Wueh.

So I went to westlands to celebrate my best friend's birthday last night. Needless to say I saw A LOOOOOT. From one guy being physically carried out of the club by three other people to someone falling headfirst into a toilet bowl. His pants unceremoniously began to fall down and the girl who fell in the toilet was to busy puking to notice her wig falling into the toilet.

The worst of it was watching a couple fight about eggs . Mayai pasua bro. I was peacefully smoking my cigarette when shorty slapped the living daylights out of mandem for refusing to buy her an egg. It was not a casual or joking slap . The dudes head went in two directions at once man. Two damn directions.

Alcohol never used to do this to us when I was younger. These Samsung z folds people are drinking will kill us. Just smoke weed guys.

Thanks guys. Vanessa has since been suspended

Context is on my previous post but basically she made posts copying verbatim from my page on Reddit.

If you don't know what depression is. Just kneel down and thank God.

Let me try and explain what I feel right now. I live a life that is totally not mine. This is because I have worked so hard to live a better life. But no I live the shittiest life ever. My brain is working against me. I forgot what happiness feels like.

I know most of you will never understand this. Have you ever tried your best and nothing is working out? Showing up everyday but it is all in vain.

I woke up in the morning with a slight headache(Due to stress) took a painkiller. Since I am living in a shitty apartment and everyone is trying to show off who woofer is the loudest I couldn't sleep cause of the noise. The headache couldn't go away since I was still stressed on where to get money for lunch and supper.

This is just an instance of today.

When it comes to getting a job I have tried my best and well luck isn't on my side.

I really wish …. Before I the wish .... The reason I am writing this post is because some suicidal thoughts are racing my mind. Like I really don't know how to live.

The worst part is nobody is understanding me. To make the matters worse then only person I wish to tell me all is going to be okay ..... I love him so much but he just doesn't understand what I am going through.

I am depressed, I am lost, I am feeling empty... the worst part is I am alone. Whatever I am going through is a lot and I cant write all here but if you have some kind words they will make a difference . I have no one to tell me I will be okay. Just tell me all this is going to pass. Please.

Everyone around me just keeps tabs on how much I am a failure but nobody sees how much I fight with my mind everyday. Nobody sees how I struggle to be okay....

The text has lots of typos and it isnt flowing .... I am fighting for my life please understand.

My wife is leaving me. I always thought this is what I always wanted but that it's here, it doesn't feel that way anymore.

We had an argument, a small one. But things escalated. This is the problem of always holding things. A small pressure, then you let everything out. This is what happened. And I kinda regret it. I said things, horrible things. I told her how I regretted meeting her, how she wasn't even my first choice, how I regretted marrying her and how my life has been miserable ever since she come into it.

We have had bad days, a lot of them. Especially after I lost my job. She has tried her best, but I have always felt some disrespect. So yesterday was the day I let it all out. I don't know how I feel, I can't explain how I feel. I somehow regret. 4 years with a 2 year old child is almost going down the drain, just like that.

Now, if she stays, things will never be the same, if she leaves, things will never be the same. I don't know if this is something we can talk about and solve. I'm just in a dilemma. Please advise if possible. What can I do? Married people of Reddit, how do you manage?

I've been playing this game the whole afternoon. I told myself one more game, kiasi kiasi ni 6pm. Anyway, any players here we connect for a game?

We talk a lot about the economy, but what are the specific things society pressures us to spend money on that just aren't worth it? Lavish weddings? Buying a car you can't afford just for status? Plotting land in some far-off place you'll never visit? Let's hear the biggest money traps people fall into here.

I’ll admit it: I used to think PP2 graduations were a waste of time. I only went because it meant the world to my daughter, and as the only parent in the picture, I couldn’t let her down.

I was wrong. The whole thing changed my perspective, and I have a new respect for everyone in the pedagogical realm, especially the ECDE teachers.

I was blown away by the presentations and by how much these kids know. Most of us millennials from the countryside didn’t get that kind of English fluency until Class 8, 😂😂😂. Maybe I’m easily impressed, or maybe I’m biased because my daughter was up there, but I’m calling it: the whole event was commendable.

Here’s the best part. My daughter gave me instructions on what cake to buy. Apparently, I’ve been buying her round cakes for every birthday and never noticed. This time, she said, I should get a square one to say congratulations. These kids are sharp!

