me-which would've been so very helpful. I am afraid I have gotten myself in a sticky and horrible situation, and I really don't know why or how it has happened.

AITA for never saying anything and reading their actions, or are they TAHs for never saying anything to me?

I (34F) booked a beach house in Galveston, Texas a year ago for a trip in November. We are bringing my parents and our five kids.

About a month ago, one of our friends (a couple) said they were coming with their teenager and booked a condo literally next door to our beach house.

I was fine with that because we've traveled together before. But then, just a few weeks before the trip, they invited another family to come. That family also booked a condo in the same building next door.

Eventually, I ended up mentiononing that i thought it would be common courtsey to run it by me before inviting other people. After all, who they invite impacts us ​​and they have friends I would NOT want to spend time with.

My friend said they were under no obligation to mention it to me since they are not staying in our house. They acted like it was crazy for me to suggest that.

AITA?

Edited to add: The whole reason they joined our vacation was so we could all hang out.

My wife and me married for 4 years now. My main issue is the conversation around friends and family where she talks more than 60% of the time all random talks, brings her opinions constantly on replies, and assumes everyone should agree to it or make her the center of the conversation and engage in her conversation. Sometimes, If she also randomly switches/starts the conversation that pops in her head during the other conversation.

And the other factor is she drinks a bottle of wine every event. And this mostly intensifies when she is tipsy or drunk. This is mostly worse when she is drunk.

She constantly forces her opinion and challenges why she is wrong when someone brings their opinion to the table. She cant let it go unless she understands it(which is rare) and keeps on talking even when everyone agrees to "everyone has their own opinion". But she continues. I on the other hand try to end the conversation by distracting or lets end this topic, but she wont let it go. I bring this up instantly in the car while going home and turns into a big mess or curs*ng and we have a big fight. She cant understand that she is overtalking, over sharing and trying to enforce her view when everyone is entitled to their on view and non stopp blah blah...

AITA for figuring this out, pointing her out. I dont know what to do with my married life. What happens when we have kids. Overall i also think this might be the alcohol thing.(she is not a overdrinker but is one of our major cause of fight) But she will never quit alcohol/vape the way i see it now.

I feel kinda guilty about the way I said it but it’s the absolute truth.

For context we have been friends for about 15 years very close friends but I’ve always been careful what I tell her because she gossips a lot and likes to spin things to her been a victim when she’s actually a bit of social climber and will befriend people she doesn’t really like and bitch about them. A few years ago she told me and few other women I know that her then good friend had stolen money from her in a business deal, she told everyone this women was thief but never ever confronted this women. To this day the women has no idea that everyone thinkd she’s a thief.

Anyway my friend rings me a lot throughout the day if I don’t answer she will ring again like half hour later till I answer. She never has anything to actually say it’s usually complaining about ppl or telling me gossip about other ppl. Shes not a bad person but I do find it exhausting and annoying and draining but many just really annoying. If she’s busy you don’t hear from her. Like when her husbands home or a weekend we rarely talk. Well last night after a couple glasses of wine I text her and said I find it really draining that’s she rings me multiple times a day to either complain or bitch. I said she was fake and very negative and I find it to much. Nether the less she was really upset. I text her this morning and apologised and said we are all guilty of it but I’m finding it draining.

She had been triggering me all day talking about a women she’s very close with and I just lost my cool.
I don’t want to hurt her but I’m kinda glad I’ve said it because now she’s not gunna ring me 5 times a day to talk nonsense.

I'm 36 and my wife is 37. We have a son and a daughter who are 6 and 3.. Around a year ago my wife was interested in trying for another (she always wanted like 3-4, i've always wanted 2, I assumed she'd change her mind but she didn't), but 2 was enough for me. So, I made a slideshow about why we should only have 2. I was just trying to make the whole thing not as serious by making a lighthearted slideshow. Nonetheless, lots of emotions were involved (mostly on my wife's side). She was very sad (+ a little bit mad) about the whole thing. She's mostly over it by now I believe.