Hats off to the teachers. This age group is loud and only goes quiet to eat or sleep, yet they absorbed all that noise and turned these kids into poets, acrobats, models, dancers, and even scouts. It was hilarious to watch, especially with every parent standing at the front to record.

This is just an appreciation rant from a very impressed parent and a very proud dad. Teachers, you’re doing amazing work. 🙌

I went to my barber yesterday evening and found a group of men there. Eventually, it was my turn, and I sat on the chair.

I simply said, “Ninyoe tu ile low taper nimezoea.”

The barber nodded, and I knew that today I'd be saying phrases like, “Mfiche wanawake wenu.”

As I was busy getting my shave, a dude walked in and said, “Bibi yangu ananiambia ati ninyoe hii nywele juu ni kubwa.” It was a gauge 3 hair and it actually looked good.

The men immediately burst into laughter.

Some said his hair wasn't even that long. Others claimed that some women deliberately try to make their men less attractive to other women. One guy even gave an example of a woman overfeeding her man until he gains weight and develops a huge stomach.

Then another guy said something that caught my attention.

He claimed that as long as you're living with a woman, don't even try to argue with her verbally because you'll lose. He went on to suggest that perhaps the man's wife thought another woman was telling him not to shave his hair because she wanted him to remain attractive.

At this point, I was just there listening. I'd gone for a haircut, but the men were giving me a whole new perspective on relationships.

And the stories didn't end there.

Another guy complained that having certain women in your life is like taking out a loan that you have to keep repaying.

He said, “Mara anakwambia, ‘Babe, ninunulie hii.’ Mara nyingine, ‘Nifanyie favour.’ Halafu tena, ‘Nitume pesa.’”

The men continued sharing their experiences in marriage and relationships, and honestly, I was shocked.

One guy even said that a woman could go an entire week without talking to you simply because she's angry. Imagine coming home every day, greeting someone who doesn't respond, eating in silence and going to bed without resolving whatever caused the disagreement.

The stories kept coming, and eventually, I just zoned out. I was simply trying to process everything these men were saying.

When the barber finally finished, I looked in the mirror and saw a handsome man staring back at me.

I smiled, paid my barber KES 100, and got up to leave.

He simply said, “Poa, next time.”

And just like that, I walked away with a fresh low taper.

But here's the thing: those conversations genuinely left me a little scared of marriage.

I just want to say im not doing so well mentally. This is probably nonsense. But im no longer feeling needed anywhere and im justnot happyin anything im doing..let's see where life takes me.

Public debt just hit 13.1 trillion. It was 8.7 trillion when he came in office. Our debt ceiling of 10 trillion, made by Parliament in 2024, has been toppled.

If everyone in kenya, new borns included, according to KBS the population is 54,227,015. We'd each pay sh 241,577.01, if we were to pay today.

4 triilion increase is insane, with little to nothing to show for it. But we're the ones who will be burdened with paying.

Huyu jamaa aende tu.

I have a theory, there is nothing like escaping the matrix. Why? Because the entire life game is the Matrix.

Imagine this, there are different rooms in the matrix arranged hierarchically based on their perks. The higher the room the more the perks. These rooms represent the social classes.

So, anyone talking or selling the escape the matrix program, is 'kinda' trying to tell you to upgrade your room in the matrix. Some of these are trying to sell you something.

Most probably 'hope or potential of escaping the matrix' so you subscribe to their program. As a result when you upgrade your room in the matrix, they also upgrade their room as well.

In the Matrix the higher rooms belong to oligarchs(wealthy families), billionaires, Authorities in veto power governments.

Anyone that irritates a person in a higher matrix level 'room', gets punished. For instance, Trump easily arresting the Venezuelan President.

You might think since the guy was a president, he had escaped the matrix. Naaah, he was just an easy prey for some else.

In short, you can't escape the matrix, you just upgrade your level inside it .

I've just seen that 4 more ebola cases have been confirmed, at this rate I foresee kasongo declaring that we have a national pandemic, tuanze tena kuambiwa tujipake sanitizer na kuvaa gloves.

But part of me thinks this is a plan by this government so that they have an excuse to suspend elections, you cannot assume how far these people are willing to go to hold on to power.

Lemme know what you want 😗

I remember some time back there was a full schedule for places to go over the weekend and new places to visit around Nairobi. I followed event pages on instagram, installed apps, and asked my friends to tag me along to any events they'll be attending.

But, a heavy blow to the heart came when...I have an event I'm attending, a game night, a networking event, Go Karting, Gaming,watch party, Fitness and outdoor but actually not a single soul to go with. All my friends became tied up in their busy schedules and welp, that made me cancel on going to this places alone, cause it's boring sometimes and get's pretty hard to strike a normal conversation with a stranger.

Thats why I made r/Nairobi_Connect , to get you off the burden of missing out, ot to get you of the burgain of whom to go with.

What you’ll find on r/Nairobi_Connect:

• "Tag along" Posts: Planning to go to a show, match, or festival and want company? Post your plans and link up with someone who'd like to go there too.
• Event Discovery: Weekly roundups of concerts, art shows, networking mixers, hikes, hidden gems and more across the city.
• Recaps & Reviews: Real photos, venue reviews, and recommendations from fellow Nairobians on events you've been looking to go to.
• Official WhatsApp Group: Fast-paced real-time link-ups, event leads, and active group.

Whether you're new to the city, looking to expand your social circle, or just want a group for a specific weekend activity, everyone is welcome.

I've noticed that there seems to be a flood of sellers using this approach in recent times. Whether it's in shops or while selling online there are so many sellers calling their clients things like, my love, darling, sweetheart etc

How effective is this? Does it really increase sales?

For me, I absolutely hate it.

It's such a fake inauthentic attempt at manipulation and I associate it with non-classy sellers.

I'm not 'your love' and now I'm less likely to spend any of my money on your products if you do that.

But then again, perhaps I'm just an outlier and maybe it works on other people out there.

Any business people out there who can confirm if it really works or if they do it just because?

Kama huyu ameiba post ya u/kenyaanqueen.

Errands by Rachael here...or should I say...Personal Assistant Rachael

Lately, I've been thinking of those mwecheche deals that can easily get you out of the block, like unexpectedly ,but still clean money.

For instance, selling a software/idea that solves a really huge problem or being that broker who benefits massively from closing a sale or any other high end deal that puts millions into your bank account.

So guys, what are some of those deals that made you or someone you know leave the block? And I'm talking about millions of money.

Please help a sister out with ideas coz this errands business isn't cutting it, although I still do it.

I visited 14 Falls recently and was disappointed. The scenery is beautiful, but the activities felt underwhelming and not worth the price.

Boat ride: Only about 20 metres.

Forest adventure: A short walk through a small bush, also around 50 metres.

Most frustratingly, we saw the price poster only after the tour. The bill was 22500 when I had a budget of 3k max. I had to negotiate karibu tupigane. Visitors should be shown the full list of activities and prices upfront.

If you visit, ask for clear details and agree on the total cost beforehand. The scenery is worth seeing, but manage your expectations.

Wueh! Ndio nimeanza tu and damn, watu hawanunui😂. I thought I've come up with a good business idea and affordable compared to what's in the market. A few months now with zero sales😭. Nisaidieni na tips

I'm handcrafting human hair miracle knots/crochet. The business is online, started on tiktok and now Instagram. A bundle is 100g, different curl patterns and price starts from 3200 a bundle

Wtf is wrong with Vanessa?

Now I haven’t used Twitter for years… since like before it became X. I made a post on Reddit, knowing that one of the exhibits is not here. I was to have this discussion with him soon. But, no, she has to carry the post over to Twitter. Now the exhibit will recognize his story 😒

You guys need to learn to leave some posts alone or change the stories.

I’ve since commented on her post idk if it can be taken down but I guess

F**k you Vanessa

The posts side by side : https://www.reddit.com/r/Kenya/s/8GQ7npLHaZ

yesterday i got a chance to be interviewed by a moving company and managed to land a job. I was told to go with some specifics like a letter from the chief, two passport sized pics and photocopy of my ID. The thing is i have no funds to look for those stuffs and as little as it may look it has been rough as you can see from my previous post.

I'm supposed to deliver them today but i'm really late and couldn't get anywhere to source that cash, just asking anyone and i'll appreciate. I can provide proof. If everything is fine i'll start on Monday and after 30 days i'll be able to submit your investment of 200kes just a struggling 23 year old appealing. Thank you.

EDIT: someone just sent me the money i'm actually working on the documents, thanks so much and hope on Monday ntapewa shati ya kampuni indicating official start of being epmloyed.

If you don't understand Kikuyu, it translates to "Take your clothes off " in a way.

Huyu bois anajiskia sana na hii jina , sio?

What are the craziest wifi names you've encountered?

Before calling KMD liars, ngojeni kwanza November iishe.

This was 2023 November.