I was going through my files recently and I found the slideshow. My wife and I were having a good time at the moment, but when I said "look at what I found" and showed her the slideshow her smile disappeared off her face instantly. I was looking through it (I was probably going to trash it) and I did let out a laugh or two looking at some of the points, but I looked over at my wife she was straight-faced. Even after I trashed it, I asked her what was wrong because she was still quiet, and she said that me laughing at that made her feel a type of way. She told me "You know why I don't like that," but I wasn't even making a big deal out of the slideshow i just took a quick run-through and trashed it. I apologized, but said that she should relax a bit, because I wasn't laughing at her, but at the slideshow which is independent of the kid thing.

AITA? A good night turned into a sour one because she just turned around and scrolled instead of talking to me, after saying "Don't tell me to relax."

I (30F) am getting married in December to another woman (30F). As a child of immigrants, my parents were really confused and not super happy when I first came out to them. It’s gotten a lot better now, though. They always say that they like my fiancée but there have been several moments of homophobia as well as disrespect towards her, her family, and her race (she is black).

I’ve always imagined having a father/daughter dance but lately I’ve been frustrated with my parents because they’re just breaking boundaries and not being respectful. My older sister got married a few years ago and she did NOT do a father/daughter dance and I know it hurt my dad. I know my younger sister has zero plan to marry and if she does, she won’t do a father daughter dance either because she and my sister don’t have a great relationship with my parents either.

I’m stuck because I know my dad wants to do it, and the younger version of me wants that too, but I’m also really frustrated with my parents right now. I don’t want to regret not doing it either. It’s all just confusing and frustrating. What do you all think? WIBTA if I don’t do the dance with my dad?

i’ve been working at a small business the past few years on and off, and the business has grown from a home-based business to now a corporate scale company. i’ve known my boss and worked for them for about 8-9 years (leaving out their gender/age cos idw to dox myself) - i’ve been working for them a lot more recently since i’m a freelancer and i havent been getting enough gigs to pay off bills/rent so i work part time for this company to get some money to feed myself.

and to the issue at hand - there are about 3 other people who work daily for my boss and they are all taking their holidays in the same week as my boss’s birthday. i didn’t hear much about it in my emails / work chats until today, when my boss found out they will probably have to work on their birthday since no one else is available to work in that week. what’s upsetting is that the boss’s messages to the group chats was incredibly disrespectful and insulting, they mentioned how it was unfair for all our employees to be unavailable to work during the week of their birthday and began complaining about how they aren’t going to have even one day off in that week to celebrate. what’s even worse is that taking leaves on birthdays isn’t something this business has enforced as a rule - the rest of us have all worked on our birthdays and we usually do a mini celebration for the birthday person during lunch and let them off early IF the work day isn’t busy - it was mostly an unspoken rule that no one genuinely cared since we’re all adults and birthdays are just unimportant to us, i guess not as important as it is to our boss

as of right now the boss’s birthday week is still just one other person being available to work - it’s also the week that makes the most sense for employees to go on holiday since it won’t be busy as we saw last year, some of us are contemplating asking our boss to close our doors during that week since they’re so concerned about having to work on their birthday but we’re not sure if we might be risking getting fired or a paycut as punishment

my boss texted me asking me to work but i’ve already had plans for a roadtrip that week - so aita for leaving them on read??

So I (27F) am not a big dog lover. Call it a red flag or whatever but I really am not a big fan of a majority of dogs, tho I do enjoy them on a case-by-case basis. I’m mostly a cat person because they match my vibe. A girl in my friend group we’ll call Tina (28F) just recently got a dog which is a “Mini Golden Bernadoodle”. While I feel lightly negatively about most dogs, I feel STRONGLY negative about any of the doodles. I could go on a tangent about why I dislike them but a big one is that they’re really just poorly bred mutts with a big price tag and (in my experience) doodles are very anxious and reactive. They’re a major wildcard and I don’t really trust them.

Tina brought her puppy to a hangout one night and while I understand he’s a puppy, he was humping and peeing on everything and would jump on you and lick on your face. And instead of correcting him, Tina thought it was so cute and silly of him. I pushed him off me because he was getting all in my face and nipped my nose while licking me and she made a comment how I was being too rough and if I have a problem she would pull him off if I say something.

I was talking to my closer friends in the group about it and I flat out said I won’t be going to things where Tina’s puppy is going to be because I don’t have the patience for it. They think I’m being cruel towards the puppy and I was showing my obvious distain for him even before he was all over me and I should give the dog/Tina another chance.

AITA?